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this space we occupy
for an instantiation, once,
core sapience we form used
when we speak of national agency,
emerging weform deep voicem'

hohoho

as if it were our weform making money
work
for its corporate entity rights,
to consist
of rule bound social orders, see sovreign
authority, as it is written, thus it must be

imagined done… ignor the Jubillee, empower
compound interest do the math, use the app

how fast can money grow,
whoa, tens of billions to trillions,
in a mere forty year trek
in the wilds.
in money worshipping
weapon extending rhino horn
carnal triune mind body boundaries,
some intelligence communities, are guts,
we get gut level info,
and guts stink,
on the inside, where we decide
courage is core collection carry ons,
as gaseous we decide
to suggest chewing charcoal
and swallowing
some pride
gulp
that's all heart and vagus nerve loop deciding
given just cause
to realize Agent Orange was
a biological weapon, speed we used
for plants, made'm live so fast you die
for gobbling nitrogen,
to expend
in devine expansion
organical compounding confounding mindphuc
burps. RGBs, rot gut burpies…fugeefoodgas
does the confusion continue,
or do we choose
to try the spirits, all rise

find the lying ones lying
about "Why Vietnam"
right - same lie, same judge,
in Lyndon's Daisy Ad face, we who remain,
dune did dune done read and watched
a we, we can imagine
call out the thumpers,
bring our silica eating Wourms writhing
forms of information relativity cross wiring wills

to power all but me, he whose fingers touch
letters, each a mental key
to a word
in a common tongue, key
we formed cognations, ready
reader
language,
a language first peaceable,
not bossy,
gentle, easy
to use to tell stories
to illustrate
peace as a practice,
imagine images, on the screen,
so realizable the mystery resolute,
- in this context truth is freeing
all men's equality, is that conceivable, ra'
tough to say, you know, it ain't so, true,
we all can add to the whole moment's peace
towb  uses fructify
duty to be
to think it so, that's good duty, do do

duties such as thinking it not so, if it stinks,
don't let those clog the exits,
inside the gut mind scheduling core reminders,

cancers, come and go, we keep breathe-ing
easy, given an instance,

took a mile. A gas, it's been a gas.

A form of mind, and a frame of mind,
often can contain changing minds
and, trust me, dying, is changing,

if anybody remembers, once
seeming self aware… inside out.
Indeed, I do appreciate the ready eyes that read between times retold lies about who decides peace or war.
Ksenija Ostojić Dec 2024
Staring down at the rope,
Rethinking every life choice.
Wishing to be dead,
Messages are already sent.
There is no going back.
I get the rope tie it around my neck,
I can't hang it anywhere.
I tighten the rope,
Vision went blurry.
I can't hear anything,
Ringing in my ears is too loud.
Its been 10 minutes,
I didn't go unconscious.
I just gave up.
Woke up with my face blue.
Its kinda bad
Jeremy Betts Dec 2024
I close my eyes
A feeble attempt to get back to a dream
I realize
It's ridiculous to chase one particular theme
Too many tries
With no mind paid to what it could mean
I fantasize
But fantasies have a misleading gleam
The crystal ball lies
It's all a regurgitated, outdated scheme
My reality cries
But it's better than when it use to scream

©2024
Jeremy Betts May 2024
...I hear ya, I do
I just don't find what's been said to be true
But if I take a look through your view
And in lue of the downward spiral conducted by the waves of blue that I've now seen you go through
I want to go ahead and attempt something new
What do you say we put aside debate and simply conversate for a few
A little bit of back and forth like birds of a feather seem to do
Why don't you choose a neutral venue
And I'll collect the short guest list of me, myself and I plus you

©2024
Hollis Aug 2022
TW : eating disorder, suicide attempt, abuse

In my phone
There’s a contact name that’s just swear words
The occasional bad bad word that I can say in therapy but don’t in public
And it’s my mom’s contact name
I changed it after our 1millionth fight
Right before I left for uni
Because she called me fat
And at the time I was five months sober of my eating disorder
Maybe sober isn’t the right word but whatever
And my brain snaps
I scream and cry
She screams back at me
I call her “fat” back because I’m mad
And I spend the night sobbing
I even call my abusive dad who chose to leave therapy because he thinks he’s getting better
He hasn’t left his girlfriend who restricted food from me yet so, are you sure Dad?
And he tries the whole facetime while I audibly cry to not sound mean about her
And I thank him for trying in my head
Because my mom only refers to him as slurs or Satan
I eat the entire cake she got me in the fridge the next day
Before even noon
I feel bad immediately after but at least she can’t have any
And then I’m suddenly jealous that she didn’t have any
So no weight gain
I drink two cups of iced coffee with that extra calorie Starbucks syrup
And then my sister gets me Popeyes
She gets me this after yelling at our mother
Because we don’t really talk that much openly
But we both have our own scars from her words
Mine developed into eating disorders, cuts on my legs, and just general mental illness
Hers just developed into being a rock solid wall
When my mom comes home and sees me eating
She takes a bite
George Krokos Jan 2022
At times one has to go sideways before they can go forward
when attempting to reach that place they’re heading toward.
________
From 'Simple Observations' ongoing writings since the early '90's.
CIN Jan 2022
I tried to **** myself last week
But all did was throw up
And give you another medical bill
I made the school work pile up
and my friends mildly worried
gave myself a big bruise
And nearly cried from the emails
Explaining that i couldn't do the math quiz on Friday the 15th
Because i tried to **** myself last week
Did you have any suicidal thoughts this week? ah, maybe one or two, nothing serious.
CIN Jan 2022
I was outside in the cold for hours that day
thinking about how to end things
i passed your body
On my way upstairs
Before spreading out my saved pills
And unlocking a knife
Crimson spread along my thigh
And my stomach became upset
My water is now empty
And all that's left on the counter is dust
A little bit of red stains the blade
And i pull up my pants nonchalantly
My first attempt was done in my bathroom after being on suicide watch for months. If i want something i will find a way, and you wont see it coming.
Valya Oct 2021
Will someone show me love once again?
Will anyone be so kind as to take
A broken soul and help them back up
Is that a tale that can still be told for me
Or will I be stuck with the
Stream of tears that row down my face each day
As my only companion
A painful reminder of my failed attempts
At a perfect love before
Can I have a time that is different
Can those next tears shimmer instead
And lead me to a happier future
One that teaches me what unconditional love is
I just wanna see what unconditional love is in a romantic way
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