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Zane Smith Jul 2022
with keeping myself together.
i'm trying to work on all the pieces.
i have nothing left.
i have the smallest will to live, even though
i know there is so much to do and see,
people to meet and places to go.
i just don't want to keep feeling how i feel.
i wish i was excited to wake up every morning.
like how i used to be when things felt good.
like when a new day felt like a new start.
not now
all it feel like is endless days.
the weeks repeat themselves.
the thoughts and feelings crawl back,
and i crumble at their touch.
i feel so dead
but so alive because i have so much going on.
i feel dead because i keep telling myself,
i will get through this exhausting time.
we're all struggling. i know.
but *******
it really hurts all the time
just to be
here.
11/1/2020 10:05PM
ryn Jun 2022
.
          These thoughts
are a haphazard
                 tessellation
of moments,
         sounds
           and scents -

  caught in a
      persistent loop…

         Such it is,
   that they herald
       no known beginning,
and yield
     no foreseeable end.


.
Dave Robertson Oct 2021
This is where the wet will be
when my wellies come out of hibernation
(though, technically, it’s aestivation,
every day’s a school day)

when someday soon, this loop,
this recuperative walk
will weigh heavy on my feet
with the mud of thought
and of the mud of actual mud

til then I’ll wend, mostly light footed
with the rattle of mowers
and threat-cackle of magpies
to score me
and though not Oscar worthy
the kite-screech soundtrack serves
Maloi Oct 2021
Stuck on a
Moment that
I want to repeat in a
Loop and don't like to
Escape ever.
it hits different when you smile
Valya Oct 2021
Tears stream down my eyes
As I realize that yet again
I am back to square one
Will I ever be able to get out of this loop
Or is this the life that I will be
Forced to live
The changes in emotion hit me so hard each time and it's slowly killing me...
Somewhere in time!
Come back to me.
My love
Two minds one single thought
Two hearts one single beat
Thats is still us dear
I love thee rdd-Jpc
"I still exist" twin flame yee
did write entailing all this.

As the world bends it loops.
I find thine sylhuette dancing
hobbering around me.
Looping me back to life
Yee never left me beloveth pc
Thanks for waking me up
For watching over me rdd

"Each night before I go to sleep, not knowing if I shall wake up ever again,
but with your name in my lips I see the sunshine
again and again.!" PC-Rk.

I love thee so much
I think of thine courage
love brain heart, grace,
It all defines me within

In thine arms forever
I remain to part never
My Angel guardián
yee have saved me sweet P.
Yee bit the apple yee love me

This love I have shared
With human predators, wolves, boys beggards
enemies poets and kings.

But allmy travels spin me back into thy loving kindness and wise patient love's serenity.
whence happily ever after

I, i, still exist.
~~~~~~
https://youtu.be/QPROkOaqE_4

based on my life's true events
Somewhere in time.
selina Jul 2021
i've been running from the truth
running up an empty staircase
yet somehow i keep spiraling down

i've been searching for love
for a droplet of whatever is left
a symbol of hope to answer my prayers

if i reach the top of these stairs
having finally escaped truth's poena
will you be there waiting for me?

or will it be deja vu, another infinite loop
of my heart drowning in deep waters
as you stand there, watching with a smile

my heart hesitates but my steps are steady
i run from no truth, i already know the truth
things are meant to fall apart

and every time, it is the same
and every time, i am always powerless
just a mere bystander to my own downfall
the only experience i have with infinite loops are from ap comp sci a LOL java was a nightmare
Hopeless Outlet Apr 2021
I refuse to succumb
to your
poison
This is my
will
you come back
here
to me
and never go away
Rollercoaster Feb 2021
I find the charging sky lights to be
disorienting and pure.
Black and white at same time.

It’s a rainbow in the clouds after the rain
and succeeding the dark clouds which make me sane.

I am aware that rain will come again,
yet I don’t know when I will be rain-bound.
Each turn is a change in the circle of pain.

When the lightning strikes,
we look at the bright, white flash of light.
White pierces through the dark,
and confounds us and leaves us looking at the stars.

We wait for it to strike,
only for it to come at the most unexpected of times.
We must not be confused, or surprised.

We should rejoice when things go awry.
For it will too pass, and change will evade.
The earned hope will remain.

For chaos and the unexpected are change,
and change is the inevitable truth which cannot be tamed.
We’re celebrating the chaos and celebrating change.
We’re celebrating the inevitable when we dance in the rain.
Everything is in a circle, it a cycle of interconnectedness or several cycles of interconnectedness which are themselves connected to each other. It is the same storyline, a basic plot line that follows a similar story from the past and everything repeats itself. So, it does not matter what the end goal might be, it is about the experience and the change that will give us a greater understanding. Living though the motions, looking at the circle go, and know a greater story exists and you just have to fill in the blanks to make it your own - to make your cycle of birth and death meaningful and like a ring with a lot of engravings on them and then hanging that ring in an a larger ring that involves the entire existence. Not just your existence, but everything that exists which is also going through the motions and is following the circle and engraving its own little and large details on the Ring of existence.
And at every turn point of the ring, which is almost at every point, there is change and there is chaos.
We think of rain to be release- from winter cold or summer heat. Release from the uniformity of suffering. Yet, rain comes in as chaos. We do not know when it will come and how the raindrops will fall. They will fall as they want to - in utter chaos. After uniformity, comes change. Change comes in form of chaos. And navigating in that chaos i.e. dancing in the rain is thriving and celebrating each little raindrop as it is. We’re celebrating the chaos and celebrating change. We’re celebrating the inevitable when we dance in the rain.
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