I should’ve known how this would end
We played the part of distant friends
And I knew it’d hurt like a metal fist
A strong uppercut that almost missed
You should’ve seen my hand the other day
Shaking and trembling like a rusty train
When it comes and goes in a fiery blaze
Lungs burn, stomach turns, this must be fate
I’m calling around for a saving grace
And with two bruised knees, I’ll try to pray
What was that thing you said to my face?
Honey, you’ll find love, but not today
And I never wore a frown very well
But it’s been hard, if you couldn’t tell
It’s not even summer and I already fell
I’ll buy any hope that you try to sell

I know you’ll just be okay
When you work
Till your whole being shivers
With exhaustion
And your eyes cloud
With salty perspiration
And you push yourself
Into that one last lap
And keep pushing for another-
And yet another.
I know you won’t fall;
That much faith is essential.
And, wherever you trip,
You don’t tread on again.
With all those lessons
You’ve learned on your way,
You know you’ll just be okay.

Love is a dangerous game
That I don’t know how to play
Sometimes I wish you never came
Sometimes than I think I’d be okay
You have the sun In your eyes
And i the moon
Too bad you spill nothing but lies
Maybe I just let you in too soon
For you are the sun
And I am the moon

My mental health is not doing okay.
I’m not doing okay.
But i pretend I’m okay.
I’ll be okay.
Probably.
Hopefully.
Maybe.
I’m fine.
It’s fine.
Everything is fine.

It's not the end of the world.
It's not even the end of the day.
Just because the sky is gray
Doesn't mean the sun can't come out
As if to say "it's okay."
Remember. We see the world in color.
If you don't like the ones you see,
Just close your eyes and breathe.
Please don't give up, and I promise you'll see it's not the end.

I look up at the sky
And cry

Every night I hope this is some sick dream
That life isn't what it seems

I lost myself that day  
When you went away

I hid it well
Mommy and Daddy could never tell

I have a flashback in my mind every time
I see a cigar or a gold watch or even a cross necklace

You are constantly playing in the background of my brain like a movie that is up too loud and I am on the phone with my boss but can’t find the remote to turn it down

I googled how to let go
I realized that I can’t let go if I don’t want you to leave

I can’t turn raw pain into an elegantly worded piece of literature
I tried it's evident exactly where my heart broke

It visually depicted  exactly when my tears start to stream down my face

If you look close enough

I am drowning in a pit of false happyness and fake hope

Hey darling

Look at me

It's all okay

Don't be afraid

I've got this

I can do this

You can do this

Together we can do this

I've got you

You've got me

God has us both

Let's keep going

Don't give up

Hey, come on

you looked into my eyes which always seemed to remind you of the ocean. you said your dad never told you that you may drown while admiring the waves, your smile said not being able to breathe would be worth it. I thought about how you’re like the ocean breeze, giving breath to tired lungs. you swirl the sea, placing troubled minds at ease. you built sandcastles with your voice which I began to call home but it’s quiet now, all I can hear is a tsunami and I can’t seem to catch my breath