I have alcohol in my veins
Telling me I’m not ok.

I have anxiety in my brain
Slowly driving me insane.

I’ve a heart that I’ve kept caged
Even though it can’t be tamed.

I keep looking for beautiful change
Knowing life’s an unfair game.

-ARI

your eyes remind me
of a crystal clear
sea with waves
crashing every second

it's a good thing i don't share my writing with you
because if i did,
you'd see that
you
are the boy with the ocean eyes and
i
am not really okay.

Sometimes my insecurities
would get a hold of me
Now I'm starting to see the best
within myself and I know
that this curse is a gift
I still have a whole lot of life
left to live
and I know which path I need to take
I might be alone for a long time
I still have a long way to go
And I know in time
I'll find the one for me

Everyone has seen through me
But I am starting to believe
There is a whole lot more to me
And nobody can take away
this feeling that's taken me higher
my heart is still full of desire

I've been given a gift
to cherish and share
It's been a rough start
But I'll get there
and you may think
that you can bring me down
I've already been pushed and tossed
into the ground
so maybe, maybe
you should just take me as I am

Guardian angel where have you been?
I've been sitting and staring
Thinking I'll never win
Now that you're here
You're picking me up
Fixing me up
rebandaging this broken heart
and maybe my luck is changing
maybe I can make it
because I've been waiting
Maybe I can make it

Everyone has seen through me
But I am starting to believe
There is a whole lot more to me
And nobody can take away
this feeling that's taken me higher
my heart is still full of desire

I've been given a gift
to cherish and share
It's been a rough start
But I'll get there
and you may think
that you can bring me down
I've already been pushed and tossed
into the ground
so maybe, maybe
you should just take me as I am

Take me as I am
Let me shine
One last time
Before the light dies out
For the last time
Let my gift
Light up the night
And I'll share this
with you for all time

Everyone has seen through me
But I am starting to believe
There is a whole lot more to me
And nobody can take away
this feeling that's taken me higher
my heart is still full of desire

I've been given a gift
to cherish and share
It's been a rough start
But I'll get there
and you may think
that you can bring me down
I've already been pushed and tossed
into the ground
so maybe, maybe
you should just take me as I am

©2018 Written By Benji James

I have something
I need to get off my chest
and this is the way
I know I can bring it out best

Two thousand and eleven
was supposed to be my year
that's when you left me for him
and you thought everything we had
was just gonna be another fling
Girl, I don't play people
It's not my thing
I almost made the mistake
of letting you go
I could have left you in the dust
and moved on through this life
When the message I sent you
said I needed time to sought myself out
You replied with, Why? and laughed
I thought about every single word
put so much thought and effort
into every line, I said and sent you
They were the longest messages
I'd ever sent anyone
I'm not sure you gave a ****
Not sure you even care

I don't know
What I'm doing back
in the studio
Trying to make this song for you
So you see, feel what's going on
deep inside of me, what's been yearning
to be set free
and you didn't think I could communicate
like this, I'm full of surprises
What else can I say, so take the chance
allow me to explain
everything that's going on
deep inside of me

Uh, he acts like he owns your heart
But he doesn't know much about the art of love
And I'm not gonna let him
Tear what we have left apart
I'd fight for you, Die for you
I'd fight for everything we have left
so if you want this, you'd better start
showing me a little more interest
If you want me to stay
better say something
this is getting ridiculous
Can't read your mind, every single time
I'm tired of chasing, playing silly games
Girl, am I some sought of back up plan?
I need a little more respect
If you want me to invest
All this love I have for you
I'm taking a little more control
So if you don't want me anymore
Say something, so I can let go.

I don't know
What I'm doing back
in the studio
Trying to make this song for you
So you see, feel what's going on
deep inside of me, what's been yearning
to be set free
and you didn't think I could communicate
like this, I'm full of surprises
What else can I say, so take the chance
allow me to explain
everything that's going on
deep inside of me

I'm not some sought of hypocrite
Believing in every feeling that you're giving
So you better slow it down
Explain to me what you want to do now
Can't read your mind honey
Sometimes I need a little direction
I don't have the power of perception
stop playing me like a fool
Can't fight for someone
When they don't want to be fought for
What's the point of giving my all
To somebody that doesn't want me around no more
So show me a sign, that you want me around
I ain't playing second so I can be your rebound
someone you can bounce back off
so that you still feel wanted
because baby, I'm not somebody
you can just take for granted
I'll go and give another girl a chance
Because my hearts just not something
I'm willing to break again
Especially when you couldn't even give me a chance
To prove I had what it takes to be your man.

I don't know
What I'm doing back
in the studio
Trying to make this song for you
So you see, feel what's going on
deep inside of me, what's been yearning
to be set free
and you didn't think I could communicate
like this, I'm full of surprises
What else can I say, so take the chance
allow me to explain
everything that's going on
deep inside of me

©2018 Written By Benji James