Standing in the wind
wishing I could start agian,
but yet
I relize I can't.
I try to get up, or move, or walk,
but yet
I relize I can't.
Now they come to
terrorize me agian.
They grab me by the arm
and take me away once more.
But yet,
I dont undersand why.
They take me underground
to see their high master.
So they can decide my fate once more.
He took one look,
and smiled his evil smile,
and told the gaurds
to do the extreme to me.
I cry,scream, and try to tear my way out,
but only in my mind.
Because i relize
if I did it outloud,
I would surely die.
But yet,
something still came out
of my mouth once more.
Now the king
told them to do the extreme
plus more.
Now I've done it.
I've killed myself today.
I will not be able
to breath or live for another day.
They take me away
to where they will **** me today.
So now I wait
for my fate to come,
and start to pray.
They start to beat me,
and throw me agianst the rocks.
But I relize,
I do not feel any pain.
I feel strength growing
in my arms
and start to think
I can live another day.
But before they hit me agian,
a light shines.
It takes away
every drop of darkness
in the world.
A person comes down,
tells me to stand back,
and starts to fight
agianst them.
They flee in fright,
because of what is in their sight.
I really dont know why they ran,
but yet
I relize I didn't see the face of the man.
He turned around
and I instantly relized
this wasn't any ordinary man.
This was the lord, my savior,
the ruler of the light.
I could not beleive my sight.
He takes my hand,
and asks me to walk with him.
Then he takes me
out of here
to never go back agian.
He lifts me free,
and I am forever faithfull to him.
He takes me to his kingdom
where I am forever free.
To walk
and talk
and live worry free.
I can finally be in a greatfull peace.
I reize now,
I can finally start agian once more.

He opened the door as so many times befor the old man not giving thought to a stranger

inside in wait.

His smell gave him away even in the darkness it's always that moment just befor that

excite's me so.



As his feeble hands flicked the switch he gave no thought  to a intruder

he only cursed the light.

Godammit!  I just bought that bulb!

His voice like a memory lingred within my thoughts of hatred.



The mouse was in the vypers cage and I thrived in knowing the strike would

be savage in nature.

He stumbbled his way to the kitchen and as he was met by only the promise of more darkness it was then he would hear my hiss.



Hello Jim it's been so very long.

His eye's were so perfect in there grasp of terror for he knew the devil well.

Who's there? Get the hell outta my house I'll call the cops!



I couldnt hide my laughter Oh Jim how can you call the cops

When the phones dead besides didnt you miss me?

I dont know what your talking about who the hell are you?



The fear was a drug I knew his heart couldnt take much more but much like the phone he fumbled for it wasnt the only thing that would be left dead in this house.



He staggred back blind was the mose that soon would know my fangs.

My arms around wrapped around the weak old fool he let out a cry but I muffled it

with leather glove.



Oh dear uncle Jim dont you remember me?

You said I was always your favorite you sick ******* *******!

How many were there ?

What's wrong are you scared good you ******* freak!



I felt his body tremble  just as helpless as he had made me feel

You know old man it's only fitting I should **** you for so long ago you killed me.

His withred lips began to speak my name but soon he felt the sting and the

blood choked the sentance from his mouth.



His throat slit I let the old man crawl painting his kitchen floor a crimsom of pure devilish delight.

I dropped the phone in front of him and enjoyed as he in a last effort to survive

dialed the numders the gurgling noise a sweet music to my ears.



What's wrong Uncle Jim you seem so unhappy?

He convulsed in the floor I watched my creator die in such a beutiful demise.

The sound so sweet to hear my memories were washed clean my past was dead with the

wrinkled old garbage in floor I drove the blade in agian thats for the past you

I drove it in again thats for that helpless disgusting feeling of filth.



I drove it deeper agian and agian blood painted me i was washed clean of his decay.



How i love family get togathers

I call you my hero because all you did was save me and left.
*Im aching to see you agian one day.

