Blood sweat tears…

These are the juices of my creativity
My very own  muse
Rock bottom and I have met quite often
And I scrapped climbing back up
I get tired and perspire cos its really deep
Deep to lose a friend
Deep to fail again and again
So in my frustration my eyes will leak
And the future will seem bleak
Blood sweat tears
I should hate you but i don’t
In fact your flow reminds me of just how weak I am and just how strong He is
Your flow clears my eyes to see
Your flow makes me sad
But these floors at rock bottom hold countless wisdoms and learning
I do not grasp them always or immediately but when I do I never forget them
Blood sweat tears
Flow
Flow freely

When you think you have seen it all,
When you believe nothing worse could ever happen.
When you think, "How could my life get crazier?"

STOP
PaUsE
Think again...

As soon as you think you've hit rock bottom,
As soon as you think you've seen it all...

Someone comes down the mine shaft, with a jackhammer in hand,
Breaking through a barrier,
*you thought could never be penetrated.

A husk, a shadow,
a memory now weak.
A place to avoid,
a number to delete.
A face to forget,
a life given up.
A name to erase,
etched into your skull.
A myriad of hopes
to remember as dreams.
A time spent alone
to weaken the seams.

A reason to drink.
A reason to cry.
A reason to laugh.
A reason to lie.
A past to detest,
a loss to accept.
A reason to bruise
to soften the truth.
An excuse to abuse;
a home to lose.

i went outside for a walk
took a shower when i got in

(we're not going to talk
about how i slept until
eleven and went back to
bed from one to four)

calluses coming back
to the bottoms of my feet
and those scabs and sores
on my scalp again

i tried to lower my
own standards
because i wasn't able
to meet them today

(but that leaves me
feeling like i've failed)

and i don't know how
to say what's on my mind

(i think i've hit
rock bottom
but if i made it to here
i could probably go lower)

sleep deprivation is
absolutely natural
because nothing feels real
even when i'm rested

(help)

i'm incredibly sorry
for most things i do

*(never mind.)

Who's to say
that tomorrow, you'll be any more ready than you were yesterday
that soon enough your demons will be gone and nothing will hold you back
or even circumstances will be different

Stop waiting for life to change as an opportunity to change your life
you can not hold it off, much longer
it must come from you first