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Honesty is so freeing
but so terrifying

Like bungee jumping,
with the pure sweet adrenaline
pumping through your bones
telling you you'll be okay,
you'll be okay,

You're okay.

That's why
I'm still wavering
on the edge of the cliff
feeling the tight straps around my legs,
knowing I will be caught
when I fall
but still seeing the
thousand foot drop beneath me.
 May 2014 Laura Mankowski
Tea
I shall never admit
that all of my breaths
and heartbeats
are meant
only for you

I shall never admit
that all of my stars
and galaxies
I've saved
only for you

I shall never admit
that I've spent sleepless nights
leaving my whispers and tears
on my pillow
only for you

I shall never admit
that I was often speechless
while my knees, so restless,
buckled
only for you

I shall never admit
that for days I dreamed awake
and countless verses
I made
only for you

I shall never admit
that I will write, eternally
that this heart will bleed, internally
hopelessly
only for you
*my love
And I shall never admit any of these things, especially not to you.
forget the drugs. yeah, they’re going
around and yeah, they’re pretty
dangerous, but they don’t take as many
lives. stop searching kids’
lockers and start looking for the deeper
stuff, the things that leave heavier
inflictions. yeah, i
know it’s nearly one
hundred degrees outside, and
there’s girls in here wearing
long sleeved sweaters. they’re
hiding something more
sinister, something
that can’t be measured in
kilos.
a hidden, sweet animosity
licks my brain into submission
whips and chains in position
tears my veins into visions
old scar incisions
with surgical precision
the mission is over now
how did I get left out?
conscience fades into haze
lost distances, emotions enslaved
I won't see her face again,
fall back into strangers
unless we pretend
we can exist or be friends
our love was pretense
expensive, and didn't make sense
but it slept in my heart
so soundly, so comfortably
we were never apart
so swiftly, so effortlessly
we fall all the way
back to the start
her lips were my paintbrush
our love was an art
the broken and the breaking
and the taking of trust
and the faking of lust
our hands fell apart, into dust
now buried in the soil
underneath the earths crust
planted here we will stay
out of reach, out of the way
to wither in denial
and collapse in decay
I can still see her, distant
and I can't look away
decimated I fall to my knees
and refuse to believe
I'm just one of the trees now
planted and broken
my limbs turn to stone
if I can't leave this place
then I might die alone.
turn back to me, see me
see the glint in my eyes
one final goodbye
one final first sight
in the middle of the night
I can't help but try
my eyes closed in stone
so I can't even cry
my heart has broke open
memories frozen in time
if you can't tell me why...
then please...
tell me goodbye.
 May 2014 Laura Mankowski
Maria
Like cold coffee, the fun of the taste is gone.
too cold, just like my feelings
All Alone.
no one drink it, they refuse to add hot coffee on it and fix it
instead they throw it away and replace it
they did the same.
my heart felt like a cold coffee
but when I'm with you...
you made me feel better, you drink me even though I'm cold and you drink my sadness away
I guess you could call it poetic how by the age of 12 I had no recollection of what happiness tasted like on my tongue. Some would say it was tragically beautiful.
But it was not poetic, nor was it beautiful,  but it was tragic. It was so very, very sad, and that sadness is only doubled now that people see sorrow as glorious.  It is not glorious. It is not strength. It is a lump of iron in your chest and stomach and it eats you from the inside, out and you have no right to think that blood stained wrists are anything other than tragic. So very,  very tragic.
 May 2014 Laura Mankowski
Marian
Sometimes I Wish
I Could Just Disappear

*~Marian~
Random 7w Poem....
Hope You Enjoy It!!! :) ~~~~<3
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