I became
A traveler
Just so I could see the stars
I  left at sunset I flew out into space
Out in it's silence I saw the sun go flying by
Moving so quickly
I thought a moment but an hour had gone by

I saw in the distance
After years of planning led
Me to the conclusion
That a black hole was ahead
So I fly on for a while
Listening to numbered charts
Pushing the engines to the max
I fly on for awhile
Till I become a speck

I remeber you standing
Your wave was so fierce in that wind
Full of the meaning that I would always be alone
I'll never forget you
The last  human that I saw
Waving and crying
Telling me "You don't have to
fly alone"
But I fly on I fly on
With nothing but computers speaking in my head

At night I sit here
The radio plays white noise
Waiting for your voice agian
But I'm lost out in the dark

Your lying in bed agian
My picture still tacked to your wall
You won't say goodnight agian
You won't say anything at all
But your tears are a treasure
They can tear my life in two
I'm millions of miles
Away away from  you

Today I walked in from work
Making my way throught the strange and quiet house.
I couldn't understand when I walked into my room and saw you snuggled in my blanket
My bed has never looked so warm and so inviting
Your red hair spilling all over the pillows
Cascading into the shadow
I laid down fully dressed
Laying there in a dream
You are evreything that I will ever need
My best friend
pocketwatch
rain cloud
kissing booth

So strange to see your lips agian
Pursed and perfect
Red stained Beautiful

All so warm and simple
Not like the others
Her whole life is sweet and gentle

You can watch the parts of my life you touch
Turn away from the stoney lonesome
Your vines, your ivy, sweet smelling flowers
Wearing angel soft petals bloom in the pale moon

So what is left for me?
What more do I need?
I have my "Shelter from the Storm"

So
a long tired kiss is in order
on sleeping lips
soft and unkowing

Curling up in the warmth next to her
The flower wrapping her warm petals about me
I need nothing else in this world
As I begin to drift off into sleep so complete
A rustling on the bed beside me
Warm lips touch my ear
I hear her breathe "thank you"
and like that she left me there

I wake up alone
On this old couch
Sunlight creeping in through the broken blinds
In this trash apartment
In this nowhere town
Sober

If you saw me agian
Would it be as a friend
Or as a foe
Would our acquaintancship end
Or would it grow
I hurt you
You hurt me
I guess you were right
That we leave another be
So although I wish to know
if you are alright
We would be better
As two ships passing in the night

In many travels across this melting *** of a country I have found that every small town has it's own cast of characters every group has the ******* who cant handle
*****.
The party girl who gets crying and wishes she could start all over again.
And the one to busy living this life to give a **** about what you think or how your
feeling.

After a couple  of weeks it gets to anyone the sense of not belonging.
the constant movement  it eats away at you like rot gut whiskey.
Once even though in agony you so joyfully keep pouring down your throat.

And the conversations become the same are we but playing a game
saying whatever it takes to get what we want.
But what is it we truley want?

Comfort of a warm body by are side the feeling of flesh apon flesh.
It has to be more than just *** but out here I belive its to feel
what its like to benormal and for one moment pretend you wont  be
walking out that door to chase sun once agian.
Living like a pirate apon the land.

Not matter her body's warmth when you leave you never havea chance to
know the bad or the reallity of people.
thats why im forever a tourist.

Knotts Island  10:oo pm wedsday Feb  9   2011

It was like any other night spent at the doctors office slash
Dr Jerry's trailer.
Drink fine deep conversation about world events and *******.

I had went to the porch for some  introspection  and to take a ****.
Dear Lord Man!
What I saw was proof i had done way to many drugs and slipped yet into another rambling state of Gonzo.

White  powder covered the ground  it was a gift from Jesus or Elvis really   whats the diffrence?
Hunk a hunk burning  clap  it was pouring ******* from the sky !
I burst through the door like Lindsy Lohan fresh outta rehab

Jerry !  
Gonzo!  
Jerry!
Gonzo!
What are we yelling about Jerry?

I dont know but zip your pants up.
I know your a **** but I dont need to see it as proof.
Jerry a doctor a fellow brother of Gonzo
and true deep thinker.

****** man what was i gonna say i really need to lay off
the drink *******  Dr Pepper.
Well smack my **** and paint me purple and sell me to the Canadians.
dont ask.

