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Jan 4 · 43
Breathe In, Hold On
birdy Jan 4
I went to that bridge,
the one nobody knows.
To stand on the railing,
in my pretty white clothes.
Then imagine the falling, falling,
the letting go…

Have my sins be forgiven
by the deep blue waters.
To which so many
lose sons and daughters.

thrashing away.

I find myself still alive.
But beaten up enough,
that it’s easy to give in,
hard to survive.

An open escape,
yet I’m still desperately pleading.
Gasping for air to
breathe in,
breathe in and hold on.

Hold onto the sorrow.
Hold onto the pain.
Hold onto the life that drives you insane.
Feel the tension,
a storm in your brain.
Lighting cracks,
scream and shout.
Breathe it out,

My plans, plans,
never really unfolding.

Mind chose to prevail.
Inhale, exhale.

My plans, plans,
never really unfolding.

Like when I fell in love,
with a boy who can’t be.
Cold feet, only getting colder.
Temperature dropping, dropping,
and you’re only getting older.
Time will keep passing,
now you can’t even hold her.
Your fingers still, limbs frozen over.

Your mind is dark,
I can’t find the match.
For the candles, candles,
and the spark won’t catch.

Happier alone,
that’s what he said.
Isolated from you
I feel six feet under,

Talkin about you,
like you’re already gone.
Mourn a man,
whom I’ve only fawned.

Oh how I wish
I could say good riddance,
let his death be a dawn,

To a new coming sun.
Breathe out his poison,
with a simple yawn.

Yet I still breathe in,
breathe in and hold on.

Hold onto the sorrow.
Hold onto the pain.
Hold onto the man that drives you insane.
Feel the tension,
a storm in your brain.
Lighting cracks,
scream and shout.
Breathe it out,

Oh how I wish
I wasn’t so drawn
to deep brown eyes,
his siren songs.

Waters so alluring,
eye of the storm,
can you see me?
Do you watch me perform?

Make a fool of myself,
in my pretty white dress.
No longer so warm.

Are you hiding?
I’m pleading, please.
I need some confiding,
and I know you can see.
Please tell me…

Will I ever be free?
Oct 2023 · 78
birdy Oct 2023
filled with futile passion.

tears meant to be rationed
pooling at my knees,
spilling so fast
its hard to see.

a sea of futile passion,
beautiful but,
worth nothing
when its time to cash-in.
May 2023 · 149
not poetry just words
birdy May 2023
Never felt quite like this,
like i’m just existing
existing sweeps me away like a tide
my mind moves slowly down it like a delicate wooden raft
only to accelerate until it crashes
and I have to reset each time
each time losing a plank
until i’m quite literally on my last straw
well… semi-literally
and it *****
because I don’t even know why
why im putting myself through the journey
birdy May 2023
I’m sick of trying to make my thoughts beautiful

I’m too tired to think in verses

Poetry is like a whole other language

Sometimes I feel like I’m pretending to be bilingual

I’m not an artist

Like the rest of you
Feb 2023 · 277
balcony to the soul
birdy Feb 2023
if eyes are the window to the heart
why do i like to see yours closed
at rest

perhaps the anticipation of opening
the shutters

proves more beautiful
than the view
birdy Feb 2023
definitive death
deafening dark
a break never to be unbroken

now how must i find

the heart of a feeling

the throat of an emotion

the end to a thought

how can i know the last page of a story
when page numbers lose meaning
my poetry frivolous like—-
crayon scribbles in a colouring book
Feb 2023 · 140
Journal Entry 6
birdy Feb 2023
A crossroads.

a path encased in forest
green patchwork of branches, keep secret—-
the memories of shoes on the mossy trail

a path paved pretentiously
wood rebelliously pushing back against the green
overthrowing the chaos of jagged weeds
all the same suppressing the beauty of the wild flowers

a cleared path
barren of trouble
barren of life

a secluded path
enveloped in mystery
enveloped in regret

a guaranteed destination

an invitation to...
Jan 2023 · 569
objective: beauty
birdy Jan 2023
i’m addicted to beauty
i no longer want my poetry
to remind me
of the ominous goal
that you can never understand
Jan 2023 · 239
need to create
birdy Jan 2023
my heart urges to
but my mind
cannot focus on passion
can’t put aside pain
so my heart’s paintings
become plain
overwritten by
an unloving mind
Jan 2023 · 116
birdy Jan 2023
i feel like the carpet
frankly ugly
Jan 2023 · 116
“how are you”
birdy Jan 2023
scarce serendipity

