An old mind,
from thinking,
tired eyes,
from crying,
a bleached heart,
from trying,
all the symptoms of a lover.

Ever since you left
I don’t know what to do but I’m surprised I haven’t ran
I don’t know what comes next
I can still feel your hands
Must be muscle memory
Perhaps a new feeling for nerve endings
I’m lost, you caught me in a trance
I can’t deal with it, true
I want to hold you
I need your touch, how lovely that would be
I want to hold your hands and hear you love me
You make my heartbeat dance and skip a beat
I could talk to you for hours
Remember the night you got me flowers
It was as sweet as the blush wine
I poured for us both
I’m missing you the most
And without your hands in mine
It’s phantom pain and I don’t mean to whine

Are you still there?
Always said I wouldn’t beg for you to talk to me
But here we are, do you even care?
Put yourself in my shoes and try to see
Where I’m coming from
Love is in the air and I want some


Your hands, I want to hold
All this waiting is getting old
I know I’m broken
It’s been a while since we’ve spoken
Did I mention that I need to hold your hand?
****, you’ve got me stuck in a trance
I love you, do you love me?
I guess we will wait more and see
Hours pass by, I remember your beautiful eyes
I beg you please be done with all your lies
So, I can truly love you like nobody else
Don’t get the idea that I won’t love myself
No lies
You would be one of my hardest goodbyes
I’m tired and don’t want to wast any time
I love you
Promise you, my words are true.

I remember the last time I walked to your house,
in my headphones, a song by the cure
‘The cure’.. A bit ironic, I thought
Cause I was so sick
So, so, sick,
of loving
you.

Splashes of colour
I've never felt duller
Seeing through my rose-tinted glasses
I never saw the red flags
My heart now carries these heavy bags
My feelings torn to rags
Bright and red
I feel sick
Hit with a rose coloured brick
Red and bright
All flags insight
I squeeze my eyes tight
Wishing everything was alright
~4/5/21