The most oft lie I tell is I know
second may--
I can't judge, quite yet, may be
I love you, too.

I bought a one way ticket
at the price of all your pain,
On a plane with feathered wings
and an engine fueled by shame,
Now the memories get smaller,
But I can't turn around,
As I take off in the distance
and leave my shadow on the ground.

My homeland when this day I see,
Looks like a fairyland to me;
With its bright and dazzling lights,
Shining everywhere at night.
Beautiful my homeland fore’er shall be;
May its fairy-lights shine eternally;
Increase may its fame and glory,
As is now my country’s story.
Higher and higher its buildings grow;
How changed it is from eight years ago!
Vegetable-fields are many,
They’re grown instead of padi.
Many too are cars, tramcars, and buses –
They drive carefully for life is precious.
Streets, houses, things and all,
Are not the same anymore.

These memories of mine,
These senses through time;

Whisper of a never-ending summer,
And never-changing souls.
As if hidden behind ones own reflection,
Never to be reached again.

For, the only place this exiled world is permitted,
Is amidst the realms of dreams and limbo.
And solely a gaze beyond oneself,
May reveal the leap between realities.

So, here I stand on the edge of beginnings,
Ready to join the eternal summer;
Misled by the luring benevolence of timelessness,
In need of guidance back to the truth.

I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I must have done some wrong

Don’t know for how long i could be strong

I thought I cherished all I had

But I realise now that it was my bad

I was holding maybe too tight

Strangling, what I cared, with no respite

I have learned to pull back now

Hiding, what I used to share, anyhow

Now, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me fron reeling

.

I am lying here, crying under the moonlight

The lost moments find it easy to alight

I wish the sleep would come

the endless thoughts make me numb

What if I had done it differently

I might not have run into regret incidentally

I am counting the mistakes I made somehow

Maybe I am not guilty but they hurt anyhow

So, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I am not hiding under the plain sight

Still sometimes, I make the mistake, in spite

It’s a mistake to show your all

Nobody gives a **** in long haul

So I have started using these masks

Which makes hiding a less daunting task

I am now unlike the old me

Who used to let her feelings run free

That’s why, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

I am lying here, hiding under the moonlight

Burying the moments that wish to alight

Sometimes the old me, still runs wild

Crumbling the walls I so carefully compiled

I often let her do as she wishes

then see her tumble down into pieces

I have seen her hope crush a million times

falling down after a hopeful climb

It’s the reason, I have masks for every feeling

They often save me from reeling

.

Translated by Przemyslaw Musialowski 1/10/2019

Oh, how I miss the cornflowers and poppies,
lowlands, sands and dwarf pines,
rye bread and country girls
with the simplest of simple tastes.

I dream of such upbringing to later be able
to respect others without rejecting anyone,
and to always let them pull their cart of good fortune and misery,
being able to see not only our own right.

I'd like to believe that a neighbor always wishes you well,
that there's no between between the fields,
in order not to stain life with lies,
and that it is possible to never yell at anyone.

I miss the forest leaning in the wind,
the marigolds - children of wet meadows,
and those hard men who'd always stand up and fight
even without the chance of winning.

I miss shutters with a heart in the middle,
But most of all - white clouds.

Wieslaw Musialowski 12/4/2018