Jerry good lord man look  outside its a true miricle.
Now only if it would rain strippers and wild turkey.
That would really be proof the easter bunny existed!

Jerry shaking his head for he knew his drugged out mental asylum bound  friend with a heart of gold or at least bronz  needed some alone
time in a padded cell looked out the window.

See i told you !
It's ******* snow Gonz ya *****.
snow what the hell's that I thought to myself while speaking
out load on a poetry site   where people think what the **** is wrong with him.

****** I should go outside more than once a year.
these seasons really throw me off like Skeeter  on
a cold night.
****** i told you  not untill you pay for last time ******!

She was a true lady just wish she took credit.
After a breif explanation time travel and where babies come from.
Dr Jerry returned to his favorite hobby surffing facebook
for underage *****  hey dont judge  how do ya think i met my wife?

Yeah man look at this one amigo sent me a friends request.
Jerry showed me a pic of a hot looking chick
and being she was good looking and talking to Jerry ment either
two things.

One the Gonzo On facebook page was down due to such high traffic
cause im super awsome.
Dork  you got like 14 friends.
Jerry went back to looking at the computer screen.
ha ha ha ha ha *** not funny.
Cyberperve!
I know you are but what am I?!

****** man he always get's me with his mature 40 something living
in his grandmas back yard  logic oh snap girlfriend.

Or Two  this little monkey  was really a ****** or a mormon
whats  the diffrence but enough with the foreplay children.
Jerry sat deep in thought and four **** hits and ten shots of turkey later sat the puzzled.

Amigo what do i say to break the ice?

The lights dimmed  a voice from the heavens spoke or New Jersy
John Tesh  apeared from the closet  ****** man i thought i herd really boring music from there i thought the rat poisen would get him for sure.      
    
When thought's are blured and both hands are busy.
When you just cant seem to find the words to break the
ice to that hot little hamster across the net,

Take that extension cord from around your neck and get
head out the oven dam you Slyvia Plath.
Just call dah da da dah da or however it ****** goes
sorry i dont watch   super hero movies although
I need a pair of thoose tights.
IT'S A JOB FOR GONZO.

Move aside silly girl I'll break the ice for you!
Umm  no Gonz thats okay Jerry replyed in that no
but it means  yes seductive five packs of cigs a day
sandpaper voice of his.

Trust me Jerry  Im a writer and i know how to
talk to the ladies  yes my friend how they do love Gonzo
Oh they pull out there pepper spray fire there guns
but inside they have a thirst for crazy.

No Gonz it's okay.
Dont mention it Jerry.
Gonz !
Jerry !
Gonz!
Jerry!
What the **** were we talking about and why the ****
are you in my lap!
Good question my friend but least your happy to see me.

At the keys the master or insane half wit began his
works of geinus this would break the ice for sure!

Dear Sarah

Wow all I can say is me likey.
And may I say that sweater really brings out your *******.
We should get togather and  talk  bout  things
while naked in bed to bare are souls.

Something about me.
My name is Jerry im  superbadass hells yeah.
I like drinking other peoples beer i can bench like a
thousand pounds.

I have a big   tv. What get your mind outta the gutter!
Lets drop the small talk you know ya want it why fight it.
Let that inner tigress out meow kitty  
Lets get naugthy and do things to make us both
purr in the litter box.

Kisses Dr Jerry   giggles and a gay *** emicon,
xoxoxo.

Yeah I know what your saying no wonder im such a ****.
And no wonder i have to pay for *** and im always alone.

After some mock tears and a snuggle   we waited for I know a
turned on little nymphs  reply.

Hey Kids it's  time to play are favorite snow game.
car surffing  in the blizzard cause im a drunken idiot
okay that kinda hurt.

Driving around the mean streets of KI  hopping officer
Rutherford was off duty or searching some drunk woman
looking for  some goodies hey I wonder where my sister is?

We at the rip roaring speed of 10 miles a hour What ?!
Hey saftey first that and the snow made it really hard for Jerry to hold onto the roof and pass the bottle.

We laughed we cried we lit are farts and made a beautiful
snow sculpture of two snow people getting freaky right in the middle of the road  hey kids blame it on the Beatles.

