Despite the evilness inside
Here I am looking from afar
Watching as you go down the stairs
In a very long white gown
I saw water
Flowing down your cheeks
I bet it’s warm
Because it’s pure
That I want to touch it myself
Seeing you travel that path
I thought its fine
You are in my domain after all
The field that everyone is afraid to walk into
I am a no ordinary creature
I am in a myth
I was also in a superstitious belief
Every mankind knows me
Good and evil
They were all afraid of me
I am a king
A soul hunter
And because I am here gazing as you walk
I think you’re evil too...
If not,
How can you mesmerized a devil like me?

Day by day I wish
Each day I want my life to end
And every time it doesn't work
Time by time my life  losses its meaning
What is my purpose?
What am I to the world?
Who am I to begin with?

With the dagger pointed on his chest
A threat of danger advances to his front
By the stranger he thought needs a helping hand
All the possibilities he thought at the moment
Only a question came up
Will this be my end?
For my freedom to be taken away by someone I not know
Have they thought life was that low?
That by just a single blow
I might flow
And die in a moment for them just a show?
Have I done something that I will be forsaken?
For all I knew I have lived my life with joy
Although with regret I didn’t enjoy
The trouble im in now, am I just a toy?
For these two strangers of convict,
Willing to take my life away?
For a penny they thought I can give away
When In fact it’s a project I can’t give up halfway

Because I don’t deserve any
I learned to lie
Am evil know I should die
Forgive me my God for all my life I lied
All I could ever think of now is a blade or a knife
To end this lonely night
I am mad and fright
I just want to rest for life
This should settle everything
For I am just a thing
A Doll for all of things

In this relationship
Are we getting stronger
As we're getting closer?

Or we getting colder
As we're getting to know each other?

I knew from the start
That this day will come
There are changes along the way
And as day and time passes by
You made me feel needed no more
When frights became reality
My nightmares visits me even daylight
And when the sun comes down endless thoughts and restless nights occur
Love comes in a very unique and unexpected way
And when it leaves
It takes a way a part of us that can never be mended
Some part of it are the ability to feel and think simply
Like the simple questions with simple answers
But our heart can't seem to acknowledge
What to do?
How to move on?
Tell me what was it that I have to do
To rest my heart
To mend this broken heart?
I can never utter the word
"Goodbye"

How amazing it is that I had a brother
Although he’s always a bother
I wonder why I can’t love him just like any other
He’s cool and chubby
With his face sleeping like a baby
He smiles when he’s asleep
And got mad like a black sheep
I just can’t treat him like a ****
I love my brother and it hurts to see
How he act as though he cannot see
How precious his life can be
If only he will try not to turn his back and flee
I believe he will love everything as much as I do

I know love is harsh at times,
But it is the best thing in the world.

When we are hurt
Sweet words turn into knives
It cut deeply despite kindness within

Care turns into a killing intent
That we even selfishly hurt the person we love coz all we want is them to be ours alone

And love became nothing but words of emptiness that envelope our entirety.

When we are broken
We tend to say harsh words
And worst..
We may end up punching them on the face

But when you're hurt
And that pain is because of true love
A genuine heart that feels a deep pain

Shows a never ending...
A love that never cease to exist
The stare of kindness despite the pain keeping inside
Even if you hurt the one who loves you

He will look at you preciously
He will look at you with so much kindness
He will always accept
He is the one who has the heart of gold

He whom you hurt
Will take goodcare of you till last.
He whom you hurt will love you and accept the pain you gave
He whom you hurt will let go if you ask him to.

Though his truely badly deeply hurt!!!

Live your life to the fullest
Love to your hearts content
Never let sadness take over your happiness
Don let it bother you
After all life isn't long enough to experience half the world's greatness...

Among the door of chances
Never choose regret
Open your heart
Close your eyes
Kneel down and pray
For a better answer

One day I will be gone
Leaving only pains behind
Sufferings to heart
Tears to those I love
Scar to those who choose to put their hearts on me
My dear self
Cant we be gone silently?
Can we please fade away unnoticeably..

I often forget the meaning of importance
All I see are the efforts I do
And the gifts from a done favor
I laugh and get thrilled on the things that comes and happened
Only because I will benefit on it
I give and respect
Only because I expect goodness in return
In this world there is this one thought
Have I ever done something
That someone will ever take it
As important as friendship?

