There's that one song
It was ours
Even if we didn't say it was
We both just knew

Whatever we had is extinct
But the song, now toxic, lives on
It makes it harder to forget
When I hear it, flashbacks replay in my head
That time I felt on top of the world

-"Trees on Fire"

Emotions are pure.
Intentions are true.

As eyes wander,
my heart flutters.

Can you not feel?
Can you not see?

My heart still palpitates,
soul still anticipates.

But feelings are already far
and I am now barred.

For you are with another
and mine no longer.

I drink
A majority of the time to have fun
To hang out with friends
To laugh
And sing
And just be me
Without being ME
To get out of my head
Because everyday is a constant battle
With anxiety
Or boredom
I'd say depression but I'm not Depressed
Everyday I freak myself out
Is the world going to end
Am I going to die today
Are we even real
Why am I in pain
Should I **** myself
Should I **** someone
WHY IS EVERYONE LOOKING AT ME
WHY ARE THEY YELLING
ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT ME
HELP SOMEONE HELP ME
OH GOD I CAN'T BREATH
WHAT IS AIR
IM DROWNING
IM LOSING CONTROL
IM FIGHTING BUT AM I WINNING
IM SCARED
CAN THEY HERE MY THOUGHTS
IS THIS ALL FOE NOTHING
WHY AM I LIKE THIS
so I drink
A majority of the time to have fun
To laugh
To sing
And just be me
Without being ME

My cheek pressed against your chest
Inhaling the cologne across your collarbone
My fingers running through your velvet hair
Your arm wrapped around me just below my ribcage
Pulling me in close
Our breathes in sync
As we fall asleep

- best sleep

I drink to have a good time
To numb the pain

When I stumble back to my place
Being alone feels 10x worse

I miss your body pressed up against mine
You tricked me

Gave me taste of something I didn't know I was longing for
You've got me addicted

You are the drug
I drink to have a good time

- "Let's keep things causal"