How fateful is it,
Finally finding myself present,
Alone as I have been,
Shadows homely and comely.

Eyes not meant for myself alone,
Ears not meant for myself alone,
Smelling not familiar sensations come summer,
Mind not meant for my own thoughts.

But come sunrises and sunsets onward,
I will see myself in the past pleading,
Begging for kind futures to be proud of,
Suicidal thoughts fighting to break through.

Come the future through pain,
Hearing the chimes of summer bells,
Sweet lives and pleasures surround me,
Only if pain is sought in the present.

This is my message to you. I know you'll see it soon. Goodbye.

I stood upon the grey steps of Atrifore,
Bitter water greeting my feet with cold mists,
I stood with the ghosts of dignity and valour,
My broken body wishing to return to my tryst.

Stone steps cast their hex on my weary soles,
My cobalt eyes burned as my mind twisted,
My martyrized soul still struggling to regain control,
Ice winds serving as salt in wounds self-inflicted.

Feet submerged I stepped into the sea,
Silent howls tore through the ashen sky,
Mind numbing under this chilling syncope,
My flesh sank under the waves to die.

Warm soil forms and envelops my quiescent toes,
Worms and insects slowly crawl up my birch,
Animals wordlessly approach as I continue to grow,
Silently and calmly watching as I give birth.

Motionless movements shifting from view,
Skies ever coasting across the skyline,
Forests transfigured with ever changing hues,
My immobile body serving as a reticent shrine.

Many years I have wandered these woods,
Many years I have cast my eyes to the soil.

Many years I was content with this consuming darkness,
Many years I was content with these hyperborean nights.

I felt a warmth once such bitter evening,
I staggered and swayed until I rose upright,
I thought the moon was again out deceiving,
Gifting me again with only false hope this night.

I howled and screamed into the soulless night sky,
Thoughts turned knives into my heart and soul,
Mind cut and gashed now bleeding into my eyes,
I wildly lurched to and fro over this frozen knoll.

Again the light in the northern sky sounded,
I cast my crimson eyes upon it eagerly,
The golden glow left me aghast and astounded,
But I continued to move towards it greedily.

My footsteps left behind a trail of blood,
My footfalls sounded the songs of death,
Those crimson remains now awash with mud,
I fled that dark scene with haggard breath.

Frieden endlich gefunden.

Uneven steps reached the radiant light at last,
Outstretched arms finally experiencing warmth,
Feet gently swept off the frost laden ground,
I was spirited away to the castle of the evening.

Such a marvelous castle, bright and brilliant it was,
I wandered deeper and deeper through it's majesty,
Until I found myself in a room as pure as crystal,
A room inhabited by a single, quiet soul.

I recognized it as myself, but I was mistaken,
I recognized it as solitude, but I was mistaken,
I recognized it as pain, but I was mistaken,
I recognized it as a friend, and I was correct.

Soul approaching, I too traversed towards it,
Standing together, it reached out with a faint smile,
I tenderly held it near,
Until it began to shimmer and glow.

Stars it became before me, each all aflame,
Motionless I stood as it filled with the room with light,
Motionless I stood as it entered my body,
Transforming and transfiguring as it went.

All shades of black and grey could not escape,
Every dark corner was hunted and found guilty,
No unholy sanctuary was safe from this vengeful justice,
Until I rose to a new height, a new plateau.

I took myself into my arms and returned the weight to my shoulders,
I took myself into my legs and skated across the skyline,
I took my myself into my heart and swam through the river,
I took my soul into myself and stood guardian for all eternity.

Gaze upon my face, etched into stone,
See my soul put into silent words,
See how I do not stand out from my brothers,
Two black towers looming over us all.

See how I rest still,
Not on finger waved in protest,
See how I do not move,
Not a thought in my grave.

No funerals mourned my passing,
No living shed any tears,
One of countless souls lost,
I am content with this passing.

Ashen are the dreams I once had,
Sulfur are the aspirations I possessed,
Dirt are the hopes I wielded,
Death is the life I lived.

Thick smoke surrounds me now,
Suffocating all living souls near,
Sending them back to their homes,
Reminding them of their rightful place.

Stone marks the barren soil around me,
Air too deathly to breath surrounds me,
Skies too mournful encompass this earth,
Sins unforgotten keeping us forever silent.

I think that someone is trying to **** me,
Infecting my body - destroying my mind,
Oceans alive trying to send me into the sea,
See my soul soaked in salt and brine.

Sails scream and tear under heavy weights,
Ceaseless spray drowns all mirth and hope,
Seabeast sending us into panicked and dire straits,
Swiftly forcing us to the end of our ropes.

Ship destroyed in a frenzy of hate,
Hearts alive split into the deep blue sea,
Holes in the ship welcoming the floodgates,
We all sank together - with not a one escapee.

I clutch my heart in my hands,
I trudge towards the white mountain,
I bleed from my seams as I move,
I see nothing but a blur before me.

I reached the foot of the colorless mountain,
As pure as consciousness unmarred,
I look towards my weary and crimson feet,
To see that only I was tainting this ground.

I laid myself to rest. The snow returned the mountain to purity.