scathing scars

sorrow’s souvenirs

serenity secluded



Sep 2022 · 1.4k
birdy Sep 2022
Make a wish
What if I don't want to blow out these candles
I never want to leave this moment
And I know that once these flames turn to smoke my life will change
Because this means I’ve survived
past the age
I treated like a deadline
Sep 2022 · 656
Childhood Gone Sour
birdy Sep 2022
the birth mark on your left shoulder
reminds me of how some things stay when we’re older

looking back tears wouldn’t have helped
wounds bound up by doubt
Aug 2022 · 155
birdy Aug 2022
love without laments
land without lord
Aug 2022 · 239
Human Fractions
birdy Aug 2022
your imperfection perfects me
Aug 2022 · 147
Realizing potential
birdy Aug 2022
crack    pop    sizzle
a million nerves go
crack    pop   sizzle
with vibrant rays of potential
to paint an exuberant future
Aug 2022 · 474
Camp Food
birdy Aug 2022
mushy makeshift macaroni
fiery flames, fueled
by barky bushy brews
of kindling
Aug 2022 · 388
Words to Wonder
birdy Aug 2022
I feel like white wooden window sills
Aug 2022 · 448
Unwanted Poster
birdy Aug 2022
Around every poorly lit street
the ones with cracks in the road
and coin beggars in the shadows
you will find my unwanted poster
a picture with clarity through time
from child to adolescent
the poster remains scattered
throughout this ****** city
a poem about feeling unwanted your whole life
Aug 2022 · 248
I love the way I love
birdy Aug 2022
my love is captivating
my love has gravity

I love like the ocean
I love with fervor

my love is waves of emotion
my love clashes into consuming chaos

I love the chaos
I love the way I love
Aug 2022 · 131
black picket fence
birdy Aug 2022
the shadow
of a 'perfect life'
Aug 2022 · 305
birdy Aug 2022
He existed like a song
his very being was music

I love his sweet soothing scent
Like wood slightly tinged

His crystal blue eyes
outshine the sky
and gain favour of the sun
Jul 2022 · 1.6k
20 pounds prettier
birdy Jul 2022
Each pound gained
my stake in 'pretty' waned
in societies tiny frame
of what's pretty
and what is shamed.
Sometimes I convince myself my worth is based on the scale, but if I lost twenty pounds that would not make me twenty pounds 'prettier', and appearance does not define you.
Jul 2022 · 142
Mind Hotel VACANCY
birdy Jul 2022
emotions check in and out
each leaving their mark

rooms left pristine by joy
will be left muddled by anger

But one room has never been stayed in
left untouched, the room for love is abandoned

I encourage passersby to stay
but alas it is left dusty

maybe the decor is too drab
or the building lacks a certain warmth

either way
the mind hotel is left with a permanent vacancy
Jul 2022 · 961
Male Gaze
birdy Jul 2022
I could never love myself through the male gaze,
every part of me dissected into something that is nothing
objectified and dismembered into significantly insignificant categories
criticized, and ostracized from humanly functions
only to be put on display
as a mannequin.
Jun 2022 · 1.4k
My Stranger - Letter
birdy Jun 2022
Dear stranger,

when I was crying on a park bench in the rain, why did you offer out an umbrella? Every other stranger had rushed away as if tears were contagious, but you welcomed mine. Why did you go a step further to ask what's wrong? When not even those I know care to ask. We sat there in the rain until my words stopped and the clouds cleared. Why did you reach for my hand when I left? Are you too in need of a listening ear? I have known you for hours yet I feel with you I am safe, you have a stability about you, like a strong shape. Yet a roundness as well, a softness. If I believed in instant love, you would be mine.