After we took out a few mail boxes stole a few garden gnomes
And taught a jaded soul how to love agian  we were
back at the office slash trailer in jerry's grandmas backyard
yes to think he's really come a long way since the tent.

By the warmth of the fire  music and fine drink to
match are deep conversation.

Hey dude ya think think that extenze stuff really works?
And if so if you took a lifetime supply  could you answer the door without getting outta bed?.      
        
The knock at the door was sudden.
****** man I knew it! Snow monkeys hide the
penut butter  and  put on some Kenny G!
Hey **** Kenny G  
Dam you John Tesh Go back into the closet where you belong!

Jerry looked at me as he usally does.
Like this ******* really needs some shock treatment.
Talk about a charge.

After Jerry assured me it wasnt the artic monkey's come to take there revenge   and promised to read me a bed time story what!
I have a inner child oh was starved of kickass stories.
Like Jack And The Beanstalk ,Catcher And The Rye,Or Debbie Does Dallas.

I opened the door to see a  large angry looking man
with a axe in his hand hmm dam lumber jacks  there always
on the job.

Are you the perve that wrote my 13 year old daughter that perverted
email on facebook?

Oh no im Gonzo im the other pervert who writes really long rambling stories on a a poetry website that arent really poetry
or very good,And drinks alot and doesnt make much sense

Yet always bring a laugh to demented people across the globe
cause yeah im super bad ***...

The man stood unfazed gritting his teeeth *******
me with his eyes hey it's cold okay.

Uhh no sir that's the perve your looking for over there
looking at your daughters pics hey ****** man we have
company  stop that.

I made my exit to the sound of screams it was like
a pit bull was latched onto a girl scout the agony    
Well looks like things were off to a good start Jerry was already meeting Sarahs  parent.

No need to thank me  Jerry
Remember kids if ya need a little help in time of need.
Look no further than Gonzo.

Slower than a fast moving virus.
He can leap small dwarfs and some short big girls in a single bound
kinda.

Gonzo fly's  of into the night in a epic soon to be forgotten.
B movie moment.
Stay Crazy.

Look Im flying.  **** tree!

Splat , Crash, Boom  Ouch Shitfire And Flying Monkeys
Next time I'll take a cab.

Adios Amigo's

let me take a break from all of this for awhile
ii’m much too sad to read you a story from my diary
i miss kissing you
i want to kiss you under the sun
i want to kiss you on the sun
i want to handcuff you and kiss you
i want to know how to kiss you
i want to write a book about kissing you
kissing you is a full time job
let me kiss you agian
i am so sorry
i died kissing you
and i don’t regret it
i am losing my mind and i don’t want to find it
i"m reall sorry i will pay for the damages
wow can we stop loving each other so much already
i am so inlove with you right now i could make all the spelliung mistokos in the
world and you would still understand me and i you could close our eyes and still
see how much love we have for each other anad i don’t even mind if it seems like
i’m not payinga ateetion because maybe this is the way things are supposed to
be and i can’t make anything perfect for you because i am not but if you know
then i bet you can we ever
maybe this is right
everything is amazing and it will all be destroyed
this is the most memorable moment i’ve had today
let’s walk through the water with our shoes on
i want to feel the mud between my toes
i’m trying to catch all the mosquitos i can find
people say i’m not saying anything but i am actually saying everything and if you
paid close attention you would notice that i am actually made of different flowers
i’m so cute when i kiss you because you make
me feel reall cute u are so cute and kissing you should be an olympic sport
because i would win a gold medal in kissing you for sure!
how about we talk for a minute

This feeling brings my face to show a slight red on the carmel surface
My eyes twitch and open and close rapidly
Who would have thought I would be nervous

You are not my first not even my second
but they were merely covers
you being my third are also my first in my mind

I can't foresee all that might come
The road might me bumpy
It might contain some curves real steep curves
Or it might be smooth as a baby's bottom

I don't know what I might feel
But I am willing to jump in
For I am that type of guy
Who goes ahead pluges head first ignoring the waring sign

I will be honest with you though
If what we have doesnt feel right to me I will say
and If I do feel like it should last forever  ditto
For you deserve the truth no matter what

So as the days start to dwindle to when we can see each other agian
One feeling is all I have
I am Nervous

America, the beautiful...

do you see what I see?

