Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
 Jul 2018 Meera
Vineetha
Here I lay, gazing at the ceiling,
doubting myself,
cringing deep within the pain & failure time has caused,
counting my pulses to break free from the torment,
shielding from the scorn towards life.

Skirmishing to sustain, tussling to see the light on the other side,
just another day, just another night,
screamed the fortitude within,
only for the qualm to ante-up the very next moment.

“I can’t think straight”, declared the mind,
“It hurts”, voiced the heart,
“We are tired”, blared the heart & mind in unison
It’s exhausting that every breath I take is burdened with tangled thoughts,
every attempt to make things better turns fraught.
Should I give up?
Should I put an end to the whole discord?
Will then everything be alright? asked the failed clout.

As the fight within grew tougher,
the tenacity to quash negativity became firmer.
As I crawl through each day to reconcile with my happiness,
my credulity to beat the beast within revived.

I know it isn’t going to be easy,
I know I don’t feel the warmth of a sound mind yet,
I know I don’t feel the shelter of a calm heart yet,
Nevertheless,
there’s a shining hope within that it’s going to be okay.
I am not alone,
I am good enough,
I am strong enough,
I am brave enough,
I am stubborn enough to not give up, not yet,
I can wait one more day, one more night,
start all over again, and again
until I can finally feel at ease to be real and not perfect.
 Jul 2018 Meera
Vineetha
I remember it all,
that feeling,
right from the start,
dreadful to say the least –
you call yourself a friend,
and stab with envy,
not once, not twice,
but umpteen,
A liar who calls names,
A maniac who finds peace in it,
A cheat with a thirst for attention,
A freak who hasn’t yet realized —
you own none & never will,
A nefarious who under the pretense of help
expects *******.
Don’t you see, don’t you descry–
I see it all,
the evilness behind the smirk,
the cabal behind the kind gesture,
the mask behind which you hide the whole caboodle.
Today as it slips wide in the open,
I pity you,
I loathe you as you feel superior in other’s melancholy,
my tears don’t signify my weakness,
they ratify my regret of ever knowing you.
my tears don’t imply I lost my fight to you,
they justify your ignominy in the name of friendship.
my tears don’t involve you calling names,
for they anguish staying silent,
and not unmasking you sooner.
For you presuming otherwise,
is just mocking your own morale.
As you try to get closer,
I drift further,
as you push me to the edge,
I pick taking a fall,
than stay with you up there.
I feel sorry, you don’t yet realize,
you dug your own slump,
It was time people knew the real you,
It was time I realize my reticence was worth it,
It was time when truth won over myth,
It was time you debarked to where you started,
It was time you would see, what you have done all this while,
to hurt none but yourself,
and lived nothing but a lie.
#fakefriendship #envy #lies #betrayal
 Jul 2018 Meera
Vineetha
While I worked hard,
it came easy to her,
While she was a natural at it,
I had to grind my way to it.
A thought crossed my mind,
It’s unfair,
I had no flair,
no natural gift to spare,
for it’s meant only for the gifted,
and the blessed.
Upon reconsidering,
I wasn’t impuissant,
I had the vigorous tool of all–
belief in myself,
a clear path to achieve the goal.
Although rudimentary,
still, the one to fetch happiness.
It might take longer,
it might get harder,
but certainly is doable,
for it’s not about the gift, but grit.
 Jul 2018 Meera
Vineetha
While you stand exactly where you started with envy towards me,
I work my way to be a better version of myself each day.
While you’re working hard slandering me to the rest,
I work my way to be an erudite one day.
While you’re hustling to build an army to fight me,
I work my way to be strong and powerful enough to stand-up to you alone.
While you find comfort when people trust your deception over my truth,
I work my way to better understand the world; not to trust folks more than they deserve.
While you’re buried in a plot to win a reaction from me,
I work my way to reassure myself you’re neither worth my time nor my attention.
While you’re engrossed in feeding your insecurity,
I work my way to appreciate everything and not lose my mind over things undeserving.
While you’re diligent to be me,
I work my way to convince you every single time that–
No matter how hard or long you try; you can never be me.
 Jul 2018 Meera
Vineetha
I get it,
I get it when you say–’You just got lucky’,
I get it when you say–’Anyone could do it’,
I get it when you say–’Well! That was easy’,
I get it–
I get it because that wasn’t my first, and,
won’t be my last bumping into your ignorance.

Lucky you say–
Did you ever try looking me in the eye
when I had no tears left to cry?
Did you ever try marching with me down that road
where failure was inevitable?
Did you ever try sliding with me
when I came crashing down that uphill battle?
Did you ever try peeking into my tangled brain
when it was forever stuck in a loop?
Did you ever try living the moment with me
through the burden of being oblivious?

Anyone could do it.
But they didn’t–
because they chose,
serene over sailing through the chaos,
hole-up over encountering the storm,
surrender over taking control, and
fear over faith.

Well! That wasn’t easy–
The scuffle that squeezed the blood and sweat,
the fear that kicked the gut,
the anxiety that killed the spirit,
most of all– the dread of not making it, ever!
For all that matters,
Luck isn’t wizardry–
luck that you see as complimentary,
is the outcome of the chances that I took in disguise.
#struggle #hardwork #nevergiveup
 Jul 2018 Meera
Inked Quill
My cravings
Drenched
Seeking deeper taste
Of you
Insatiable desire
At the centre
Of my heart
To write poetry
On your chiseled body
Your moans
Send me on frenzied flow
Sinfully voracious
Visually I feast
Your naked hide
Every curve of your body
Purest form of masterpiece
 Jul 2018 Meera
Hannah
broke
 Jul 2018 Meera
Hannah
just two kids
riddled with anxiety and depression
finding comfort in each other
loving each other
stumbling through life
hoping to make it out
alive
 Jul 2018 Meera
Destiny C
My presence is a burden.
The world has no room for a worthless body,
breathing but not mentally present-
each stroke of the razor,
slowly relieving me-
each drop of blood taking my burden off of someone's shoulders.
I was never meant to be here,
so I know the end is almost near.
This pain I feel inside,
sits right next to where emptiness resides.
Some live beautiful lives,
But me, I know I'm meant to die.
 Jul 2018 Meera
Destiny C
Demons
 Jul 2018 Meera
Destiny C
All my demons coming to play.
One tells me to slit my throat-
The other tells me to pray.

One tells me to bleed.
The other tells me 'sweet dreams'.
I cannot trust one or the other-
Maybe even both.
But I cannot escape them.
One sits on my bed.
The other is inside my head.
I'm not psychotic or even hallucinating,
just hiding from my demons.
 Jul 2018 Meera
Destiny C
Inebriation
This liquid numbs my soul.
It gives me strength in its content , as
I no longer have any.
It's strong burn down my throat
allows for me to feel something.
Anything.
No need to chase a welcomed guest.
I'm afraid to feel-
so I mask.

in pulls
in shots
in any form I can have it.

The inebriation is euphoric.
Unlike any other feeling ,
This liquid numbs my soul .

There are many things I drink to achieve this state of inebriation.
The strongest liquor of them all-
Love.
Next page