I decided
to set some goals

Goals I want to reach 'till the end of this year
even though I hate stuff like that

but I felt like
I need to give myself a time limit
I need to force myself

Otherwise,
I'll never reach those goals

I set them for me
Not for you
Not for him
Not for her

Only for my own well being
for my own happiness
simply for my own.

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” -He asks

“No. I do not”- I say

“Why not?” -He asks again.

(Because falling in love at first sight is like falling in love with an appearance. The hair, the eyes, the body may all be perfect. But what about who’s on the inside. Such things are not gonna matter for the rest of our lives. Will you not love them when you see the flaws? Will you not love them when they are a mess?  Will you not love them when they aren’t as perfect anymore? As if their looks could show me who they really are. I don’t need such superficial love.) - I think

“I don't know.”- I say.

You know those films on movies where they flip the table
Throw things around and scream obscenities at everyone
Well this is exactly what I would do,if my life was a movie
Instead I the prey sit here hiding all the anger trapped inside
Instead I the prey take a walk stay silent taming it all in
Instead I the prey fall prey every time to the predators bait

You know that feeling you get when you are disgusted by yourself
Trying to conjure up where everything went wrong?
How you can change things?
What to do not to repeat the same mistake?
When you finally think I got this,you repeat the same thing
Only to get things actually have gotten worse
Well that feeling of disgust is not funny

You know that feeling you get when realize how naive you've been
When you realize all the anger that you have is because:
You just couldn't let go
You held onto your ideas so strongly,you couldn't see the others
You loved someone to much but didn't love an ounce of yourself
You listened to all the negative people
You felt all the negative energy and let it consume you
Yeah well I can tell you how pathetic and joyful realizing that will make you feel

I put you on top
So far up there
When I need you the most
When I come to collect my fingers caught ***** first,
Then I stretched a little further and got hate
I stretched a little further and got unfaithfulness
I stretched and got pain so much pain and anger
When I almost gave up I got me back with a sprinkle of wisdom
So I'll give you this I love you always will
Even though you shattered me
Though I love you more because you dear
Returned me back with a sprinkle of wisdom

Once upon a time we had it all
Somewhere down the line we went and lost it
One brick at a time we watched it fall
I'm broken here tonight and Darling no one else can fix me
Only You