A country stuck on life support

A dead economy?

America, America...

.please take a breath for me

Ford, GM and Chrysler

Are no longer the big three

Our plants are closed

Our dollar *****

the Dow Jones is joke

Our people can't afford to live

Our dreams went up in smoke

America, America

You'll come back once again

But now you're flat upon your back

On an eight count out of ten

Your soldiers fight, For what is right

On shores so far away

There's battles that need fighting though

Inside the USA

America, America

Please get up off your knees

Most of what we buy from you

Is made by the chinese

Your country has come back before

We're sure that you'll be fine

Recovery won't happen fast

Your eight count's up to nine

America, America

Before they count you out

Stand up and yell

without a doubt

We'll triumph once again.

We'd love to hear Kate Smith once more

Sing out about how great

America can be agian, Before it is too late

America, America

God Shed his Grace on Thee

And crown thy good with brotherhood

From Sea to Shining Sea.

you are gone agian this time for two weeks
and for what?
For Skipping class for HIM, that guy you say you don't like
You say you are not gay or even Bi and yet you spend time with him

I am glad you got caught
you know why?
Cause it is your punishment for all the wrong you have done
Never learning from your mistakes
For playing with my heart
For the things you have done to your sister
for the things you have done To yourself

I feel like I should just give up on you
Just leave you alone and forget
But My heart cries out no
My mind says no
My body says no
Eveything cries out no

I love you ,you stupid ,cant you see
I shed tears when i found out
I dont know if i can handle it
You told Her, Sam,  that you cut yourself for her
and you know what i saw
A girl who doesnt care for you
She rolled her eyes and they screamed " I dont care"
But guess what I do

I care if you cry
I care if you get hurt
I care if you hurt yourself
I care IF you get Suspeneded
I Care with ever fiber of my being
But it seems that you don't

WHY?????

..Who’s ana?
Ana…. why, ana is something special.
no one can hear anna or see ana but me.
Anorexia Ana.
My mom say’s i'm ill...and that Ana is the reason i have guilt…
but i still take Ana’s suicide pill.
She say’s skip dinner, you’ll be thinner, skinnier
thinner.
skinnier….how she desired to conspire and let Ana rewire her...but she was too blind to see that shes a liar.
she didnt know, it acquired diet pills and that as her blood spills, she would think she would be like the beverly hill models…
but little did she know, what she was remodeling.
it wasnt enough…
never good enough…
shes had enough… when will she feel like she’s good enough?

skinnier..
thinner…
Ana wants to be the winner, and so far, shes devouring the inner beauty of a teenage girl.
but darling...what she didnt know, that the search for perfection would **** her.
days go by…..she becomes weaker…..people call her a pleasure seeker when they dont see her on the school bleachers.
the teachers worry, and even the preachers in the church of god still nod and pray to god she wont earn a pair of wings too soon.
her scale that whispers “you’re 90...and still not tiny.”
weeks go by, fragile like a antique….while her tiny body i oblique.
shes cold….but shes proud.
shes proud of the gap between her thighs and how her jean size doesnt show her ***** secret that underlies.
she cries, her body shuddering, her hearts fluttering…..shes suffering…
Anna says “keep pushing. if you want to be skinnier, and thinner. slender and bony only.”
the world bowed down thier heads in shame. shame to the family name.
you’ll go to bed hungry tonight,
telling yourself you dont need to eat.
ana’s telling you that you’re fat agian
that you’re imperfect,
from your eyes down to your feet.
you’d think you’d feel beautiful,
because look; you’re finally thin
though your not skinny yet, and you wont be until you see the danger that you are in.
even then it wont be enough,
because beauty is a drug, and addiction is tough…..she refuses to see ana is making her life tough….but she see’s that when the scale drops, ana says “fair enough”
a 15 year old girl with a lifeless 70 pound body, and still doesnt think she has “thea perfect body”.
bony ribs, and a pointy hip bones…..“she looks like a bag of bones”
as if sticks and stones would describe her mental break downs ….
but she never makes a sound…. Ana says “now you’re hell bound. dont make a sound ….now you belong in a hole in the ground…..ive win and you’re mine now.”
she called Ana, her friend. she was one of the few. she saw in her things that no one knew.

but before she knew, when she knew she couldnt break through,
when she couldnt pull through,
she withdrew her cold poor soul ….and was now in gods view.

