Believing in love...
Believing that it will last forever
Is what broke me before

Believing that I was loved
And that that wouldn't change
Made it all so much harder

When it blew up in my face

Believing the words "I love you,"
And "I won't stop loving you,"
Led to my dislocated heart

So how could you blame me
For inevitable insecurities
Surrounding those words now?

Because I love you...

I cannot get enough of you
But every time I ask for a kiss
Or declare that I love you first

Internally, I am petrified
That you could reject me
As damage is more than done

On my self-esteem, on my heart

And I love you so so much
I just wish that didn't scare me
As I'm sick of feeling vulnerable

For the sake of being happy
And you make me so so happy
But that scares me every day

Because I will love you forever

It is easy to see that I'm flawed
Yes, it is splayed out for all to see
I am hopelessly co-dependant
Utterly disorganised and depressed

Stupidly ridden with anxieties
(Thus awful at living in the moment)
Easily distracted but not detached
And yet, deeply submerged in love

As you're my favourite thing
About myself

And it is easy to see that I'm loved
Or at least it should be, although,
You do remind me the right amount
For me to feel... not so lonely

Not so unloved
Not so unloveable

I always feel two steps behind
No matter what the topic at hand
Even things I'm sure that I'm sure of
You can break down that certainty
Within seconds

Make me doubt the person
That I know myself to be
I dare you
Convince me that I am someone else
Because I'm stubborn until I'm afraid

Afraid to be laughed at
Afraid to be judged
Afraid to be made into a fool

So I take the initiative and laugh it off
Because declaring "I'm just an idiot",
"I don't know anything about anything"
Or simply keeping my mouth shut
Is far easier than hearing it elsewhere

For him, it's either watch him fly sky-high or put him in the ground

I can't feel your painful memories,
But they do linger and try to follow
I hope you know, if you'd permit it,
I would bubble-wrap your shadow

Your knight in not-so-shining armour,
By your side, yet watching your back
I would slay any beast in your path,
Not to imply you have a weak attack

But I would fight for you forever,
Even though I call myself a lover
However, our love makes me strong,
So I will raise my fists for no other

But never ever to you, my darling,
I'd only ever dare wish you the best,
Apologise if I hold you too tightly
And, with every day, show you the rest

It feels different with her
Different with how she sees me
Because she... sees me,
She loves every part of me
That I want to love about myself
That I can acknowledge
As admirable traits to have
And she... admires me
And I admire her admiration
And I desire her love
She is so good
And I love every part of her
And she can't love herself
But maybe if she loves us
She can get there faster
And we try to move slowly
But my love for her,
It loves running races
And my heart races
When she moves with me
And we move with each other
And I love how we have moved since
And I loved how we moved before
But everything has led to this
Everything has led to us
And I love us
And I love every part of her
And she makes me
Feel like I am worth loving

You are so small, so petite
I could almost pluck you from this field of flowers and place you in my shirt pocket, just to see if you could possibly get any closer to my heart
I already feel you crawling from chamber to chamber
But ****, if I could feel your physical touch inside my chest, would it really feel so different ?
You are so warm, so gentle, so sweet
Always fresh as a daisy
And your hands,
Always busy as bees
And your lips,
As if carved from rose petals,
Remain forever on mine
Because I cannot stay away
Opiates are nothing compared to you
But, alas, I am addicted