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3d · 173
Dead end
Life gave me a map and said "Follow this track
Work hard and stay focused; Don't ever look back.
Don't worry, I'll keep you safe- I give you my word."
I listened, and agreed, for my vision was blurred.

Little did I know, I was on the wrong trail
Far away from my dreams, I was doomed to fail
I'm looking for signs where they'll never be found
I'm shouting for help... but I can't hear a sound
I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere in dread
I thought Life made us strong...it gave me fear instead.
3d · 28
Grey
I'm the lone cloud on a summer's day
So many beg me to go away
Yet I stay on for the prayers of pain
For those longing for a bit of rain.
Mar 23 · 63
What I'd ask Cupid
Marya123 Mar 23
Will these hands ever stop writing for them
Hoping they'll read, understand and smile?
When will this soul learn to detach itself
Wishing they'll feel it, and stay awhile?

Will this heart ever stop beating for them
Stealing the life from this mortal shell?
It'll suffer in silence with all its pain
If it means they'll be happy and well.

Why do we love so much...that it hurts?
Will this heartache be worth it one day?
Can we heal from the wounds that no one sees?
Will you ever answer those who pray?
Mar 22 · 65
Heartbent
Marya123 Mar 22
She's the better one for you
I know, I know that well
Go out with her, bend my heart
It won't break under your spell.

It's just a crush (I tell myself)
I'll try to work my way through
But just for now, I won't lose hope
That we could be me and you.
Mar 17 · 38
Cyclone
Marya123 Mar 17
My life is a thunderstorm
That I watch, powerless, in vain
As it destroys flowers of hope
With every barrage of rain.
Mar 14 · 78
Wishful
Marya123 Mar 14
I'm the lone star next to the Moon,
Watching you gaze at her in awe,
Wishing you were seeing me instead.
Mar 13 · 57
Almost
Marya123 Mar 13
I'm on the brink of running away,
At a clifftop, staring at the sea
It looks so tempting, to let it all go
To finally live in ecstasy...

But if there's a chance I can fight today
If it's possible I can be fearless
Maybe I'll turn this from a tale of Woe
To one of Triumph from utmost distress.
Trying to find courage.
Mar 10 · 58
Lost poem
Marya123 Mar 10
Time flies so fast,
That I'm stuck,
Paralyzed
Watching
As my words
Drift away....
As I fade...

Into..

Nothing.
Mar 5 · 32
Worthy
Marya123 Mar 5
Even if your road is arduous and rough
I want you to know that you ARE good enough.
Mar 1 · 43
Vulnerability
Marya123 Mar 1
My mask is made up of elaborate lies
If anyone found out what rests beneath,
There would be... everything to despise.

It gets heavier every single day
With each untruth put to make it strong
The world appears hopeless, dull and gray

Will I ever detach it from me?
Could I perhaps learn to see again
To live away from the misery?
Feb 27 · 161
Seasonal
Marya123 Feb 27
I've been writing from the throes of Winter,
Frosty words forming from the sullen snow
With tears that freeze into harsh memories
Building ice sculptures I could have let go.
Perhaps it's time I sow the seeds of joy
In the fresh soil unveiled as the winds blow
If I tend to them with hope and sunlight
Maybe the verdant words of Spring will grow.
Feb 27 · 70
Wanderlust
Marya123 Feb 27
I'm a scared train running away
Help me, I cannot feel my brakes!
I want to live for one more day.
I only need to know what it takes
To be calm, to find peace again
To try and become what I once was
Proud, a master of dealing with pain
Not this broken coward, this lost cause.
Hope, are you out there? Don't elude me
I've been calling your name for so long
Perhaps you think I'm not worthy
Give me a chance- I'll prove you wrong.
Lead me to safety, to my track
This quiet unknown might be my end...
Guide me to an honest way back
Just this once, could you be my friend?
Feb 22 · 28
Resurrection
Marya123 Feb 22
I am a burnt, weak bird
Learning to be a phoenix,
To rise from the ashes.
Feb 15 · 123
Better behind a screen
Marya123 Feb 15
I'm better behind a screen
From where I would well pretend
That I have it all figured out
Not waiting for problems to end.

I'm better behind a screen
Where I'd say I know to live
To enjoy it all in the now
And make no mistakes to forgive.

I'm the best behind a screen
Where I could escape this strife
I'd be who I want to be
And not defeated by life.
Feb 12 · 172
Run
Marya123 Feb 12
Run
If there were a fairy land
To which I could run
With nothing to see or do
I'd bask under the sun.

