he thought he
could declare himself
depressed and gain a sense
of closure

but labels only reach so far
and feelings so much farther

is it
just me
or has the air been getting thinner
recently

Or maybe the current can take me away.
For upon this stiff plane,
I don’t know where I’ll stay.
The path is familiar,
Yet still it is long.
A recluse come true.
A lonely man’s song.
The trees aren’t foreboding,
They welcome me home.
This is the real peace that I’ve longed to know.

As I sit, slouched over,
Lady in the black dress tells me,
Sit up
Breathe in slow, now
Into the cup full of water,
The fog in plastic
Like the fog in my head,
Remember what they keep saying,
Someone thinks they're hated
And you don't have the words to correct them
So let that poor boy
Walk away, rejection
Like poison in his heart
Remember my nickname was "poison"
Left arm is limp and dead,
It hurts to pick up anything
Rise and lean on the table,
No,
Don't touch anything
Leeches on your chest,
And everyone keeps noticing,
"My girl"
And the words echo in
A hollow plastic mind
Filled with fog as the water is drained
Hair pulled back or hanging over the eyes
Well either way will stop your breathing
People keep asking, "are you okay"
And lies are just so easy,
Too easy,
Mumble in as many words,
Fine, it's fine,
Pray to hell they don't tell her
She can't know, can't know
Brings you to tears just
Thinking about forcing as many lies again
I'll look in the mirror but won't say,
I don't say "smudged drawing" or "failed graphics",
I see dead weight,
I beg them,
Don't make me take this off,
Don't force me to look at all,
Please

Joy—
Drops
Pure and light
Like a bubble, a moment
Of humanity encapsulated
here.

Slips
through drowning lips.