America
"the land of the free and the home of the brave"
Right?
No.
America is not/nor has it ever been free
See,
America has fallen,
it has crashed,
and it is burning.
America was meant to be paradise.
But the people are hurting,
and last I checked,
there is no pain in paradise.
There is injustice.
The rich stare at a boat full of money,
while the poor stare at an empty fridge,
begging for help.
America is the place where you are killed for your race,
and slandered for your ***.
America is the place where public schools forget who you are,
and college costs a life's worth of savings.
America is not what the founding fathers wanted.
The only thing that matters is the Benjamins.
No one gives a **** about justice,
and everyone only works to get drunk.
America owns crime,
and brings lies to the table.
America has lost its morals.
What happened?
war?
power
money
ALL OF THE ABOVE.
America has failed.
But here we are,
in a country that has stopped giving a ****.
So here's my question
*what's next?

lord help me!
no answer.
Lord, he hurts me!
Silence.
Lord, take my soul!
Silence.
Lord, I want to **** myself!
no answer.
First, the bible went.
Then the cross necklace.
Everything had to go.
I needed help.
Need help,
but where are you?
God, the savior of all,
the hero.
Where are you?
Because I've looked long and hard,
hoping to finally see my salvation.
But,
no.
No one came as I was choked.
You didn't come when I was being tortured.
You stayed in heaven,
while I was living my own hell.
I did everything you wanted me to do.
I stayed faithful,
giving my testimony,
following your word.
But you let me down.
You always have.
"god loves his children"
No.
I thought I was a child of god.
Apparently not.
Because I am still here.
Inside the house of harm.
Inside the house of sin.
Evil lives here.
Before you tell me,
"don't give up,
I will come through,
it is just a trial"
answer me this,
where were you then,
and where are you
NOW?

a buzz
the only sound in the dark
ah !
disappointment disappointed !
never butterfly
flew higher

When you wish for more
More than you're given
More than you'll ever get...

When you dare to contemplate a life with more
You're definitely sure
To drown.

The whirr of the rush hour in the morning
and the lack of human sounds outside my door
reinforces that I'm alone.

It was a noise similar to my usual routine,
of quelling needy pangs of connection,
with what is always plugged in.

You had slept with me on this bed twice before
and you were unaware that on it,
I numbed myself quite frequently.

I reprimand myself to let go of expectations,
they have long become pipe dreams and idealism,
and would be foolish to follow still.

sadness
is my life
every morning I open my eyes
and I know
sadness
is my reality
everything is grey
no colors
no music
no words
sadness
is my life

Use to despise birthdays *** all it brought was disappointment
I would get irritated from lack of attention and my bed was my only Ointment
One day out of the year
and did u use the opportunity?
no u miss ur appointment
And you do so continually  
Never had a party to myself
Because my parents didn't care enough
Had to share birthdays with Em and the child was ungrateful she always received stuff
And when they sang happy birthday they sang her name so yes it was tough
I only have 5 birthday cards to my name
And Out of the 5
only 1 person played their part
only one person gave me something from the heart
Used to think its a shame
I never got anything because They said my brown skin tone was lame
My ignorant outside family wouldn't give me their claim
Tried To stop the waterworks but a  dam can only last for so long
Had to finally realize I was looking at it all wrong
Used to think that because no one told me happy birthday
and no one gave me gifts to my dismay
That I wasn't ****
but now I see it
Finally realize it
They did give me something
At the time it seemed like nothin
But They gave me the clay That molded me into the person I am today
Would I go back and change it?
No I'm okay

Dissapointment
Comes and goes
Condiment
Just flows
No one cares
They just walk away
It just like rotten pairs
Distastful
Scream for help
Nobody turns
Then a dog yelp
Then they turn
When i talk
Nobody listen
Im just a wall
A petition
Everything an obstical
Absruction, impediment, hindrace
A barrier
A trouble
It's distress
It's frustation
Sometimes iys anxity
Sometimes its shy but insucure
No diligence
No perseruance
No industry
No vigor
No carefulness
No intensity
No attention
No care
Not evedigent or painstacking
It's all
Its dissappointment