Why does this monster named Life
Push us to hate it so?
I'd rather leave and walk away
Than pretend it makes me grow.
Feb 8 · 62
Goodbye
Marya123 Feb 8
Now that you're gone, I wish I could say bye
If there was just one more moment we shared
I'd tell you, and hope that God would be kind
But He wasn't, and now we lie, shocked and scared
All I can do is offer these poor words
And dream that you'd notice them, with love
Maybe you'd smile, and shine brighter in grace
Perhaps fill our lives again, from above.
Feb 1 · 720
Loneliness
Marya123 Feb 1
A mere phantom of life
Silent and miserable
Waves as people walk by,
Yells 'I'm here, invisible!'

It doesn't know they don't see
It doesn't know they can't hear
It shouts till its throat is sore,
Then finds solace in fear.

Will they ever listen?
Will they stop to understand?
Will anyone look further
Maybe even lend a hand?
Feb 1 · 40
Thoughts of a dream
Marya123 Feb 1
Dreamers are told to always aim high,
To never give up in times of distress
The big dreams are noble, and worth the try
But the small ones are here too- they're not worthless.
Feb 1 · 401
Impostor
Marya123 Feb 1
'Fake it till you make it', I'm told
As I tremble under the weight of fear
It's a warm statement, yet one so cold
What do I fake if nothing's clear?
The path to success is paved with questions.
Jan 27 · 239
Raindrop
Marya123 Jan 27
When my birth-cloud let me go, she said 'Be well'
I didn't understand what she meant till I fell
I'm hurtling aimlessly toward an unknown ground
I tried to climb back, but there's no help around
I forget I'm unique, I'm carried by air
To where I'd disappear...and no one would care.
Impending doom.
Jan 24 · 68
Stream of thought
Marya123 Jan 24
Maybe there's a point in everyone's life
When the words just stop feeling good enough
When our literary rivers stop flowing
And writing poems, stories, anything, is tough.

Perhaps we must wait for the ice to melt
When the writer's glaciers will start to thaw
At different, unique times for all of us
And we'll find words again, heartfelt and raw.
Marya123 Jan 20
Little spider in the corner,
Don't ever think you don't belong
I'm an insect, and I see you
I think you're beautiful and strong.

Little spider in the corner,
You're not like anyone here
You have eight legs, you can make web
You're amazing, and that is clear.

Little spider in the corner,
Don't think that you're destined to fail
You're not broken, you will achieve
Once the storm clears, your boat will sail.

Little spider in the corner,
Come join us, we will welcome you
The humans may not understand
But we are one, that's always true.
Jan 9 · 172
Lady-in-waiting
Marya123 Jan 9
I'm a dead-eyed damsel who wants to fly
Who's too scared to leap- and doesn't know why.
Forever in distress, I lie in wait
Till some hero swoops in and saves my fate.
Alas, he doesn't arrive, and I die
Drowning in the pool of tears I cried.
Forgotten.
Jan 9 · 86
Poet's lament
Marya123 Jan 9
I've lost my good pen.
Try as I might, to write well
My words still fail me.
Writer's block.
Jan 8 · 117
Change
Marya123 Jan 8
Change is a wild dog that can't be tamed
One that will always test your patience
One that refuses to sit in silence
That doesn't respond when you call its name.

But it will watch as you transform, with pride
Living forever, challenging your ways
It will stay for the rest of your days
You're never alone with Change at your side.
Jan 7 · 92
Blood
Marya123 Jan 7
Love is pain, the bleeding of a soul
A wound that doesn't hurt, when made whole
Joined with another, in a unique way
Rising together to face a new day.

Yet when torn apart, the pain flares once more
Memories haunt, they bruise, marring it sore
The spirit endures fresh cuts trying to heal
While losing the will to move on, to feel.
I won't let the heartbreak define me
I won't be a victim in my story.
I'll write, I'll create to fill this hole
Maybe one day I will take control.
Dec 2019 · 105
Envy
Marya123 Dec 2019
How magnificent she must be
If she could capture his fancy.
How insignificant I am
If he won't even give a ****.
Dec 2019 · 198
Good insomnia
Marya123 Dec 2019
If I must lose sleep
To dreams of you
I'll stay awake
Wishing we were true.
Dec 2019 · 75
A toast to words
Marya123 Dec 2019
Here's to the words of the decade
The ones filled with hope, and longing
Those written dreaming of better times
Wishing for a sense of belonging.

