Something Beautiful After

I didn’t expect to want again. Touch had become a memory, a ghost I nodded to in passing—familiar, but too far.

Then you walked in like a secret I didn’t know I was still allowed to want. Not loud. Not demanding. Just sure.

Your hands didn’t ask questions—they knew answers. Like they’d waited their whole life
to map this skin I’d buried under silence.

You kissed me like it wasn’t a reward, but a right—like you’d earned it just by seeing me
and staying.
Staying when I trembled.
Staying when I burned.

This isn’t a rebound.
This is a rise.

There’s something holy in how you undress me—not just my body, but the layers I kept hidden even from myself.

With you, it isn’t just passion—it’s permission.

To want.
To ache.
To feel everything again.
Lips like an offering.
Fingers like truth.
Breathless doesn’t mean broken anymore.

You don’t heal me—you remind me I’m already healing. That I’m not ruined, I’m ripe.

And now—now I know the difference between being needed and being wanted.
And God, you want me. Like fire wants air. Like night wants skin. Like I want you—with everything I was once afraid to give.

© 2025 Shawn Oen. All rights reserved.

i carry wounds like fragile glass
smoothed edges but sharp in secret places,
ghostly seams from a lover who left me hollow.

and now there’s him.
this beautiful, distant man
holding me close yet never close enough.
his hands warm but never knowing  
where i truly hurt. i want to peel back my skin,  
show him where the bones are brittle
press his hand to the bruises that linger
to reveal the hurt without flinching.

but he is quiet- my silent healer  
and i am tired of whispering, “see me!”
into shadows, he will never chase.  
so i lie still, half-known and half-hoping.
a broken thing too weary to break again
wondering if love is just the art of pretending -
we are whole.

A lingering glance.
I look away.
A subtle flirt.
I don’t notice.

Blatant ignorance.
But not blissful.
Months pass.
They tell me.
I understand.

A lingering glance.
I still look away.
A subtle flirt.
I blush a bit.

New knowledge.
I didn’t see it.
It eats at me.
Guilt for not knowing.
Never questioning.

A lingering glance.
My eyes hold.
A subtle flirt.
A blushing smile.

I think I understand.
They connected with me.
I think I understand.
Why they see me like this.
Why I see them the same.

A lingering glance.
I make a funny face.
A subtle flirt.
I finally flirt back.

Beginning are opportunities
For failure.
And flight.
Endings are opportunities
For darkness.
And light.
But you are an opportunity
To set my
heart alight