I know I'm awful
And I hate my choices
And I hate myself
And you should hate me too
But that doesn't justify
You using me
As a place holder
A side ***
I'm not someone
You can just have
So you can say
you have someone
I will not talk to you
I don't like your voice
Not anymore
But I need you none the less
Because without someone
I feel like I am alone
And being alone
Is the worst thing in my world
So I do need you
I need you
To deal with me
To break it apart
So I don't have the choice
Of putting it
*Back together
I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT MY LIFE IS AND JACOB IS A ***** THAT CAN GO DIE IN A HOPE BECAUSE I HATE HIM SO MUCH AND HE IS ULTA MY FRIENDS AND HE MAKE THEM FEEL BAD AND I CANT DEAL ANYMORE WITH THAT *** THAT THINKS HE'S WORTH MORE THAN ME BECAUSE IF ANYTHING HE IS SHALLOW AND ONLY LIKES ME BECAUSE IM CONFUSED AND DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING SO WHY CANT HE JUST BREAK UP WITH ME HE SAYS HE LOVES ME NO NO YOU DONT YOU'RE 14 OKAY? YEAH I KNOW YOK CAN SIT HERE ALL DAY AND EXPLAINABLE TO ME WHAT LOVE IS BUT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT LOVE YOU SO DONT ESPECT ME TO SAY IT! AND WHEN IM TALKING TO YOU ABOUT ANXIETY DONT SAY "just don't think about it" YEAH I ******* KNOW IM TRYING NOT TO BUT YOU DONT UNDERSTAND THAT U CANT STOP AND THATS WHY I CANT BREATHE YOU SUFFICATE ME AND TAKE MY AIR SO THAT YPU CAN BREATHE BETTER! YOU LIKE THIS OTHER GIRL AND YET YOU ASK ME OUT BECAUSE YOU KNOW I AM TOO WEAK TO SAY NO! THATS A ******* MOVE! AND GO A HEAD DONT TALK TO ME FOR A WEEK SEE IF I GIVE A ****! IM NOT THE ONE THAT NEEDS Constant ******* ATTENTION!!!!! I'm sorry for the rant