Yesterday
I was too much
Too loud
Too crazy
Too loving
Too confident
Too open
Too happy
You didn’t like it
So today
I am nothing at all

I'm slowly losing my emotions.

As everyone always told me.

I used to
laugh
cry
and everyone always told me it's too much.
Too much of this and that.

They told me,
they could never imagine me,
to love someone
to be romantic
to be this kind of girl.

They told me,
that I am
a cold-hearted
a emotionless
a stone cold *****.

Always too much or too less,
never enough.
I'm simply never enough,
not enough of this and that.

Do you really wonder why,
I'm sick of showing emotions?

Too slow in this fast-paced world
Too dumb among the smart people
Too simple yet living in complications
Am I bound to be like this?
Can I even cope up?

I used to wonder how people fell asleep in class
Now I wonder how they stay awake

I used to wonder how people failed their classes
Now I wonder how they pass

I used to wonder how people were alone
Now I wonder how they have so many friends

I used to wonder how people were sad
Now I wonder how to be happy

I used to wonder why people cut
Now I wonder how they live without self harm

I used to wonder what it's like to stay up late
Now I wonder what'd it be like to sleep enough

I used to wonder how they thought something was wrong with school
Now I wonder how somebody sees something right

I used to wonder how people want to die
Now I wonder how they stay alive

Please, just please
Put me out of my misery
I can't stand existence
I didn't ask for this ****

Why, oh why, must I be
Put me out of my misery
Slit wrist or a noose around my neck
I'm almost ready, but not yet

A straw, a brick
A hug, a kiss
Poisoned thoughts
I've had enough of this

Broken backs, broken dreams
You have no idea what I've done, and what I've seen
I cannot end it, because I deserve this pain
I'm a loser and hate the game

Purge my soul
Break my bones
Leave me broken
Or send me home