i fell asleep thinking about him,

but i woke up thinking about her.

we never spend time together because you always say you "don't have time" or you're "too busy".

but if you really loved me wouldn't you make time to be with me?

or are you "too busy" to love me too

YOURE SO BEAUTIFUL AND ALL I WANT IS YOU AND I AM POSITIVELY IN LOVE WITH YOU BUT ITS UNREQUITED LOVE AND IT HURTS SO BAD AND IM SO SICK OF ALL THIS PAIN AND I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO OR WHY IM STILL IN LOVE WITH YOU

all i wanna do is take care of you and make you happy.

i can feel my heart breaking and there is nothing i want more than you

every headache is cancer
every heartburn is a heart attack
every bug bite is poisonous

every thought is a boulder
every thought is a gong
every thought is a hundred

every breath is my last
every sleep isn't enough
every ache is never ending

every touch feels like more
all my pain is never ending
I can't take it anymore

her eyes look so deeply into mine, I can feel the warm burn even when she's gone
I know she sees my soul and feels it
DEEP
inside

we can talk without speaking
we can feel without touching
we can know without seeing

every ounce of her is filled with the purist beauty I've ever known

she spins around my mind like a planet and makes me dizzy with lust

she is the moon, venus and all the stars and I will always be in awe

inside her there's a rumble, not a fire or a tornado
but a rumble that keeps her moving
but its soft and slow and is sometimes mistaken for stillness
but even when she is still I feel the pebbles rolling across the ground
she levitates above is all
but her roots connect thousands of acres
she knows everyone
she feels everyone
she hears everyone
but sometimes she gets lost in her own rumble and cannot hear herself

It has taken me a long time to heal
And I am still getting better
But I have grown

I again am filled with hope

Again there is room for love

I am not afraid of dying alone

I feel capable and worthy and free

when the sun goes down i think of you more and the pain grows stronger

maybe that's why i hate winter so much

because the darkness comes sooner

and everytime it comes I find my self thinking

"isn't it too early for this pain"

i love it when the sun is setting and all the trees turn black
something about the dark outlines are so beautiful and there's nothing i love more
except you
you are the marvelous sunset behind those black trees
filled with hues of pink and orange and purple and yellow and blue all mixed together into one thing that is way to beautiful to even be real
but it is real and all you wanna do is save it and hold on to it forever but you can't
because eventually the sun will set and you will be left with black wishing for all those hues to come back
no memories or pictures could ever really capture it's beauty
that's how i feel about you
you are the sunset behind the black trees but i know you won't last forever so i'm going to admire you for as long as i can
until eventually my whole world turns black