She lost every reason she had to smile
Shoes worn out from walking the same sad sidewalks
That careless city holds eternally gray horizons
She dreams of a day the clouds will float away
She dreams of a day when she can feel... anything

Pain and suffering abound in a world filled with strife. Children go hungry and disease ravages whole countries. All seems hopeless and lost, and yet we are told that we should,praise God? Why should we praise him and who is this God that will let people suffer so? Perhaps it is because we have tried everything but calling on him, that when all else has failed us that now more than ever we need to give our praises to God.

I wanted
someone
that wouldn't
be afraid

of me.

I spent
twenty-one
years
doubting
that person
could ever
exist.

For humans
are far too shallow
and our
complications
are

way too deep

but I honestly believe
we should not have to
be alone.

I believe in independence.
I believe in self-reliance
and I believe in self-respect.

But I also believe that
humans can connect
on a far deeper level
than just what we see.

I believe there is a time
and place
for everything
and that includes
the moments

we fall in love.

You see,
there will be days
that you fill
empty
and lonely
but you have
to be there for yourself.

No one is going to give you
a handout
unless you show them
you are going to
make it count.

No one is going to
rely on someone
that cannot
rely on them self.

Co dependence can be
beautiful
but nevertheless-
it is filled with
even more grief.

You cannot fix somebody else
when you are still
practicing
the craft
of self-love.

Allow your lows
to be reminders
that you
can lose
and smile
knowing
that you can
bounce back,
too.

There is nothing
graceful
in struggling
but there is
something
glorious
in the

overcoming

and believe me-
you will find a way
to live through it all.

And then
some day
somebody,
somewhere
is going to
admire
the way
you refuse
to fall.

And you will wonder
how you ever
let the world
make you feel

so small.

-Andrew Durst.

Dear whomever may come across this,

It is a cold November night,
I have no idea what tomorrow holds, and honestly I do not want to anymore.
There is nothing that can slow my mind,
Not even the coldest of winds next to a burning fire.

I wish I could tell you that your ship won’t be destroyed,
I am afraid I would be lying if I said it won’t be ruined at times.
There will be nights of torrential waves and lightning that seem like they will never end,
The water will rush over your head and make you drown in your own pain.

You will see all the thoughts and memories that haunt you for the rest of your life,
And you will see the moments and times that you cherish.
You will regret taking them for granted and wish you evaporate into the night sky,
But please my beloved, do not give your life away and wish to die.

This may be a dark open letter, but I hope that this makes you feel a little better,
Because I know how dark this time is, I know the shadows all too well.
There will never be anything that could be worse than this it seems,
But believe me, there’s an even darker place below these tides.

I know the shadows speak to you as if they have control over you,
And maybe they do.
I don’t know why the darkness over,
If only I knew, then maybe I would help you understand.

But I want you to know that even though all may seem gone,
It truly is not.
The world may seem like a maze full of dead ends and torturous nights,
But eventually they will subside and you will know why.

For now, know that the waves will take a while to go back to their normal tide,
And that one day you will open your eyes and see the most beautiful of sights.
I can’t tell you when that will be, and I wish I could.
But for now, I have one thing to say.

Don’t sink.
Endure the weight of the waves and the sand.
Let them make you someone different, but not take away all of you.
Do not sink.

Stay*,
I whispered,
As the door shut behind me.