Here's to the words of tragedy
Those wept out by heartfelt despair
The ones unread, beacons of shame
Yearning to be seen, and know who'd care.

Here's to the words that are neutral
Conveying little to no emotion
They matter, just like all the rest,
Setting whole worlds into motion.

Here's to the words that will be made,
From obstacles to be withstood
In seasons of unknown fortune,
May they reach us, and be understood.
Dec 2019 · 45
Impossible
Marya123 Dec 2019
You are the river, the one that seeks the sea
Changing, powerful, strong, you go along with the flow
Following every impulse, soon, you will reach her.

I am a tree at your side
Living because of you
We will never meet again
You can't stop for me
Yet I fall for you anyway.
Dec 2019 · 59
Geology
Marya123 Dec 2019
I'm tired of stories of success in life,
Diamond worlds that shine through the ages
Tell me of when they were heartbroken coal
Read me the pain within countless pages
The hardship, the despair in rock bottom
The seven seas of tears from broken pride
Show me the canyons they carved in their path,
Shattered walls that led to the truth inside.

Teach me their history, I'll believe they're real,
Maybe with some hope, I can try to heal.
In this Instagramming world... there's little place for sadness, for pain and heartbreak- the things that make us truly human. It's not just what's on the surface that makes us who we are.
Dec 2019 · 109
Extinguished
Marya123 Dec 2019
How wonderful it is to be aflame
I don't long to be brighter than the rest
I wish I could burn of my own free will
But perhaps this time, death is for the best.

If there is a day when I'm set ablaze
For a brief moment I might glow again
I hope I'm remembered as useful fire,
Perhaps my rebirth will not be in vain.
Acceptance of fate.
Dec 2019 · 312
Undead
Marya123 Dec 2019
"What doesn't **** one must make one stronger."
Perhaps I broke that rule- I still feel weak.
Does this mean the struggle will last longer?
I have lost the will to fight anymore
My wounds aren't healing, they've become too sore.
So I roam around earth, half-dead, alive
Dreaming of a future that isn't bleak
Knowing I can't live, I'll only survive.
Dec 2019 · 136
Where there's no will
Marya123 Dec 2019
**** the glass ceiling
It's too high in the sky
I'm still at rock bottom
Only wanting to cry.

Let someone else break it
I'm too weak to move
Maybe this was a mistake
I have nothing to prove.
There is no way.
Dec 2019 · 50
Mark
Marya123 Dec 2019
Hold on, it'll get better soon.
One day you'll find the strength to pull yourself up,
And it'll be glorious
Like moonshine on a rock,
Like the sun over the seas,
Like new waves on a forgotten shore.
You will make your mark, and it will not go unnoticed.
Rise up, stranger. You are loved, and so very worthy of life.
Nov 2019 · 114
Light
Marya123 Nov 2019
Here's a bit of light
In your darkest hour
You can get out of this
You can do more than cower.
I'm with you, always
Rise up from your knees
Find your way out of the tunnel
Dance along that breeze.
You may not know the steps
You may not hear the song
But your twirl is your own
You are forever strong.
Nov 2019 · 34
Leaf
Marya123 Nov 2019
I live on top of my very own tree
Lush and green, just like all my friends
They long for the fall, when they'll touch the ground,
Must I go along with this trend?

It seems so pointless, waiting for autumn
Staring at the sun, playing with its rays
I'd rather be here forever and grow
I don't want to waste the rest of my days.