Look at your torn fingers
Wrapping around transparent love
Grasping at what you perceive as real
Based on fear of losing everything
You could not bare the endless possibilities
That reside in your flawed mind
Speaking foreign languages of false gods
Cupids illusion for perfect hearts
The perfect rendition of serenity
Yet we are all flawed
Radioactive identities in the ***** hands of death himself
Pleading... praying for a drip of pure water to let my demons go
To help me see a vivid love once agian

Travelers of ancient times define pathways as divine temptations
Paths that can lead a flock of lambs to kingdom come or to a deathly sun
Blind eyes could see the words
Etched deep inside stone tablets
Jehovah be of golden truth
He envisions all likes of love
That wills me to make my fingers bleed
And grasp what i can not see
For faith be the only reason why

I know its real

I went to the airport today , as my mom was traveling I was there my sister ,my father and we kept doing our goodbyes as my father expressed how much he will miss her about 10 times .. even though she's coming back in a week.
While I was sitting there a man caught my eye he was with a lady a smaller asian lady , she was dressed very simply looks like she doesn't have much, her hair was messy .. she doesn't seem to care about how she looks , he was pushing her from her hand joint and not her actual hand .. his grip firm .. like she was a stray dog and he was containing her from runing wild . He was dressed more decently and he seemed from the gulf and he  seemed like he wanted to get this over with .. he kept pushing her as my eyes involuntarily followed their every move he had a passport in his hand seemed hers and a small bag .. no luggage.
I saw her passing throught the    checkpoints and I lost them for a while Finally it was time to leave my mom at the check point where only the travelers can pass .. that's when I saw that lady again and the security was behind her again guiding her like a stray puppy to the man who happened to be next to me .. the security handed her over to the man who didn't seem so happy to see her again as the security said " the captin won't allow her on his flight like this, she needs to wake up from whatever she's in" ... that's when I lost them again as my mother was waving to us the final wave I got occupied by waving back and then watched her leave .finally we decided to leave the airport and for the last time I found the lady agian sitting alone starring into the ground her head waving back and forth like her neck was not strong enough to hold her head .. as I saw the man leaving the airport door with a key in his hand .. he left the bag and passport with her and left .. and we left too
But she stayed there
Unaware and rejected
lost but no one was searching

Walk beside me and lets take a stroll. Lets talk about you, me, and life as a whole. Lets talk about logic, emotions, and fears. Lets talk about movies, food, and those things that bring you to tears. Lets walk for hours, so the sun can take a rest; circling this world from east to west. And lets only rest when our legs grow old and week, and when lifes path has no more steps for us to seek. Lets skip for a while and act like kids again, remembering those carefree times way back when. A time of peace, with not a care in the world. A time when lifes path seemed to come unfurled. Right before our eyes, with no struggle at all. No where to trip, stumble, or even take a bad fall. No ledges to climb and no rivers to swim, no valleys or mountains that look too grim. So lets walk through those flowery fields of sunshine. Laughing and singing with our hands intertwine. But our lovable time is met with ice breath, as we walk through the valley of the shadow of death. The strains of life to real for us to miss, forgetting the time of our childish bliss. Stuggling with life and even one another, wondering if this road will continue for much farther. Holding each other with full apprehension, afraid this embrace will end from the sheer tension. Brought on to challenge everything held so true, found in moments of passion had between me and you. Holding on for dear life, with everything at stake. Holding you so tight as to feel your soul shake. And as we weather the storm and walk through the haze. We praising ourselves for getting through that pahse. In this journey of two paths that have seemed to collide; destiny putting two souls in perfect stride. Walking with hands and souls intertwined, agian like before life became unkind. This new path stretching with so much potential, a new piece in my life that has become so essential. To my very survival and way of life; without it my life defined by pure strife. And we walk on our beaten path with no moon in sight, the sun still at rest from its never ending flight. From east to west and west to east; time and direction not important in the least. For as long as im with you my love will be timeless, even when our lives our put in distress. I promise you this untill the day i die. When i must leave this world to meet my maker in the sky. And when ours souls are together and reunited once again, i will remind you of our path where love had once began.

