forever; anti-never
and I sever hearts that measure
not so clever, my hands tether
butterfly flutter, changing weather
birds of feather, my endeavor
open kevlar when I met her
cupid's quiver, better get her
stupid picture, wet in gutter
letter lover, better ever
let her, love her, now or never
red her lips, that make me stutter
yet her kisses, soft as butter
hands together, soul that suffers
empty vessel, no more clutter
enter bodies into blender
piece by pieces all dismembered
open heart you let her render
cut her heart, and made her tremble
nothing left, feeling better
nothing left, I can't remember
dreader, just another pleasure
deader, just like sunken treasure.

You're like a book I never want to put down,
where every page I turn pulls me deep into a place
where I realize that turning back for air
would be an impossible journey to make.
So I've accepted this as my fate.
There is no plan B, in fact there isn't even a plan A.
I've exhausted all those options.
I'm to the point where the only letter
I care about making plans for is U.
If you took just a glace at my latest chapter,
you'd see every letter, word, and sentence is this.
People are getting tired of hearing it but
I am far from tired of letting people know that
I am done with dreaming only in my sleep.
I must become the dream
where you draw the inspiration from
that keeps your quill in motion.
I want to live in your story
like every day was never-ending.
Just please don't ask me to be your knight in shining armor
because I don't care how shiny it is,
I'm never going to wear it when I have you in my arms.
And I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't completely scared of that idea,
but a long time ago I made a vow to scare myself at least once day.
And I'm not saying that you're simply just a means to an end,
I'm trying to say that you are the end and
I feel bad for whatever means to get in my way to reaching you.
Scared? You bet your *** I am.
But I think that's just the universe's way of breathing life back into me.
So let me fall deeper into your pages
till I am left without any air in my lungs
and I begin to see stars,
because your universe now
is the only place I care to draw breath from.

It had been scorching from a time I can’t seem to recall anymore and lately your words had been ice cold but instead of saving us you held your breath and jumped off this burning ship into waters I refused to swim in. Inevitability is talk of the future but no one can see past the choices they don’t understand so I’ve been standing under a gray sky instead trying to cheer the clouds up with echoes off a sweet tongue that fall on absent company. The sky may be out of reach so instead I’ll reach for the stars in hopes that I touch a cloud on the way who may join tears with mine as we douse your lingering flames. What will be left of this broken ship worries me not for I know it will still move. Where it drifts I cannot say, but I understand now that perhaps sailing to nowhere may just be the perfect place to find myself.

A voice echoes through the cracks in my skull.
Lost dreams down a spiraling black hole.

Chasing shadows cast from heart,
finding light disguised as dark.

Dirt and worms fall from sky.
Crossing hearts with hopes to die.

Killer b-line straight to the brain.
A body’s lost mind makes the soul insane.

Feeding on humanity to save my own,
pulsing with life then turning to stone.

Deadly teeth sink past her skin,
where our zombie apocalypse begins.

A promise of love till death do us part,
A promise perhaps where death is the start.

There is something about the voices in the wind, no?
How they can whisper sweet nothings through comb tooth cracks.
When you reach one hand to the future
and one hand to the past
you forget about present flight.
Featherless birds with eye lids shut,
can you hear the secrets
as they slink inside your ears
and slide behind your eyes returning the sparkle once lost?
Do you see it now?
If you dream of freefalling you will always wake up flying.
Trust the winds
because landing is the tricky part.

Have you ever said "Hi" to the sunset
and have him say "Hi" back?
As to unpack his rays,  
he decides to stay with you
and glaze his hues
across fluffy warms clouds
and a sky once blue.
Like he's happy to see you too.
And to send a message to the moon
to "Stop running away!
'Cause no matter where you go
in this Milky Way,  
I will always melt your gloom.
You know I'm not very good with goodbyes,
so let's just say I'll see you soon."

