This is an apology.
No, not a notes app apology.
You deserve more. This apology
is a thank you.
So thank you.
For being the people I needed, right before
I needed you. Thank you, for showing me
to the stars. Thank you, for teaching me
how to feel.
You arrived as a black wave, a dark abyss
coating the horrors yet unknown to me.
You held me near, a guidebook of pages.
I focused on you, blind to the evils surrounding me.
I loved you. I love you. I thank you.
The horrors haven’t left me.
I don’t think they ever will.
A mask will always hide my face,
I will always come running back to you,
I will always think of you when I’m alone.
But these days are brighter than when we met.
These days I look towards
the blue sky, not a dark wave.
These days I focus on joy.
These days, I let my love for you,
be a background, not my home.
So, to you,
I apologize, and I thank you.
For everything.
