i am not the kind of sick
that leaves the body flushed
at 104 degrees
in the middle of the winter.
i am not the kind of sick
that causes every breath
to force
its way
back up
your throat
while dragging razor blades
along the inside of your neck.
i am not even the kind of sick
that comes with a vaccination
or an antibiotic
that will chase it away.
no.
i am the kind of sick
that leaves you locked in
the bathroom during class
because you can't seem to stop the
flow of tears
running
down
your face.
i am the kind of sick
that leaves your hands
sweating
and your voice
shaking
when it's your turn to order dinner
at the diner you've been to
a thousand times.
i am the kind of sick
that leaves you feeling
l o n e l y
in a crowded room
filled with the people you've
known your whole life.
i am the kind of sick that nobody sees
because it's all in my head
and cannot be cured.
mental health is just as important as physical health. take care of yourself.