With love,
the person crying on the park bench,
Jun 2022 · 2.1k
birdy Jun 2022
Mellifluous red noises
flow out from a violin like arm
with a bow of steel
and a song of death
Jun 2022 · 519
creepy guy
birdy Jun 2022
He grabbed my thigh
I removed his hand --- I had to try
he just made his grip fortified
what did I expect --- he's a bad guy
but now my interest is bone-dry
I'm leaving him behind, along with his lies
always visiting with black eyes
always something gone awry
I'm sick of having to pry
you continued to pretend to clarify
your dumb alibis
Jun 2022 · 126
the new alone
birdy Jun 2022
i feel most alone in a room full of people
each with a life that i will never touch
each with a story i will never understand
Jun 2022 · 221
Last time i felt wanted
birdy Jun 2022
the last time i felt wanted
i was eight
this feeling is haunted
having died many years ago
Jun 2022 · 735
a tear
birdy Jun 2022
her iris leaked its blue
out the socket
and onto the concrete

dandelions round them
but not one
could wish away
the girls tear
Jun 2022 · 2.8k
Girl Met Boy
birdy Jun 2022
She longed for his lips
instead the only thing she kissed
was her seventh cigarette
Jun 2022 · 101
Beg - You Killed Her
birdy Jun 2022
Cry out her name
speak to her soul
scream for forgiveness
only the strongest cries
can surpass this barrier
between us and the soil
of the graveyard
Jun 2022 · 918
birdy Jun 2022
my sister was like a music box,
gentle and pristine
I made her rugged
her walk and her talks

I opened my skin
exposing my mind
and I fear her gears cannot be rewind

her perfect clockwork now intertwined
with coils of my past

I have failed as eldest
it should not be her burden
to carry trauma I've amassed
Jun 2022 · 492
You and Me
birdy Jun 2022
we are waves clashing,
to a pinnacle
from which we either fall into each other,
veer away.

and we both know,
what I want.
Jun 2022 · 1.7k
She Cost Me Thousands
birdy Jun 2022
Therapist after therapist,
but their bought out kindness
can't wash away the taste of death
that I've grown fond of.
Jun 2022 · 1.1k
I was wrong
birdy Jun 2022
They ran,
like they had never escaped
from anything before

I was their prison
and it hurts to know
that I was what
kept them up at night

Jun 2022 · 1.9k
Letter from the Past
birdy Jun 2022
To Yemaya,

Am I enough?
I've given you everything
I've hollowed myself out I have nothing left to give
my new shell is delicate and fragile
yet you do not handle it with care
Do you not have love for me at all?

From Yemaya,
February 2021
Jun 2022 · 3.6k
Devil is a 'knockin
birdy Jun 2022
The devil is knockin'
cracking up whilst you're talking
all your words are gettin' slurred
too bad your pleas of mercy shall not be heard

You'll pay for all the hurt
you'll sink down in the dirt

"Curse you devil!"

down with you
down to the herd
of all the other evils hell bears
Jun 2022 · 1.6k
Lovers in the Rain
birdy Jun 2022
two lovers in the rain
see each other
through a thousand new shades
each rain drop reflecting and refracting their love
into new beautiful hues
and shapes.
Jun 2022 · 1.3k
I feel crazy
birdy Jun 2022
the way they loom over
watching from cracks in doors
listening from windows ajar

they fear me

trying to discover secrets
about the enemy that resides within
this humble frame

for only I can be my saviour
but only I,
am proposed a foe
Jun 2022 · 295
birdy Jun 2022
I feel freedom from my skin
vicariously through the blood
Jun 2022 · 1.2k
Mark of Death
birdy Jun 2022
you looked at me
as if I wore a ravens coat
Jun 2022 · 1.3k
down the alley
birdy Jun 2022
men down the alley
don't care for the person
that they hunt
they care for
the prey like manner
of the scared
May 2022 · 1.7k
Battle of Dawn
birdy May 2022
The cry of morning
Rays of red sun
Marking the death of the moon
May 2022 · 2.8k
water bug
birdy May 2022
the whole valley
blended into a sea of black
stark to the starry blue sky
the mountains are the waves
I am only a water bug
May 2022 · 411
birdy May 2022
"Let's rain gaze..."
the books and the movies
talk about boys like this
May 2022 · 2.3k
Ethereal Woman
birdy May 2022
blue bells for eyes
her name was a song
that made the graveyard hum
for the dead became flushed
her beauty reminding them of life
May 2022 · 229
Water butter
birdy May 2022
The river churned the boy and his boat
into a fine butter
May 2022 · 963
birdy May 2022
her love was everything I knew
until the world recognized her worth
and she was ripped away from me
I don't wish for her
I wish to be worthy of her
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