He created it free hand with a shackled mind and misplaced the key in a pocket he never did like reaching into. Creating a decadent falsity as it kidnapped the truth to a place begging too high a ransom. He only painted with his heart, something he had been perfecting his entire life. Drawing blood to draw with blood left him light in the head and weak in the knees though he kept painting on the canvas, and with passion and ache paint till his palette became parched. A masterpiece he would say while others saw naught but a blank canvas no matter how hard he tried making them fall in love. Though something was missing, something had always been missing but what? He lost himself days on end working to make the beauty in his mind a reality. The days turned into months while the months turned into seconds.  He was pulled to the dangerous place he had always pushed away, squeezing the very last drop his heart could bare until the heart itself became bare, ceasing to move. Before he could make the final stroke he fell weak onto the frosty floor, laying in the shadow of the canvas. With tired eyes and  a vacant heart he finally understood the missing element to his masterpiece. And with his final breath, the last thing his eyes would ever see in this world was the canvas . . . completely empty as the man he became.

some things go without being said
and some things leave in the same manner . . .  
the door is still opened
i kicked it off of its hinges
what’s the point of having a door
if you keep it closed all the time
right . . ?
and what’s the point of having kevlar
if you’re too lazy to attach the straps
right . . ?
i have more attachment issues than hair on my head
because life has always left me cliffhanging off the ends of ellipses' . . .
i can’t be around people for extended periods
probably because they breath too much
and i would much rather be alone underwater
or at least deep enough to where light becomes afraid of dark
even though light never gave him a chance . . .

Treading eyes
Afloat from a pool of liquor
As the liver overloads.
A hand
Around a red cusp traces mine,
Clocking hearts in for overtime.
The burning of a
Gaze overtaking
The cherry suns,
Warming inhibition.
So on occasions rare
It only takes two eyes to see what thirty cannot.
Eyes locking lashes
Lassoing souls together.
Two bodies bow tied to one.
Stitching fingers to perfection
With hands
Creating a cocoon around her chest.
Waiting for her wings to grow.

A heart is pulled at opposite ends then twisted until all its tears are rung.

Tears that drop one by one
From twist by twist,
Forming an ocean of tears
throughout the years.

The force that pulls,
Drops the heart in this
Very ocean until it
Sinks to the very

b

   o

     t

       t

         o

           m

               in a place it will stay forgotten . . .
                                                               ­         . . .
                                                               ­              . . . and yet the heart remains dry.

I want to say yes but I’m hung up on the no’s.
Open chest, I digest, then digress to find a home.
No black and white choices like a checkmate toe-to-toe.
Broken glass inside the ring, the reflection of my own.
I wonder if its tears or I wonder if it’s sweat,
Only thing remaining clear are the clouds inside my head.
Like a brainy haze it’s rainy days everywhere I stay,
So if I ever land from high its guaranteed delays.
And I pay, and I pay till the flesh from heart decays.
Blood that turns to water never grows a rose bouquet.
It’s not okay because the roses, she always loved the most,
My hands open up where thorns and pedals juxtapose.
Mother Nature has opposed, and goes to numb my tipping toes,
As I fall into a hole and fold myself to fit the mold.
Getting old from selling souls to people like it was my own,
Behold this heart I newly stole, its beating I postponed.
And proposed she may just never know, I’m destined all alone.
No turning houses into homes, its more like catacombs.
As I roam through the cemetery tripped on sticks and stones,
Falling chest first onto a pile made of bones.
****** stick into my skin as I’m threaded by the thorns,
Of wilted roses stemming from the past I never mourned.
Nevermore to see the light of love while buried from the floor,
On this battlefield of sin within a prisoner of war.

