I walk a ghost among the mourners,
plucking stitch
after stitch
into my own burial shroud

—with a rose
tucked into the sleeve

as though one day,
a dedicated love might find itself here

there’s this boy who looks like my first celebrity crush
he’s taken by a beautiful girl
with cherry painted lips and a golden smile
oh, what i would give
to get lost in the labyrinth of blossoming love
to hear the accordion singing its recycled cheesy song
but it dives and curls and the wind is blowing in a strange manner
exhausted feelings catch up to me

there’s this boy who makes me scared for my soul because i like him so, but i’ve never met him
that’s how all my love songs go
nobody ever realizes
nobody ever knows
they always slip through my sweaty fingers
and their deep voices just become shallow echoes

there’s this boy who is the star in every show

there’s always the side character who pines
and never gets loved
it hurts to be so empty

I cannot feel love
only the grief
it left me with

I am grieving
all-night long

He shouts, cause there was a time when he wasn't loud enough.

He pushes people away, cause there was a time when someone hurt him.

He doesn't trust anyone, cause there was a time when someone broke that trust.

He's quiet, cause he's sick of being unheard.

He wants to be praised cause someone didn't value him enough.

He loves more, cause he was loved less once.

Call my name,
see the ghost of the past I became.

Of this world, I am lost in the shadow
left to feed off the old war’s debris.
It’s too big for an innocent child
that is forced to grow up, don’t you see?

In the village, I walk unnoticed –
every grownup stares right through me.
On my tasks, I try to stay focused,
while the one thing I want is to scream.

Scream out loud at the people, the street
to be heard for a second, be seen.
In this world, do I even exist?
How, a child, would I even know this?

Call my name,
bring me back to the living, again.