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rare-and-rad Sep 2014
life didn't have to end up in such a place
I'm stuck, no escape, it's to much, it's making me go apes
all I see here is nothing but shame, regrets, and sadness upon everyone's face.....

grew up into what the world views as a **** up, someone who never made it, someone that just wouldn't come to a stop
it slowly developed as a 10 year old who began smoking ****
18 now, **** became his need

I'm happy as can, theres no-one around tell what I can't do, I don't have to come to a stop
next thing you know theres knock on the door
oh ****, it's a cop

promised the cop I'd throw away anything that has to due with drugs
but the cop was way to smart for that, so he stayed and made sure I did what said
instead all I did was hide all of it under my bed

a month later the same cop returned, I tried running but I'm only 103 pounds and haven't seen sunlight for more than then a day
he caught me in the quickness, I pleaded and pleaded that he let me go
"I'm only doing this for your own good, don't you remember me, I'm your only brother, please stop trying to runaway"

didn't recognize him at first until I looked him straight in his eyes
I began to tear up but I didn't want to cry
the pain was getting held back, next thing you now I black out
he thought I was going die

he rushed me to the hospital and everything made sense
that's where I truly opened up my eyes
he wasn't a cop and this wasn't me
I was just in the land of the killer demon bees

that place was where I felt like I was in charge and had nothing but power
now I'm sitting in a place I call home
thinking hour after hour
rare-and-rad Sep 2014
Dear ****,

       ******* and your devilish traps
thanks for making my good days go to crap
thanks for separating me from my mother,
for making me look like a **** up to my brother
thanks for the addiction I have to face
you really did take me to another place
thanks for making me into the person I am
at least you never made me slam
thanks for making me stay up for a week or two
you showed me that I got nothing to lose
thanks for putting shadows in front of my eyes
but if it wasn’t for that I wouldn’t have realized my lies
I now put a gat in the side of my lap
cause I can’t even sleep or even take a nap
I’m always moving around , where ever it is you take me
bringing me to my dealers house making me beg on my knees
even if it’s just leftover’s, crumpled up in aluminum foil
Now I pick my arms because I think it begins to boil
I’m known as the black sheep in my family
you made my life a ****** up tragedy
The scars you caused aren’t only visible but mental
Thank god I stopped before I melted my dentals
There’s still a voice in my head telling me not to leave you
but I want to start my actual life, I want to be someone new
I thank you for the **** caused, for the mistakes you made me do
But I’m leaving you now, one last thing, *******.
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
Im Sitting Here
Thinking about life.
As The Homies Are Taking Turns
Passing, Shot Gun
Sniffing, Racking, hot railing
Twisting
The Pookie Pipe 666
The Devils Clear ****
There Getting lost in that ****
Addicts since they were all youngin
Kicking it with 19, 25 30 40 year olds
Im Looking, Then Im looking down.
see the pipe passed on to me
Where ibegan to think and
Look Down On my
Life.
Reality hits me.
Im following the same line, chasing the same thang
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
iWant To Be Set Free.
Away And Cured From This Addictive Disease.
iWant To Be Happy, iWant To Actually Smile
iWant To Be Able To Feel
iWanna Laugh And Enjoy Life
iDont Like Being Addicted
iDont Like Using And Tweaking No More
iWant To Quit
Sober Up Entirely
From My Health And Mind
iWant The Angel Back On My Shoulders.
iWanna Do Good
iWanna Succeed And Become Somebody
This Drug Always Seems To Get The Best Of Me
To Fall Easily
God Give Me Strength And Strong Wings
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
Yes
Never Had iThought
Id Actually Be Or Fall inlove.
A Mutual Desire
Something iFeel And People
Dont Call Me insane
Cause iTs A Human Being
Not A Chemical
Substance.
iRealistically Feel, How iKnow
iTs Real.
He's Better Than Drugs
A Fullfilling
Natural Stimulant dose
My Happiness my
everything, 1st love of my life
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
iMMa Love You
Till The Day They Make Me Leave You.
They Don't Know Your My Soul & i
Need You.
I Know iTs Wrong, But iT Feels So Right.
2012 iD Always Repeat "imma Smoke This **** Till iM Dead" Was So Out Of, Smoked Out Telling My Parents iLove Crystal More Than Then.
Anshul Sep 2014
bring back breaking bad
i miss you walt and jesse
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
iJust Want To Escape From Reality once again.
Heartfull of Pain, Pipe Full of Magic
Im Having So Many
Racing Thoughts, wild emotions zoning i feel like
Im losing it Again, iwant Outs at this moment i want to
Scream "**** THIS" And Run Away again.  Icant cope
With this, its too much iwant to feel numb and forget.
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
" Yeah, Mother mary iTs That
Devil ****.
Low Base Drowned Out
Super High Treble
****.
All iNeed iS Drugs, Aint
iT Funny
That iT Keeps Me Outta Trouble
***** 1Hit? double Lit "
Devil
Evil
Vaccine
IV
Lived
PEARL SMOKE Sep 2014
iM Scared To Fall Back
Into My Old habit
Im worried
I Don't Know if il be able to get off
Crystal ****
Temptation is quick to blind me
Im weak minded when
It comes to this
What are the chances to get
Into the habit again...
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