I didn't think you'd come back
I thought I scared you off
I thought you'd found someone else
Found a happier life
But here we are
In your little futon bed
Trying to stifle these
"I miss you" tears
Tears I never thought I'd see
Because you have a stupid stoic heart
And you don't let anyone see you cry
I didn't think your heart would let you say those words
I didn't think your heart would let you feel at all
But seeing you cry
Just made me cry
And seeing me cry
Just made you cry

The whole conversation was ******
By tears I thought I'd never ever see
And emotions I thought you'd never feel
But someone broke the glass
And sand started to pour out
As we wrapped into each other
And became a beach
With waves of tears splashing over each other's bodies
Our emotional sand mixing together
Just a shore of
I love you's
I missed you's
Why did you leave?
You hurt me
I never meant to
Go **** yourself
I never stopped loving you

I never stopped loving you
As I walked up and down the shore
Waiting for you to ******* come back
Waiting for you to give me some answers
As to why you left in the first place
Waiting for you to stop loving me
So I could move on
But instead I kept walking up and down the beach
Looking at our collection of shells
Waiting for you to ******* come back

I was always cautious about using the L word
The word used after like
The big L
Because you can't take that **** back
Once you say it,
You can't unsay it
You can't unhear it

Then I found the L word
I found him
A milk chocolate man with yummy espresso eyes
A goofy, crooked smile that never quits
Tight, soft curls pushed back in a black mane
And a voice that floats on feathers

I found the L word
In between my fingers where he holds my hand
On the nape of my neck where he kisses me at night
Across my cheeks where he brushes his hand
In my mouth where he feeds me the food he's prepared

I found the L word while I was folding my laundry
While I was making us coffee
While we were talking about everything
While we were doing a puzzle and getting nowhere
While I was scrubbing his back in the shower
While we fell asleep in the summer heat under the heavy blankets

I found the L word at a time when I didn't think I would
In a person who wasn't supposed to love me
But did anyway
Despite it all

Whenever you say
Goodbye, I tear up and wait
For your next reply.

My steps have gotten lighter
unaccustomed to hardwood floors
It's not that I'm afraid,
don't want to make a noise
Rather, my heels can't seem to settle
and I always feel like dancing
now that I'm finally
always
just a few steps and through a door
from kissing you

Are you staying,
Or are you going?
And if you’re going,
How do I make you stay?
Would it make a difference if
I told you how I felt about you,
Told you that I’ve loved you
From the moment I met you?
If I told you how much
I miss you when you’re gone,
How you’re the last thing
On my mind at night,
And the first thing I think of when I wake?
If I told you how when I see you in a dream,
And begin to tell you how much
I care about you, the dream fades,
And I’m left with tear stains on my pillow?
Because if you stay,
I will love you with everything I have,
If you stay,
I will always be there for you,
If you stay,
I will have everything my heart has ever wanted,
But all of this will only happen,
If you stay.

Your car turns the corner and flees my gaze
As I wipe the streams of agony from my face
Dreading the miles that disconnect our bodies
And leave our hearts to face the withdrawal
The waves of pain that split cracks through my soul
The pain of waking up to an empty bed
The pain of reaching for a hand that’s no longer there
Of clinging to my phone to await the ping of your next sonnet and the ring that calls me to your voice
Of longing that has surrounded my heart with iron bars of loneliness
Of the circumstantial separation that bursts my mind into roaring flames
But I still await the next time you pull into my driveway
I still smile as I count the days until I run into your arms once again
I acknowledge that this tormenting cycle will someday end
And we’ll no longer have to endure another painfully long goodbye.

six foot five
with an award winning smile.
a voice that could melt hearts,
that surely melts mine.

and here i am,
almost three in the morning.
and i know he came around
for some reason.

a good reason.

my life had fallen dark
after losing my last love.
but i guess my new man,
he's a gift from above.

he's changing my life,
and yes, for the better.
being with him will be
the end of my inner strife.

while he does live far,
my life will be going through changes.
over nine hundred miles away,
at, least that's by car.

but listen here my love,
my heart is wherever you are.