Alas! This wish was never to come true
I fade to brown, bidding goodbye
I join the wind, that guides me to the earth
In my next life, I'll reach the sky.
Nov 2019 · 94
Novel
Marya123 Nov 2019
If my life were a book, written in ink,
It would tell a tale brought back from the brink
With sentences well constructed with rhyme,
Of inkblots made by wasting precious time,
Of full-stops, colons, and commas galore,
Filled with desire to learn, and explore,
Aging sheets of regret pondering the past,
Some wondering how long the story will last.
Only Death takes away this humble pen
It's just a small matter of how and when-
This book won't ever be a bestseller
But it will be honest- a truth-teller
That's unfinished and revised endlessly,
Until it joins the pages of history.
Nov 2019 · 160
Sand
Marya123 Nov 2019
My life's made of glass: particles of sand
That can't be sorted by my clumsy hands
So I sit and watch it shatter
In the end, it just doesn't matter.
Ridiculously bad poetry.
Nov 2019 · 310
Swimmer
Marya123 Nov 2019
Just keep swimming, Dory said to me
As I gasped for air under the sea
I'm now at the surface, looking around
Water everywhere, land's not to be found
I move, I cry, I surge back with a wave
When will this ocean finally behave?
Nov 2019 · 76
Wound
Marya123 Nov 2019
I've been wounded my entire life
I'm bleeding, but I hold the knife.
I need to stop- I forgot how to feel
Perhaps I don't believe I'll ever heal.
Nov 2019 · 558
Punctuation
Marya123 Nov 2019
You're the best sentence I've ever beheld
Grammatically correct, succinct and true,
I've always been the lone apostrophe
But I'd become a comma, just for you.
Ridiculously sappy. As is love.
Nov 2019 · 121
Unrequited
Marya123 Nov 2019
He's in all the letters I write- and never send
He's in the poems I create- but never share,
He's in every thought, every song- he's 'just a friend'
How I wish he'd know he's in every breath of air.
Oct 2019 · 45
Mountaineer
Marya123 Oct 2019
Holding to the edge of a cliff
Screaming into an endless void
"Help! I'm hanging on for life
Heal me, I'm trying not to fall
Hurt me, I want to feel again
**** me, so I may be reborn."
Oct 2019 · 99
Lost tale
Marya123 Oct 2019
There once was a poet who moved
With words as a crutch, through the days
He knew where to get a new one
To support him through life, always.

But the time came that he was lost
In a forest, hungry and tired
He couldn't find the way back home
His word of the day had expired.

And so he lay in wait till dawn
So he'd have a clearer mind
He resolved to visit the store
For an anchor that sounded kind.

Month after month, year after year
Passed slowly as he searched in vain
Until he couldn't walk a step
So then he crawled, wailing in pain.

He'd known this would happen to him
'Writer's block', a feared condition
That attacked those forged from language
There was no cure for this affliction.

And soon the town forgot their names
The woods became haunted in grief
Of poetic ghosts that long for words
In damnation without relief.
Nonsensical poem that tells a story that might be true. Let's never ever stop writing when we get stuck. We owe it to history.
Oct 2019 · 230
Offspring
Marya123 Oct 2019
I was born to beautiful swans.
Yet I see no resemblance.
I remain an ugly duckling.
Oct 2019 · 208
Questions
Marya123 Oct 2019
Is there a life beyond these fears
That bear the root of all the tears?
Can one learn to be wilfully blind
To tell the difference between cruel and kind?
Is it possible to try and wait
To better accept an impending fate?
Can one refrain from asking why,
To live now, bidding the past goodbye?
Sep 2019 · 534
Fictional
Marya123 Sep 2019
If I were fictional
A part of another land
I'd use my powers to do good
No life would taste so bland.

If I were fictional
I'd be a spirit one can't see
Invisible guardian angel
To brighten a bleak history.

If I were fictional
One would always find success,
Never ever know of worry
They'd forever be blessed.

If I were fictional
The world wouldn't know heartache
Minds would be cured instantly
In strong bodies that won't break.

If I were fictional
I'd find him, and he'd be mine
I'd love to become his
Two souls together, entwined.

But I remain real
I'm not a made-up ghost
I can't change my life, I've tried
And somehow, that hurts the most.
Sep 2019 · 105
Forgotten poem
Marya123 Sep 2019
I stay hidden beneath billows of dust
It's been ages since I was read, with trust.
How wonderful the days I was found,
Perused in the quiet, without a sound
I looked for the change in my readers' eyes
(I cannot see, but I sensed, in disguise)
As my maker's words jog a memory,
Detect emotion, chase it to be free,
When they recall, when they feel, in their core
They relate; They aren't alone anymore.
It's nice to be understood, to be heard,
To be visible without saying a word.
So I shall lie, waiting, for the next time
The soot is cleared, and someone reads my rhyme.
What I imagine a forgotten poem would think, as it lies in wait, through history.
Sep 2019 · 481
Journey
Marya123 Sep 2019
I'd walk ten thousand miles to find peace
To Japan, via Portugal and Greece.
I'd hike the Himalayas to find calm
I'd discover the meaning of a Psalm.
I'd meditate in Tibet to find quiet
I'd learn to maintain a balanced diet.
I'd take a yoga class to stretch my feet
I'd focus on the sound of a heartbeat.
I'd be mesmerized by the light of day
Lurking by a sea, staring at a bay.
I'd swim across an ocean for a while
Wishing to regain my former style.
If and when I do reach my goal
I hope I'll finally become whole.
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