Share thy heart
And never keep it stashed
One smile is equivalent enough to lighten up one small soul..

there is this one thing that i want to say to you

the word that i was unable to say before we depart

MY MAN
i hate you from the bottom of my heart

the you who brought laughter to my childhood

and brought pain to my past

the you who destroyed my present
and killed my future

the you who will be happy seeing me leave

the you who promised me till death do us part..
yet end up breaking my heart..

the you who chose to live with another girl

the you who will surely regret for the rest of your life

for you who have chosen a girl whose hand is secretly tied to another man.

right now,
im sad and alone
im scared and hurt..
my dear prepare yourself
for i will bring back the old me
and i will let you suffer
and experience the feeling of being fooled and eventually be betrayed of by your own precious trust
i will be your old friend
your past
and your enemy.

when you were overwhelmed
and dont know what to do
if you need to runaway
but where to?
just tell me
and i will get lost with you

I'm scared because of you
Now that I'm falling
Are you going to leave me now?
Now that you know
Is it time to let go?
Though I'm in love
I don't want to expect anything in return
Because I'm scared
Its enough that you know
I don't want to hope anymore..

If ever we depart
Please smile for me
Even if im not here
As long as you think of me
I will surely Live On

Behind the blue sky
There are lights that never die

They never fade nor disappear
Instead they help me lessen my fear

Though they seem so far
I see those stars

Its not that bad
I can't get mad

They accompany me and never leave my side
Even day they never hide

Only that their presence is weak
Just like my own every  day and week

They lose their shine when there is light
And when dark they gain strength and shine bright

We are sometimes opposite nor the same
For we are like friends that never change

Though living in the opposite world
No one can separate us even a word

For the sky are made to look upon
And stars to cry and wish upon

When everything seems so wrong
They we're made to make us strong...

"I hate you but thank you for letting go!"
Everyone heard the words you said
They all believed, chattering and confused
But no one is better than him above
He knows everything
While you knows what it means
The person hearing it under numerous individuals standing in the crowd
Wishing he could dug a whole to hide
Hoping that he didn't did it on the first place and regret
Seeing you as beautifuly strong
Standing in the stage with chins up and resolute eyes
Lips curved into a mesmerizing arc

Cheer up.. Heart doesn't think
Don't be deceived by your feelings
Every step you'll make
Every decisions you'll made
You're heart will never think of the possible errors that you may encounter..
Never trust your mind for it only think not feel..
Sometimes don't think and don't follow your heart..
Just let the wind take you to where your soul truly belong..

With loud voice I see and heard
Moms cry and tears she shed
Tears of grief and sadness
That even I can’t fathom the loneliness
Of a wife losses her husband
With her shaking hands I found
A fragile old woman’s life
And the traits of goodness of her being his wife

They say am boyish
& am stylish as a guy
Does that mean am cool?
When I said I love you
& you know it’s true
Am I a bad friend?
When I listen to you
Every time you complain
Do you need someone else to hear your pain?
When I lean on you
& cried on your shoulder
Am I a bother?
Every time we discussed about us
Do you feel so disgust?
Even after the rain
& all we have is pain
Are we not deserving to gain?
If love can’t be found between the line
& we never cross the line
Friend can we start again from the starting line?

As long as you trust
As long as you care
As long as you hope
As long as you get hurt and worried
As long as you feel emotionally attached
You will always receive a Love
A Never Ending GIFT!

Its good to be a firefly
Even just for a day
Even though it will last only for a short moment
They Love
While risking their Life

More than she knows
More than he feels
More than they saw
More than everything that everyone found
My decisions and truth are no longer match and will never win over everyone's gossips and beliefs..
I will always be on the wrong side despite being true and correct.

I saw her sitting under the cherry blossom tree.
Shedding tears
Shouting as loud as she could
Doesn't paying mind if someone's seeing her
I doubt she would notice
I'm just right here
I'm never gone
And will never leave
I maybe dead
But not my soul who loves you still
Have faith
One day we'll meet once more
And we will never depart ever again

I accidentally fall from the rooftop
Even though I grip so hard I can’t stop
Falling hard from the third floor
Made me feel like am in a horror
I fell asleep for a year
It’s a coma that some people fear
It’s somewhat like a spear
That in instant will make you disappear

While my body lay on the bed I heard them cry
&they; talked to me, they did tried
As I heard them cried
How I wish I died

There is this someone’s voice
It made my heart rejoice
From then I made a choice
Just a bit more I will hear his voice