Sullen and crestfallen the autumn leaves silently fell,
Mourning the loss of the pure heart set adrift within,
The bitter northern winds serving as a reticent death knell,
Grieving over the loss of the pure lass astray in deerskin.

Drawn to the forests of Myrkviðr for reasons unknown,
She wandered within the woods until all spirits were silent,
Ancient limbs reaching out to caress her delicate cheekbones,
Likening her to newborn blossoms both ****** and vibrant.

Decades have flown by like wind since that day,
Memories as faded and tattered as her deerskin,
A beautiful soul lost to time through innocent naivete,
Life continuing as it always had in the woods within.

Splitting withered leaves in psychedelic wonders,
Walking through the scenic forest of denial,
Weapons of mass destruction crash like thunder,
Manufactured warfare never out of style!

Backbones half grown marching towards death,
Many majorities persecuted by minuscule minorities,
Deciding grey pawns are expendable as a spare breath,
Come quietly now or we'll have to alert the authorities!

Come die for your government one and all,
Trust it's best for you to die in a foreign country,
Drown that PTSD in a little bit of alcohol,
Until you're prematurely buried under a tree!

Finality found in roads left barren and desolate,
Arid and topaz fields filled with suffocation await,
Innocent hopes and pure dreams now reprobate,
Humanity swiftly and succinctly drowned in hate!

-Trampled Under Hoof-

Thick dust kicks up from this sulfur tar,
Suffocating the fools dim enough come near,
Ultra violence breeds screams from afar,
Thunder Puncher gored on a topaz field.

Trampled under hoof,
No escape from this fate,
Wishing he was saved,
Filling up with hate.

Even mutilated by nature his fists rose high,
Thunder Puncher still has the will to fight,
Standing as the warm blood still escapes his thighs,
Bloodied and muddied, fists flying with all his might.

-Trilobite-

Ripping and tearing,
Scorching and staring,
Never with bearings,
Always out scaring.

Who is he to fear,
Violently attacking all,
Sharp as a spear,
Hand held in a ball.

Now they've all fallen,
Trilobite the victor,
Blood falling like pollen,
Death the constrictor.

I wandered through this topaz valley,
Steep walls surrounding me flat and high,
Totally alone as I walked down this alley,
Below these hooded skeletons standing silently by.

Each skeleton stood two hundred yards in the air,
Dark ravens silently flying from their empty eyes,
Gazing too long at them was something I did not dare,
I kept my eyes downtrodden, far from the suffocating amber skies.

Tears filled my eyes as I slowly fell to my knees,
This world of pestilence and shadows filling my mind,
I swiftly shut my moist eyes as my heart began to freeze,
Only to open them in an inhuman location, cold and confined.

I stood atop a stone pillar, thousands of yards above ground,
Hundereds of circular obelisks as far as the eye could see,
I noticed modest fires lit in their centers as I glanced around,
And one in the center of my pillar, left there for me.

Dark souls circled around the sweltering flames,
Hunched over figures, both seen and unseen,
Holding hands so tightly I thought they were chained,
I crept towards them, hoping not to intervene.

They turned to me with peculiar smiles on their faces,
Without a word, they silently began to beguile,
Taciturnly demonstrating the evils of this world,
Until I finally concluded, yes, let me stay by these flames a while.

Through this scarred and sodden grove I sauntered,
Rhythmic footfalls silently treading through the destruction,
Never before had I seen a wood so tortured and haunted,
The saturated leaves still gracefully drifting in seduction.

Ich falle.

The moon emerged at last, clouds' curtain drawn,
A howl sounded out in the darkness, chilling and pure,
The shrill wail kept the woodland creatures withdrawn,
This cold loneliness again my own to savor.

Ich falle.

In a moment of passion, I traveled to the highest hill,
Emerging high above the poplars and oaks,
Releasing every spirit within me, I remained at a standstill,
Hands raised to the moon, I howled as I cast off my yoke.

Ich falle.

I sit alone in this garden of many colors,
Flowers bloom beautifully in this warm spring,
Seen through these eyes of mine, it grows duller and duller,
I cast my eyes down, feeling a shamed sting.

This breathtaking scene frustrated with me,
I crept to the center of these dense woodlands,
Moving beneath an ancient blue oak tree,
Grey still all around me, I sat with my head in my hands.

Minutes birthed hours.
Hours birthed days.
Days birthed weeks.
Weeks birthed eternity.

I know not how long I remained under that oak,
But I knew the cascading emotions within would not calm,
I rose to my knees, conjuring up some false hope,
Doing anything that I could to make myself carry on.

I found myself yearning for the poison once again,
I found my soul pleading and begging for another taste,
I felt my very ashes being ground against the grain,
As I locked myself away in solitude, my mind ever on that waste.

Life feels so very grey now,
Every color faded and old,
Crawling on by somehow,
With this heart still ice cold.

Here I still am, and here I will remain,
I wait for my live-giving spark to return,
Praying for an end to this ceaseless hurt and pain,
Praying for the singular want I still yearn.

Color to coat this grey slate.

The dense forests and ragged hills were still on this eve,
Their inhabitants silent as the chill north-wind blew in,
This coming torrent would be a force all would receive,
This frigid embrace would soak all bark, fur, and skin.

