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 Jan 2015 Girl On The Wing
Renee
Was going through my saved photos,
found the ones of you and me
the ones of me, you, your best friend, and someone I don't talk to anymore
and god ******* ****
I never knew I could miss someone so much as I do now
I don't know why,
just at the low point of remembering
someone I used to love,
an old best friend of mine,
and a girl I never talked to due to jealousy
It's funny how so much can change in two months.
I never thought,
that I'd get to this point
I'm a disgrace to myself,
I'm not supposed to care,
but when I find an old photo like this,
my heart breaks...
 Jan 2015 Girl On The Wing
Renee
Today you said
you were ashamed of me,
that you didn't know why I existed..
you called me an anorexic *****
you told me I wasn't good at anything
and I was going to amount to nothing
you called me a depressed brat
well I'm sorry I seem that way
today you said you hated me,
to your friends
but today I heard.
And I didn't expect it.
but I didn't cry...
I didn't hate you...
I didn't respond...
I just walked outside
in the freezing snow
and made myself numb.
today you said I was worthless
and I've never deserved anything
or anyone
and today
I'm not sorry I don't meet your expectations
I want someone to look me in the eyes
like nothing else matters

I want to wake up to him
or a text from him or something more
than the empty feeling in my chest

I want someone to share random thoughts with

I want him to pull me into
his jacket and zip us up inside

I want to talk to someone
about theories, ethics, words,
the universe and more

I want someone to call me at one in the morning
and tell me to look at Polaris

I want him to pick me up unexpectedly
and make me laugh hysterically until I snort

I want someone to trade literature with,
sleep in with, cuddle with

I want someone to miss me when we're apart
Even if it was all fake, I still miss the little things.
- - -
He was always the perfect lie...
What's beauty's value
Pretty souls don't have price tags
You can buy makeup
aaaand yet I still wish I were pretty. Idk, I hate to think I'm caving to society's pathetic values of beauty, but I just WISH I could be physically beautiful. It is always the physically gorgeous people who say "Everyone is beautiful inside!", but they don't know how it feels to be naturally UGLY. Then again, I still don't understand the logic behind it. I mean, beauty is something you can freaking BUY! You get some makeup and a beautician, some practice and you're set. One day, I personally want to find someone with a pretty soul, if they happen to have a pretty face too then that's great, but souls are the most important as far as I'm concerned. Those are things you can't buy, you need to make them yourself out of your choices and the values you choose to prioritize. Maybe that's just me, but you know. yeah. anyway.
She rises at night,
As new or full,
And she pulls him to his feet.

He rises at the sight of her,
A reflection of her old self,
Yet still illuminated
In her inconsistent darkness.

When she is unbalanced
He aches to compensate,
Attempts to return her kindness,
But he is left merely trying,
With her unsure of dying.

For the moon can raise the tide,
But the tide can't light the moon.
Might do more about this or something similar.

For the one who calls me his moon.
---
 Jan 2015 Girl On The Wing
Harsh
I spell “I love you” on the lines of your collarbone

and I always try to go from one end to another,
brushing calligraphy strokes with my tongue
and blotting your skin as a page with my lips.

I never really have finished saying it,
and I guess I never will

my motions are lost among your curves
and my lips almost always end up
meeting yours somewhere in the middle.
 Jan 2015 Girl On The Wing
Piglet
Everybody that comes here day in day out and bears their souls, often with no response, yet still they come, because in some quiet way it helps. You know who's awesome?
All of us.
So there!
 Jan 2015 Girl On The Wing
Steele
F**k butterflies, my stomach has birds in it.
My body's shaking, my heart is racing, my pulse is high.
You're gorgeous, and I woke up this morning with a zit.
How'd a girl like you settle for a "me" kind of guy?

I'm usually witty, but my words don't work well for this.
It's just that you're so pretty, you make my knees weak!
At the end of the date, my pulse hit five-fifty.
I realize it's lame that I asked for permission before we kissed...
I was just trying to take the time to aim for your lips.
See, the funny part is...

                                       I was afraid I might miss.
Butterflies in your stomach is a good thing, right?
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