Every time he touched my hand
✓ the pulse monitor in his hand
I feel my heart skip a beat
I hope he didn’t heard my heart pump in my hand

Is this love?
I hope am not in love
If so, I might end up broken hearted
Because I don’t know until when I can be able to calm my heart

The next day I heard another voice and says
Come on! Breathe and stay!
It's hard to breathe and it's killing me
From then w/o knowing everything changed

Two more years have passed
The time clicked so fast
It's like a magic spell casts on me
Loud cheering voices awaken me

Even though I can now open my eyes
I shut it anyway to hear his voice
I tried searching using my hearing
As to whom the voice I fell in love with belong

Alas! I heard and ask his name
I found myself no shame
But then I saw a frame
They looked just like the same

This man in front of me
And the man on the frame in front of us
They were brothers and both doctor,
Isn’t it cool?
This man phones ring and he answered the call

That’s when I realized
That this man is just a new
And the man on the frame is the one I knew
The person whom I fell in love more times than a few

I saw the two dates written on the picture
It’s the info’s my mind can’t seem to picture
Or maybe I just don’t want to figure
The truth behind the picture

Then that man pops out beside me
And say my brother now resides in heaven
He’s famous and he enjoys life more than anyone else
And was filled with love more than anyone else

There may be this one regret
Because my brother fell in love but cannot convey
Because the girl he loves is on the verge of death
As he touched her hand in heavy breathe

Hearing this man says those words
Made my heart as hard as ice
As cold as a bloke of ice
Now we can never meet in the eyes…

Its already late when i learned
that i have fallen in-love w/o  knowing
now regret enveloped my entirety
i can no longer tell her how much i love her
i can no longer say i need her
im too much late
so late i cant accept it..

In my life
I had met and encountered people
In and outside the house
Everyday we pass through one another
Everyday we laughed and talked
Everytime, I thought of only one thing
Was I able to left a mark on their heart?
Something that will live with them
Something that will make them remember me
Even when I'm gone
Something that will make them say  "thanks god, I met her"

I'm scared and I'm seeing my heart scattered on the ground..
No one is pickling up the pieces
It was only being stumbled and consecutively being stepped on..

Ridding on the Wind

As new born life comes
And replaces the old life on the ground
The remains never really stay
As life depart
Its like the soul riding on the wind
You'll never know where the wind will take you
Its either will return you to where you've always been
Or take you to your last destination
When you're riding on the wind
You will never get bored
But you will get scared instead
It will flashback all the things you have done
& all the things you haven't done
All the things you want done
& all the things you don’t want to do but have done instead
When you're riding on the wind
Happiness, Sadness, Anger & Regret
You'll not understand the head or the tail of where those emotions were from
You may have the idea but the meaning behind it is all unknown
When you're riding on the wind
Whether you like it or not
Seeing your love ones cry
Hearing them shout
Knowing all the pains you have given them
Yet happy being with you around
You’ll helplessly and a bit hopelessly
Nodding as you go to the end of the line
Abiding in the wind with bitter and sweet tears of joy

I was told to always keep you safe
That I must take good care of you
That i should not make you cry
That I'm lucky you have found me
That of all people you choose me
Forgive me if I'm being too paranoid sometimes
If I'm being too protective like our very own mothers
Well you see, I'm just a girl trying to become a knight
So that I could protect my princess
I'm your girlfriend after all,
I just hope we would last forever
Knowing there is no such thing, only as long as we live
Haha! Who would have really thought?
We would sway this way?
But baby, I love you so much that I want you to take good care of yourself even more
Trust me, all I could ever do is stay
And promise that I'm yours alone and you're mine.
As long as there is us, I will love only you
But if ever you want me to stop.
Just say so...
And if not then I shall continue

She who doubt herself never gone outside
Afraid if she does
She might make mistakes
However never in her wildest dream did she know
What's waiting outside
Is a helping hand
A friend who silently looks out for her
Waiting that once she walk outside her comfort zone
She will be welcome with the sweetest smile
And a warmest hug
A friend who loves her so dearly

Love has always been a part of me
When I met that man I thought
“Yes, it might be him“
My Mr. Right

Seeing him happily walking in front of me
I thought “aww he’s just right in front of me, what a great day”
No wait, I look again, I saw him really happy
Taking his time walking happily

Walking happily with the girl beside him
So just like that I got mad and run away
Without knowing the truth I hated and resented the girl
Poor girl, unknowingly I hated her