they don't tell you that it hurts.
that your chest gets too tight and aches, and your lungs gasp and scream for air while your throat stings, and your eyes swell and burn from scalding tears that you can't stop no matter how much you want to.
they don't tell you that all your muscles scream the next day from tensing up.
they don't tell you that there's no way to stop them.
they don't tell you that they don't just affect your body.
they overtake your mind.
every illogical fear, every small worry, magnified until they've grown into a monolith of overwhelming panic crushing you under its weight.
no. they dont tell you any of that at all.
why don't they tell you any of that at all?
it weighs so heavily on you all day.
there's pain in your heart as soon as you awake from fitful and restless sleep.
you know it's coming most of the time.
you can feel it in the uneasy heartbeats just a little too fast, the little stressors seeming bigger than they should.
it does so much damage; big, heavy panic.
destroys you while it's there, and most of the time after it goes away, too.
i've been dealing with panic attacks, so here's a little glimpse. thank you to any readers **