The rough texture of your palms Lingers on my fingertips.
Your enchanting laugh rings in my ears.
You were my protecter.
My hero.
It was far to soon for u to Hang up your cape.
5 longs years spiral out of control in a matter of days.
Feeling Your smile fading in my eyes hour by hour. I begged for your life.
But god turned his back on my selfish pleas.
I am told it all happens for a reason, But I can find no reasoning in a father being torn from his family far before his time.
Cancer doesn't rip apart familys for a reason.
Daughters arnt ment to watch there father slip away for a reason.
I would have sold my soul for one last hug, To hear your voice agian.
My father stolen from me by The venom that corsed in his veins.
Life is to fickle to appreciate. But I sware if I could have had one last phone call I could renue my lust to live. I could step out of this seemingly endless revolving door.
With you gone the house is Hallow.
We are Hallow.
You left us frightfully stumbling through a mirror maze.
You were the light to guide me home. But I am left a shell of a daughter craving for one more minute Of life in you.
I see You in my dreams, A moment of comfort in your presence that leaves me bitter an hurt when I wake.
I write to you everyday knowing there just words lost in the wind.
You sculpted me into a broken masterpiece and left me unfinished.
Left a hole in me that can never seem to be filled.
Well u laid in the hospital bed with the cold cloth i had placed on your head i felt as tho i was a young child agian longing to crawl up in your lap an have you tell me everytging was going to be ok.
My tears seem Dried  an i cant kick start my heart.
The lights on life dimmed by your absence.
Everywhere i turn i see you.
Raw an open, I miss you So much words could not descride.
Please.
Please.
Come home daddy

That pain you feel inside
The rage wanting to escape
But how
How do we escape
Is it possible?

That person you thought you knew
Stabbing you in the back
Over and over
But why do we stay?

The fear of being turned down
If we befriend once,
Will it happen agian?
So we must stay to protect our future
The pain we put aside must stay their
Remain their
And mustn't show
We must act normall

We stay in fear
Hoping you will realize
And leave first
Because after all you call me your true
Friend
the only one who cares
Tut that's not true
I'm your caged animal
Wishing to escape any chance I get
But deep inside I know the chance will, never come
Untill they move on

Bar dreams came dripping in
Beer bottles a headrest
Towers of bottles tops for weary eyes
Moonlight will capture my tries
Morning light will fill my demise

Wake me up when my mind stops raining
Flooding the gate of pain
Hurtful shadows taking my sane
Peaceful remedies go down the drain
Love always forgeting my name

Goodbye says the sun
The sky fell asleep all over agian
So did the smile from her eyes
All I see is frostbitten grass
Talk to the light while dusk tries to pass
Make your way to the end of all wars
Dont look down
Dont you fall to the floor
Someone has to remember my name
The stars remember nothing
When clouds drift ahead
While misty liqueur came making me drunk
I awake and I'm lost in my mind
I have taken the last of my time
I end up escaping the murderous fiends
I'm always hating these midnight bar dreams

My heart was always just for one,
But now it seems it wants to have some fun.
Im falling deeply in love with one while he might like another,
So we're having conversation undercover.
Only will said other date me if I go to his school,
So now I wanna transper but I might look like a hopless fool.
For I found the true love of my heart,
Hoping he wont leave me agian and this time we can have a master piece of art.