Treading on new ground, tumbledown I fear the worst
With hands clenching tightly like the backdoor of a hearse
And what’s worse becomes the knot from which my stomach will not drop
As it is tied too tightly to a being near forgot
The choices that I’ve made become the ones that never stop
Moving in reverse my curse, ahead of me is blocked
By a body absent pulse where the soul has left its host
Haunted by the light then disappearing like a ghost
And like most I’m left idle gears changing, carriage coasts
To a path in lieu of solitude, the path I never chose
Dousing sparks now depart, ignition gone as pistons slow
Shifting stars becoming clouds, heaven high no longer glows
Wheels stop, crippled clock, as both headlights now explode
Swinging door, stitches torn, walk the path away from home
Shield stripped, one way trip to a throne that’s made of bones
Body pale, life derailed, the only life I’ve ever known
Cold water cuts the sky, broken tears of angels cry
Now carving out my flesh, pooling blood till vessels dry
With the body at my feet, the body’s heart would not comply
Oh that body at my feet, oh that body it was mine.

Of all the things I could imagine
I could never conjure up
Something as breath taking as yourself
With eyes wide shut I see many shades of you
But confined I am
To only the colors of the rainbow on my palette
I have not your heavenly hues nor the steady hand
To even begin to trace your masterpiece
Free hand with shackled mind
To the prison of mere imagination
Your face is the key to my cell
Your hands the key to my heart
And your soul bears the key to a life of never-ending color
A life I've spent my entire existence searching for
And I could be completely wrong about this
In fact I always have been in my history
But I'm done being the historian
Whos eyes are always shut to the future
While stuck to the past
It is time to blow dust from the pages of present
And hold your hands while writing in colors not of this world
To create a life with you that is equal in nature
So you mustn't ask me to rely on imagination
In creating your duplication because in every case
Your truth will always be boundlessly
More beautiful than fiction
And I shall never limit myself
To the colors of this world
When you created from the heavens that lie above it

Tracing the tattoos on your arm with the pupils of my eyes
Should I touch
The night is getting older
The mistakes I haven’t made yet are making me anxious
The conversation I’m hiding from you is beginning to make my lips turn blue
But you have become exceedingly good at turning them purple
Merging my misery with your happiness
Finding the average in a not-so-average pair
Remaining too close for comfort
While comfortably numb to both yesterday and tomorrow’s heart ache
I’m scared because you make me feel
You make me think
You make me someone other than the man I used to be
And I’m having trouble deciding if that’s a good or bad thing right now
The good news today is that I always see you in my dreams
The bad news tomorrow is that I may forever see you in my nightmares

What doesn’t come out of your mouth,
Will come out of your ***.
So make sure that what you say counts,
And everything you don’t will pass.

Today I went out in the world and I was alone
But you were in my mind as etched onto stone
And it felt like a home you were holding my hand
As we saw so many places as dreams that expand
On the stroll we saw hills rolling lush with green emeralds
And white fabled stallions wild out of their stables
You looked into my eyes and saw something that was fatal
But not in a bad way, just beautifully disabled
Vulnerability like a newborn that’s safe in my cradle
Like resurrection, a prophecy, your head held a halo
So I held you ever closely as the sun began set
We were sitting on a bench and no words needed said
As reflexes dawned onto you I was drawn
Two heart beats in sync, two lips formed a bond
And when we opened our eyes we tickled clouds in the sky
Freefalling through space, laws of physics defied
I reached into your chest and pulled both of us inside
And bound as we found a cocoon to reside
No death do we part if our life be denied
So when we break free to the heavens we will fly

I am cold. I am alone. I am empty. It wasn’t always like this. You see-
That one day you brought me a bouquet of flowers but I didn’t even notice them sitting next to me.
That one day you decided to wrap my hand with the warmth of yours but I wouldn’t return the favor.
That one day you tried to hug me tight and I left you too much slack to hold on to.
That one day you wanted someone to cry with but I didn't spare you a single drop.
That one day you finally told me how you really felt but I wouldn’t listen to your words anymore.
That one day you decided to give me our first real kiss but my heart just wasn't in it.
That one day, was one day too late for me because-
That one day is actually today, and today I am cold. I am alone. I am empty.
But you see it wasn’t always like this . . .

Yesterday I would have shared my entire world if you'd have let me but today, today I am dead.