The world is teetering
Tethered by a withered string
And gravity is pulling it taught

And now it’s crashing
Louder and louder
The shards splinter my skin
And rivulets of blood
Turns to rivers

You hear a sigh
Of relief
Of regret
Of release
As you find me
Drowning in a pool of my blood

You say that I’ve changed,
I’m simply not the same.
A stranger that stole
Your little sisters face.
What a disgrace,
To be so misplaced.
But tell me dear siblings,
How would you know?
You never see me.
I have bent over backwards
All for you.
My “loving” family,
I have broken my heart
Again and again
On the cold steel of your eyes.
I have choked on the storm
Of your torrent of lies.
I have cut myself open
And poured my blood all over
the razor whip of your cruel words.
I have cried for you
I have died  inside for you
And when you were jealous,
because I could fly
I let you tear off my wings
And chain me to the ground.
Because I was told your love
Had to be earned
I did everything you asked of me.
I gave you my everything
And then a little more
Only to hear you demand for more.
Your eyes stayed cold
And words cut deeper still
I froze from your gaze
And collapsed from the blood loss
And you were insulted
And as you broke me
You laughed when you snapped me in two
Then left me behind,
As you always do.
You expect me to take the pain
And rise once more
On trembling limbs
To trail on after you
So you can break me some more.
You demand I be there should you have the need
To always be willing to let you watch me bleed.
And yet you claim that It is I,
Who has changed,
That I am simply not the same.
A stranger that stole
Your little sisters face.
And as I lay bleeding
I realized you were leeching
The life from my soul
And I felt the betrayal swallow me whole
I gasp for air,
Running out of breath
From the noose of expectations
You’ve tied round my neck.

For a moment today...
my heart stopped.

When I was a little girl I stood in awe,
Before the beauty that was Notre Dame.
It was only a picture,
but in it I saw the marvel that was Notre Dame.

And so as a girl I dreamed
To feel her bells reverberate through my soul,
To draw her beauty with inadequate talent
To one day stand before grand Notre Dame.

And now she is burning.
Dressed in red
Her heart is on fire
as the flames hungrily sought to accomplish
that which two wars and a plague could not,
To consume beloved Notre Dame.

856 years she has witnessed
856 years her regal beauty has graced us
856 years Her bells have sounded for so many souls

And in what seemed like seconds
Notre Dame...

Is gone.

The trembling ash coated skeleton
of her existence is all that remains
of the glory that was Notre Dame

And if you are silent you may still hear the bells
ringing through out the earth,
crying for Notre Dame.
And now as she goes in a blaze of beauty..
I too cry for Notre Dame.

for a moment today...
my heart stopped.

and as I behold that what is left
of the burning heart of Paris..
I am unsure it will start again.

I feel so foggy
Limbs feel heavy
Thoughts feel thick
Eyelids stick
I don’t feel sick
So it must be ok..
No matter the way
Self medicate
To placate
This morbid mirror
This demonic fear