I see you agian
In your soft fragile beauty
A  new orchid pale
But I see in your eyes sadness
The ache in a spiders legs
As it crawls to the center of its web
A cold breeze tossing it upon a sea
A fresh look of terror
Shivering in the moonlight
You haunt my dreams
I am ****** to a life of silence
A cold shiver in my limbs
A cold shiver in my limbs

I met her
It was under the star light
She then lifted her *******
And we then both spent the night
We then loved
On and on
with no end
Until we had to stop
We both knew we had lives apart
She was my friend
And we both knew if this started
That surly would end
We chose lust and passion
Over Being friends
We went back to lusting
Agian knowing the passion
Was burning between as such
Much of us were given that night
And now it's been every night since
We both go on together
With touch
I touch her on top of her skin
Smoothly gliding
Ready for me to give in
She then touches me back
And responding given
So we both join together like one
We both break away until
the daylight of the sun
We both know we chose lust
And our friendship is done

this message is brought
by those who fought
for lover's lane is now a vacant lot

I heard that at it's birth
lover's lane encompassed the earth
like a grand equator
the ultimate curator
of all things love
but then a dark mass came from above
it was a ball of cynism
and under the haze of malaise
created a schism

then like ripples in a pond
the schism ripped at the bond
that held lover's lane together
maybe it was cynism that allowed the darkness to see
that lover's lane was only real,
because of ideals held within you and me

the darkness knew it's route
was to first take root in the minds of the people
then gives it's followers the suit
and make the corporation it's steeple

the suits were faithful to their creed
called the gospel of greed
yet there was still a need
that they had to feed
happiness
that money could not buy
and believe me they would try
and try, and try
and try

deep down their apathy
was agony
happiness the supreme ideal
but all they wanted was to feel
anything
they went to their vices
such as cellular devices
that created a virtual reality
that could make them virtually happy
for once they could virtually say
they were virtually ok
virtually
not in reality
the reality was they were desperately trying to forget
they were sardines trapped in the net

the net was growing too
misery likes company
but really loves a corporation
but what were we to do?
it had spread across the nations
lover's lane was shrinking
all we were thinking
was could love ever thrive agian?
could it even survive? when...
the darkness was so thorough
containing lover's lane to merely a borough

we tried to make them see
all that love can be
we tried with all forms of art
wrote, and spoke from the heart
but the suits were indifferent
they just didn't care
I realized then and there
that I'd be just one of the few numerals
at loves eminent funeral
wearing a suit
and after a tear, I'd start my commute
to be the corporation's next recruit

Blubber
Sometimes I get tired
Of all the blubber
The grinding of systems
The metal to the rubber

The pushing of points
The singing to the choir
Pickaxe in place of featherc
Look there's a bird upon the wire

Maybe potions going dry
No thank you please
And fingers going all stiff
While here awaits the feast

And vases laying all smashed
Words sitting there all torn
Lets gather the broken scraps
Rearrange them and be reborn

Maybe it's me and only me
Closing an old and tattered page
Maybe I've overstayed my welcome
On an old and creaky stage

Ah the sticks an stones are smiling now
The crows I think they've left
But the cinders upon ash
Still burn bright upon this hearth

Out into the clearing
See it twinkling up ahead
An inkling of some something
Some of us have thought of and said

Merlin's done it agian
Con-Ed's shut down
Tesla's come into power
And White Bear gets his crown
Oh
And
George Carlin is pope
Shakespeare is president
They both know the ropes
And you what ya think?
Wink, wink

I wasnt supposed to but we went out running anyway. Call me an adulteress, it doesnt matter by now. Ill never reach these places with him that I do here. Here the wine flows down our throats and the wind rips down our hair and backs. And yes for the millionth time we live out fantasies that in others just lay there
dormant in their coffins for etertinity
my heart is an explosion
of a million tiny rhapsodies
racing around the planets
landing for moments
on thoughts
on animals
on stars and on
trees
and on grass
but pounding in my chest and with
ur heart
all at the same time.
You grab my hand and we are at once
scaling the wall less edges of
the scorching sun
and sitting meaninglessly here
in these moments
i want a song written just for me
i want to frolic among a trillion dandelions
in purple linen dresses
u and me
i want the sun to laugh raining and kissing down our necks and backs
it will be a fantasy
we will be friends
soaking up moments like hawaiian punch
delightfully and lustily
and you will sing a song and give it to me
and when you are done it will sing over agian
and we will never be done hearing it
and we will know
I and He