Trees crying as their limbs tore, whipping to and fro,
The woodland creatures scurrying back to their holes,
Great flashes of lightning would illuminate the high plateaus,
Blossoms blown away to the darkness, howling winds claiming souls.

Firm and resolute earth turned softhearted and weak,
The downpour snuffing out every disparaging notion,
Quickly doing away with the timid and meek,
It caressed all equally in these ceaseless motions.

She tore lightning across the canopy of Earth,
Flames leaping to life, only to be snuffed out a moment later,
This cycle endlessly repeating, death and birth,
Until we all felt the shadow of this savage conciliator.

Bis wir alle von diesem grausamen Schlichter bedeckt waren.

Striding forth from his mountain in the sky,
He came to us with speed and haste,
Cantering forward with mist and rains, clouds on high,
He gave to us this fertile soil, our hunger he erased.

He left as soon as he came, his work finished,
Our thankless beings scurried about with nary a peep,
Our stores full, our fields and crops replenished,
With even peace of mind gifted to us as we sleep.

Seasons shift and change, he came to us once again,
Bringing a chill in the air as he arrived, our mirth went cold,
Once gifting life and prosperity, he now came with fury and pain,
Biting frost and snows grasped us in a ceaseless stranglehold.

On these white fields we rest,
Wind howling as though possessed,
We then begged for the end,
And one by one, we would ascend.

Seventeen times I have walked - or stalked?
Eighteen times I have died - or tried?
Nineteen times I have bled - or said?
Twenty times I have fallen - still crestfallen?

Question!

Such a breathtaking and beautiful melody awaited me,
As I gracefully sailed to the magnificent shores of gold,
A splendid figure visiting me on this shimmering sea,
Singing sweet songs to me as I passed through this watery threshold-

Four times I have mutated - or castrated?
Two times I have killed - feel fulfilled?
Three times I have lied - or implied?
One time I have cried - or died?

Question!

One thousands blades covered the uninhabitable fields,
The blood soaked grounds coated in crimson-red,
Malevolent spirits rose up from the ground without yield,
Violent thoughts and weapons born from those very dead.

Defiant screams filled the frigid night sky,
Their wasted souls seeking death and revenge,
Living souls ****** and left to rot and die,
This ritual cleansing was that on which their vengeance would hinge.

Night fall.

Fifty seasons past, in times overgrown and abandoned,
Lived Hinterlands vast and wild, twice as unknown as fate,
Holding many mysteries both bewildering and unknown,
Lands wild, confusion and treachery all they would ever create.

A colony of spirits inhabiting the oak trees,
They would move in purpose and silence,
To and fro, the colony traveled as they pleased,
Killing under the moon, hands upraised in defiance.

The great wolf left loose,
He prowled through the land once again,
His mark found on every tree and every spruce,
Until a traveler sought the beast, and it was gracefully slain.

The sleeping foe was as tall as the night sky,
With every breath he would poison the air around him,
Thick stone-flesh covering his single ruby eye,
His foresight was still strong and true, tidings proved grim.

Hinterlands Folklore heard clearly and truthfully,
Untarnished by the seasons change, year after year,
Histories left both bizarre and beautifully,
Eloquently left in text, yet in history painfully austere.

Idle hands unseen, scarred and alone,
A tortured mind left unfettered by his fellow man,
The flesh falters and slips, heart hardened to stone,
Eyes burn like hellfire, again he slices off his lifespan.

His river now barren and dry,
The soil around him consumes and devours,
Time unspent well, his end is deformed and awry,
Decades birthing years, birthing days, birthing hours.

Twilight shatters at the hand of dawn,
The ice encasing this scarred flesh thaws,
Ice turned life, this pained hurt seemingly gone,
A pure light welcoming me, for no discernible cause?


Once only bringing death to the beautiful dawn's light,
I now see a beauty in these fires, inviting and warm,
I rise to my weary feet, reaching newfound heights
At home at last in this falling snow, in this passionate storm.

My sacrifice bids farewell.

Concepts bleeding out in confusion,
The frost eats away at these last remnants of life,
Arms deep in this ice river, my reflection a faint illusion,
This familiar sensation slices me open like a knife.

Sweet release found in this serene death,
Sinking deeply into this dead river, as lifeless as I,
Visions of the past play out during my final breath,
All other thoughts locked away in frost, I say my last goodbye.

White hot ashes mixed with bones around me,
Decapitations held aloft with dark pride,
Screams of the dying ring like howling banshees,
Lowering my prize, I toss it to those who have already died.

Cherished and revered, I return to my home,
The skies still burning, in this earthly place I feel no rest,
Oceans of humans wash over me, but I am still alone,
Until the day finally comes when my mind pierces my chest.

I see a light before me, bright as day,
I see peace ahead, but I still yearn to go own way,
The clouds on the horizon float out of sight,
On my knees, this has broken the last of my fight.

Gentle ringing fills these dead ears,
Crying tears of sorrow for my wasted years,
Yesterday's sorrows, tomorrow's white light
Soul chained beneath the ground, never to take flight.