you kissed me at CODA
and I remembered who I was -
when the world was my ocean,
before they put me in a tank -
my soul was parched for open water
so you grabbed my face and
we dove down deep below
and in the deepest parts of the sea
we've found what we already know

heartfelt notes springing out
from tough strings beneath the pads of my fingers
gently holding a wooden bow
that sways to the sound it produces
creating sounds of somber joy
and terraced tones creating
a magnificent cacophony
that makes my heart soar
chin resting on glowing wood
my violin creates a secret world.

No one faced it as Picasso
With such an honesty
Baring the truth of
Simply wearing out.
His last portraits,
Full of anxiety,
Eyes laden with fear,
But at least he had it,
That creativity,
To give each day a point.
And what he left us all
Was more than beauty
But the humanity
Shared by all
To take us safely
Home.

Love Mary x


Love Mary ***

I can't sleep
Everytime I remember your words
They snap and recoil
And hurt me awake
Next time when someone
Promises me forever
I'll just smile
Look them in the eyes and ask
How long is forever to you.

her eyes were never the color of my coffee that started my day
they were never the shade of honey when the light found them
never that rushing color of falling leaves in the middle of autumn that made you hope for something special
they were never all the things i found in them, comparing each fleck of color to something beautiful
after all, they were just brown

ೋღ❤ღೋೋღ❤ღೋ

Walking down a wooded path
tall flowing trees all around,
I came upon the river’s edge
and sat down on the ground.

Sitting at the edge of the river
I stare at its ongoing flow,
I start to give it all my pain
a release with each little throw.

My hardest pain is fear
that I’ve had from so long ago,
of never feeling good enough
that’s dulled my inner glow.

It eats at me like a cancer
each and every day,
the fear of never being good enough
and again being thrown away.

Years of disappointment and abuse
only being property, nothing to love,
but always trying to make things right
so everyone else could rise above.

I throw this fear out into the river
sit back and watch it pass slowly by,
I wrap my arms around myself
feel the release, let myself cry.

I throw out all the other pains
betrayal, heartache, loneliness and more,
I watch them drift gently way
these last tears will be left on this river shore.

Noticing as each and every pain
slowly floats down the river away,
I observe at a distance
as they fade into the suns sparkling rays.

Walking down a wooded path
tall flowing trees all around,
I came upon the river’s edge
and was surprised at what I found.

And ever onward shall we strive
and from the circle peace derive.
The sea in robes of mossy green
and blues the eye has never seen...
In grays that mock the stormy sky
and depths that hold the tears gone by....

A sweet release we give our heart
from pain of past that tore apart,
relief that only one can find
when hearts we let, become unconfined,
to leave behind those stormy skies
letting self-love baptize…

A tide of tears resides within
and waits to overflow.
i greet with a smiling face
so others will not know.

How feeble is this masquerade.
Transparent are the games.
Emotions should be given room
without the chides and blames.

The time will come to open up
and let the dam release...
my will, the pressure stop.
my soul will be at peace.

Weep when grief prescribes.
Laugh for humor's sake.
Love with everything you have
and forgive, all your mistakes.

ೋღ❤ღೋೋღ❤ღೋ

P h y s i c a l l y  T o u c h  M e  A n d
I t s  I n s t a n t  E l e c t r i c i t y
T r y  T o  T o u c h  M y  M i n d  A n d
I t s  I n s t a n t  S t a t i c
T r y  T o  G e t  M e  T o  F e e l  A n d
Y o u ' l l  F i n d  N o t h i n g

B e c a u s e  I  A m A̶̷̸m̶̷̸b̶̷̸e̶̷̸r̶̷̸

̶P̶h̶y̶s̶i̶c̶a̶l̶l̶y̶ ̶T̶o̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶M̶e̶ ̶A̶n̶d̶
̶W̶a̶t̶c̶h̶ ̶M̶e̶ ̶S̶h̶y̶ ̶W̶a̶y̶
̶T̶r̶y̶ ̶T̶o̶ ̶T̶o̶u̶c̶h̶ ̶M̶y̶ ̶M̶i̶n̶d̶ ̶A̶n̶d̶
̶W̶a̶t̶c̶h̶ ̶M̶e̶ ̶C̶h̶a̶n̶g̶e̶
̶T̶r̶y̶ ̶T̶o̶ ̶G̶e̶t̶ ̶M̶e̶ ̶T̶o̶ ̶F̶e̶e̶l̶ ̶A̶n̶d̶
̶Y̶o̶u̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶B̶e̶ ̶O̶v̶e̶r̶w̶h̶e̶l̶m̶e̶d̶ ̶

̶B̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ ̶I̶ ̶A̶m̶ ̶ O̶̷̸c̶̷̸t̶̷̸o̶̷̸b̶̷̸e̶̷̸r̶̷̸

PHYSICALLY TOUCH ME AND
YOU'LL SEE MY FIST
TRY TO TOUCH MY MIND AND
YOU'LL RUN AWAY IN FEAR
TRY TO GET ME TO FEEL AND
YOU'LL SEE WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE

BECAUSE I AM S̶̷̸T̶̷̸E̶̷̸L̶̷̸L̶̷̸A̶̷̸

Physically touch me and
Be ready for to much love
Try to touch my mind and
Be ready to cry a little
Try to get me to feel and
You'll watch me feel nothing

Because I am S̶̷̸t̶̷̸e̶̷̸p̶̷̸h̶̷̸a̶̷̸n̶̷̸i̶̷̸e̶̷̸
And I am Numb

Love isn't blind,
blind are those,
who never loved.