i'm floating in surrealism,
satisfaction engulfing my bay of love.
my limbs are listening to me quietly,
contently,
liberated.
i speak my affection for you through delicious movement.
i simply flow like water,
you simply shine like the sun.

14:00

i'm sat in the café drinking coffee,
you're outside screaming in the rain.
what a sweet display of annoying dissonance.

The cold metal delves deep in me.
The red on my skin is all I see.
Red fades to black, sudden collapse..
Blinded by white, all due to relapse.
Light as a feather my last breath flows.
-
Surrounded by white a black rose rose.
Tiny as it seems, I verge upon.
As I aproach the rose grows on.
Thorny roots cover beneath me.
Seizing my ankles, forming a black sea.
Pulling me down into the darkness
Far below the white and harmless.
Ringed by black with constant pain.
A heartless soul held by chain.

You're hearing, but that does not mean you are listening.
You're seeing, but that does not mean you are watching.
You're smiling, but that does not mean you are happy.
You're nodding, but that does not mean you are agreeing.
I hang on every word as it drips from the upturned corners of your dark pink lips. I drink them in as if they were a necessity to my existence. My eyes follow your every move in front of me, from the porcupine spikes on your freshly cut hair to the dress shoes you don't like to wear. I know the placement of every freckle on your arms because I've counted the abundance of constellations on your skin a thousand times with my boring brown eyes. The biggest grin comes across my face when I even think of you and the purest form of happiness shines off of my almost white teeth. Every corner, every crevice of my smile bubbles over with gratitude for somehow ending up living in the same world as you, getting to see you every day in my passions and in my mind, having the privilege to know you. I have held my own thoughts but changed their appearance in every way to get an ounce of approval, the slightest hint at a possibility that I might be doing something right while I stand in the chaotic storm that your life is sometimes. And you taught me about perspectives, we've spent weeks on the lesson, yet you still can't see that my everything reflects what's best for you. You still don't understand that I love you.
You're flirting, but that does not mean you love me, too.

Chaos humdrum of roaring engines.
The lost siren between concrete slabs
Ricocheting its scream throughout
the hallway streets,
already echoing with horns and yells.

Sleepless and ever burning,
the city lurches on
in agonizing sounds
muffled between high rise pristine glass
and shanty shacks painted with dust.

The frantic commotion of agonized madness,
In zigzag traffic and potholed roads.
The stop and start of hustle and frustration
Rises and falls like a dancing dust storm.

Everything present in a quieter world
is lost in the struggle of city life.
There's no peace or silence here.
Just constant exhaustion in the luminescent roar of human chaos.

26 Dec. 2015

What is better than a perfect success story?
Simple
A story where the hero is knocked down over and over only to find the strength to get up again and keep pushing forward
A life with only peaks and no valleys is like a story with no tragedy
Like a movie with no suspense
Where is the novelty in a predictable flow of butterflies and rainbows?
The risk of loss and the conquering of darkness is just as beautiful as the most wonderful pleasures that this world has to offer

Life -->Death

"Why do
People see your
Behaviour uncouth?"

Death-->Life

"It is simple
You are
A savoury falsehood,
While I am
A bitter truth!"

When I think of our love, I feel the warmth of the sun on my skin. I feel the rush of the tide coming in. I feel overwhelmed, but I'm excited to feel so alive and elated. This feeling grows in my chest, like my entire soul has a burning desire to know more about you. I want to see your eyes open in the morning. I wanted to feel your bodies warmth next to me in the middle of autumn. You had me at your finger tips, always begging to know more about what you were about, I yearned for somebody to care. As we spent more time together, our bond blossomed like the most delicate and rare flower. We had the most vibrant complementing colors, our differing shades blending together into one unique hue of serenity. You gave me hope that my future might be something worth fighting for, you gave me something to work for. You promised me a future I thought that I would never have. Somewhere in the mix of me losing myself in you, I grew blind to the shift in our relationship. The colors of our love had changed from vibrant shades of fire, to the dark, menacing shades of hell. It's easy to confuse the two when they feel and look the same. It isn't until you are completely engulfed into the wrong one that you can see the difference. You grew so dark, taking all of the life I thought you were giving to me. I didn't realize how I had become so small, always standing in your shadow. I lost who I was completely. This love felt like a dream, and some dreams become a dark reality.

ONE shadow ruefully told the other ,
it has fallen in love with,
defying the logic the shadows
are supposed to follow,
not to be deceived by darkness
or light,that creates what one perceives.

"How long we've been marking time
trying in vein,to break loose from the
patronizing glare of lights, that kept
us slaves of it's love.Good riddance!"

Two bright bulbs, utterly tired, of burning
so long,which made it possible for the shadows
day dream,slowly shut their eyes in weariness,
oblivious of the wild talk of the shadows
that reflected a perfect vision of fallacy,

No one any more would see, even a penumbra
of either of the shadows,in that darkened heaven.

Tell me something I don't know
Is this life a TV show
When I want fast it all goes slow
When time I grasp for it quickly flows
Far from my hands and out of sight
I wish we all could just take flight
With minds so powerful and bright
From hearts of gold we spread delight
We change the world and strive for right
But every day will turn to night