Feel as tired
As a bird at the edge of space
No mind
No body
No race

Sometimes I feel like a *******
That was ******* from a dog
That ate a *******
From a dog that ate a *******
That was ******* from a dog
That ate a *******
From a dog that ate a *******
That was ******* from a dog
That ate a *******

Perpetual Shittyness

I watch and
On a star light night
For a falling Star
As a confirmation
That an ambition
Will prove to be positive

If I see one
My confidence
Is improved
Yet I still know it is a wish
That I make as it falls
Not an action

After all it
Could be space junk falling
Or the fragments’ of a jet airliner shot down
Kind takes the fun right out of it
Wishing on
A shooting star

Does every moment of pleasure,
Have to be reduced an equal amount of pain?
One can be lulled into this false notion
If they choose

Nature dictates no!
Pleasure exists as a reward
While pain signifies damage

I prefer
Seeking the elusive happy medium
A true balance

An unquantifiable flux,
Never equaling the same value
From one moment in time
To the next

Inner peace
Like a circle
It never ends

or
Pave the Planet Earth

Not too long ago
It was just Harvest time
That the farthest distance
Was traveled from home
Perishable bounty
Had to get to market on time
In the progress
Of wheeling and dealing
Cash crop
While still fresh
Before its value dropped
Only the Horse and Buggy Doctor
Would need to travel
Any farther or faster
The rest of the year
Trading his service to protect life
For tangible scarce resources
Without shifting a gear

The tendril trees
Girdled, rootless, leafless, and lifeless
Planted Along trails
Blazed by the pony Express
DOT DOT DOT
DASH DASH DASH
DOT DOT DOT
Information fast

The tethered tress
Link each house online
So that lights will burn
Talk is text

Manners dictate it to be rude
Don't ring the phone at five
Its dinner time
Sadly
No one is home

Its the modern family plan
Rarely if ever is everyone
Together at once
The hearth is cold
The head of the table empty
No one is home

Da da ling da da ling da da ling
Hello Leave a message at the beep
Beep

The connected age
A virtual world of
Artificial togetherness

Teaming with life
A stand of trees
Anchor the atmosphere
To earth
As she breaths
Winter wood
Bare Branches
Summer growth
Green leaves
Give life to loam
Change light to nourish
Give well to the future
Together to flourish
On this planet
Humanities home

Just released from the sanitarium
Cold cruel empty world took me down
Malnourished, tooth  abscesses'
Manic Depression
Isolation
Brought me to the brink a bad state of melancholy
I went to a hospital ER for help
They don't do dental work
Dentists are Satan in disguise
The AMA knows this and won't let them in their
Genuine Doctors' tribunals

I got released with the bogus diagnosis of ****** abuse
I told them I took the medicine cabinet drank a quart of ***** and that would be it.
THE END
You have heard of Catch 22 here's Catch 23
If your in the nut house for a failed attempted suicide
All you have to do to get out is say I don't feel suicidal any more.
That easy.

A foreshadow to this poem.

Industry took away my know how
I couldn't make my own shoes
I couldn't make a yoke to mount the ox I don't have
To plow the back 40 I'll never own
If my life depended on it

I can't build a house of logs
Would die quickly without central utilities
Food would vanish after days of no electricity
People protect there own and I'm a lone
So I pray I am not the first to go

I  try to be a human being
The best was I can
Trying to see through the muck
With prayers, and great hopes
And Luck
I hope I can continue to be.

A human being

Why am I?
Who do I ask?
God, Allah, Buddha, L. Ron Hubbard
I am sure Jesus would have the answer.
But he was crucified.
Isn't a sin.

I better hurry and think of something better to do.
I am no wise guy.
I am old and washed up.
Besides the Nuns at school
Always said
An idle mind is the devil's work-shop.

Never could small talk
Clumsy awkward and disheveled
Fitted in by fitting out

This is no perfect other for me I'm convinced
I'm to old
Broke
Tired
Weird and can't carry a thought to fruition


All of my life I have been looking
Hoping to find a lover
She must have not been born

Scary thought dying without next of kin
Then again there will be no sorry and pain
No grieving
Which is good

With pure passion
I salute to the American flag

In the fabric of our flag
I see more than three colors

Each fiber has the essence
Of American pride

She radiates a revelation
Of strength and integrity

For  Patriots Protecting
The Freedom She represents

I  hear the anthem
Our flag proudly declares

She sings as she is flying high
Of life and liberty

A a certain future
Free of despair

It is now a new Day
The sun will shine when it rises
The day is ahead of the light
Say it is today now
Even with No Sunlight

Today started without it
Strongly enough
The birds seem to start there day
Just a bit before the sun rise
About 4AM

Surely there are people without electricity
Their day goes from can to can't
See

Photons Take 70,000 years to reach
The Surface of the Sun
From it's Molten Core
Then 8 Hours from there to lend light to day

There must be a reason for night and day
Life and death
Or
Is this serendipity
I doubt that all we know as existence and consciousness
Is not supposed to be it is.

Jesus said to the Disables
When they wanted to know what [ was] the buzz] ('Andrew Loud Weber, and Tim Race "Jesus Christ Superstar')
Jesus said  "why think about bout tomorrow
Today is at hand"

Why complicate things.

It we develop way
To travel faster than the speed of light
Then we would have to discover how to make
Light  travel faster than the speed of light
Or else
How could we see

My heart aches with pain
Your happy little soul has grown big bitter
It is as if a split second ago
I look into your 4 year old eyes of innocence
And felt bitter sweet sorrow
Knowing
Life was careless and content
For you at that moment
Now 18 years of life has passed
Your jaded
What is it all for
Count me Among the clueless
In moments
your a man
I am an old man
Joy is fleeting
I was an accident
You were planned
I cared then and now
I worried long before you were born
Anguished with thoughts
That if I had a child I would shield him from the
Pain and sorrow of
The broken family isolation and helplessness
I felt
I was an accident that caused a family
That's broken
I
Cry
Alone
The tears of a rat *******
An ugly unwanted freak of nature
Never could fit it
In
Will never be able
To go home

If I don't think about it
It won't hurt so much
But
There it is
Aching
An intangible pain
In an imaginary heart
If I don't think about it
It won't hurt so much
A mantra
To chant away the
Sorry
Time and tomorrow
Is my only hope
Things all fall into place so
Serenity will come

The openly defiant offensive measures
And the agonizing indignant actions
Are ardent attempts to cling tightly
To the peace of mind set
And the faith
Trust in the fact
That God loves not hates
My arms flailing half crazed
In a frantic open hug
As Tears of guilt and shame
Soaked with fear flow down
From my eyes closed tight
Help cleanse the pain
And soak out the hurt
An attempt to save my soiled love
Kling to what little  happiness remains
In my non reciprocated refrain of why so bold
Now deferred away in a silenced
Sound of love gone cold