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I would have moved mountains.
I would have drowned my light in your motionless fountains.
Burned alive your imposters.
And sacrificed angels for your dark twisted monsters.

But you made me believe that the monster was me.
So I let you down just to let the Beast free..
Sunsets I feel
tend to reveal
how enchanting is life
in its truest and real..
How do you see right through me,
clear glass -
tell me where do I hide
all these feelings,
the sparks?
Tell me how to stop this fire
turning me to ash,
because every time you come closer
I crumble to dust.
I found myself alone and astray
in drunk Chardonnay bliss,
after the games and the chase
and a complete strangers’ kiss,
hating myself for loudly admitting..
..that it’s you I incessantly miss.
i miss you so much
I climbed up the third nearest hill
to watch the sun set,
on the day that you said
you love me..
Alone before sundown with time to spare.

I hoped to catch it amber and full,
on a hungry mid-cycle race all the way up there -
where exactly, I did not seem to care.
You disarmed me.
And on trial I were.

Alas my time wasn't worth it.
The sun hid behind thick layers of cloud,
the wind picked up and I could sense the rain coming.
It kissed me.
A bypassing train covered all other sound.

And to think I quite longed to hear this,
as if I didn't already know.
The forces of nature felt like an omen.
A warning,
against a tempting last straw.

Not sure how long I ended up sat there,
but Venus rose up to wish me goodnight.
If this is a test,
I’m determined to pass it.
An omen at half-light always means no.
Today I recalled the words of my father
stood at the door dignified, as he was.
Wasting my time writing lines, he said I was,
behind dusty old glasses from a hard day’s work.
If only I had refused to succumb
to decades of doubting my very self-worth
since that heart-stopping moment deep in my mind’s mines
Now how great a Poet could I have become?
It's strange to think I remained silent
for all of twenty nine years
till recently all of a sudden
words overflow me more than my tears.
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