Excitement stirs like a busy hive,
My mind swoons as the minutes pass by,
A climactic raise in serotonin, as we lock eyes.
Heartbeats flutter as we exchange hi’s.
My stomach feels as if it filled with a field of newly transformed butterflies.
All the hope I have left in this life hopes... that this moment, never goes bye.

Nostalgia in spring time brings much gloom, but not as much as this pressure in my chest and the sense of impending doom. A walk around an empty house, without your energy to fill a single room. A melancholy veil, one I wish lifts soon.

As the breeze serenades all the people the lovers swoon, the warm air caresses my skin, the scent of spring life in the wind, as the air carries the sounds of a happy tune, on a beautiful weekend afternoon.

My memory is flooded with sounds of you, the feel of you, the scent of you, the hope of you returning soon, so that the presence of you can once again fill my room.

Inside of my space, another dimension.
Time is nothing but an invention.
A way to make the day, tick away.
A way to justify all the words I say. Relative to me as well as to you.
Relative to the feel of what life has shown me to do. There’s an unnerving, sinking feeling.
That it’s passing, slipping, seeking and stealing.
A void in which should be filled with creative, imaginative grey matter.
Has fallen dark with thoughts and only they matter.
Thoughts of how relative time may be, but I can’t help but to feel that it’s constantly escaping me.

In a world full of colors, I notice the selfish grays.
Stealing vibrancy from all the other colors.
Their spectral rays.
grey takes over and has a monotone for every shade.
Every other color fights back with their array of shades.
But no one color can out do grey.
Not black nor white has power, as the gray has a place at the end of every tone.
No true individual vibrant color can own its own.
Grey steals and owns but still is all alone.

I write so that my words will stay.
Even as the memory of me passes away.
In the event I’m no longer physical, my sprit will remain.
So that my professed love for you doesn’t die in vein.
So, in no way can there be a false claim. my undying love for you will always remain.

At the end of my days I just fade away, after putting on my face, and staring in my personal play.
I just fade away.
The sky fades with me, to bluish gray and I look to it and say, this again has been a hell of a day.
I long for the day when the fading just stays and I no longer contemplate another played through day.

If time is what we need, why doesn’t it pass fast enough.

To wash away the past, it doesn’t take us far enough.

In this life time there’s so much to bare, I could combust.

Is there even enough time?
For us to be us?

I fear that only time could tell, but there may not be enough.

What could time tell me, except there’s a possibility of us or no us?

In due time I tell me, but it proves not enough.

Maybe it would be best, if I simply self distruct.

So, this is what I get.
I think sitting all alone.
All those times I took advantage, I should have known.
Now every sound echos off the walls, in these empty halls.
In now a house, that used to be a home.
Once filled with family, now is only occupied by me... alone.

I let my fingers take a stroll along her back, as I can not walk in her shoes.

I listen intently to her flow of words as to pay my dues.

My fingers end at her waist grasping her and turning her face to face.

I calm her with simple words,
“you’re safe, we are in the same place.”

Though it jiggles when we walk, alerting our imaginary enemies to our location.

Is it not valuable through the same indications, as a full dollar.

Yet broken and singular, when exchanged for goods does is it not accepted?

Why, when we break our dollars is everything regretted.

We can put it back together, but it should be just accepted. As is, broken as it exists.

Festering are the open wounds, the ones that we try to suture and groom. The ones for which we have no room. Though can’t seem to find a way to heal, the ones we don’t see yet surly feel.

It’s inherently evident, given the most evidence that love isn’t an inheritance, but something that is earned.

Not something that’s studied and learned.

but something struggled for like a tunnel built by a worm.

Working it’s way through the surface and becoming deep.

Finding a way to make the tunnels meet, out lasting downpours and extreme lack of heat.

Love is evident, when two meant to be souls meet.

Eternal unrest, by her beauty I am blessed.

By her avoidance I am stressed, surly it’s apparent I am under duress.

I reach as far as my arms can stretch, it’s not far enough to grip the skirts of her dress. And pull her towards me, rendering her under my arrest.

I try to grasp her attention with words. the only words that grab her attention are verbs, as they say actions speak louder than words, than I’ll do what I’ll have to in other words.

By my plight she is blighted, my love I have slighted.
By words I have sighted she still burns for me.

I can’t earn her need.
Yet I yearn so deep.
To cross a woman, finishing hell hath no fury... there’s  no need.

It’s true in hindsight, to reverse these things is my blight.
Whilst challenge to overcome it all, is my fight.

Something that’s tangible should be easily manageable.
My heart is tangible, so I’ll give it to you.
I’ll give it to you and watch what you do, as my fingers turn cold and blue.
I’ll idle near by, please don’t you cry, if you give me yours you can idle too.

So tell me when
my precious hen, as I protect you from foxes attempting to enter your den.
When will you ever so sweet, bless me with an egg I can keep?
One to hatch, and to raise. One to scold and to praise?
So tell me, I whisper through my teeth, when will it be you that I can keep.

Is it dark?
I often thought.
To tie her to my bed.

Or is it sweet, to kiss her Deep as I strap down her legs.

Is it cruel to make her drool, as my hands clasp her neck.

Or is it fair, so say I dare because, she loves when I take her there.

Empty are the now shallow depths of once we thought deep.

Night is ever Lonely, as depression steadily creeps.

In our once lust filled sheets, blood begins to seep.

As long as my heart still beats, the blood will continue to leak.

She is my weakness,
symbolizing everything I need.

My life, my love,
thoughts of her makes me weak indeed.

Moving on an intrepid woman in all this space.

I stare out a window thinking of the past, so much time I waist.

Longing for the days I’d grab her by the waist, savoring her taste.

A time that’s moved on long ago, posthaste.

Not even the chill of the winter can frost your chilly heart.
The one I once melted with my fiery art.

The one you replaced with a frigid block.
A heart once thought to me I carried the key to unlock.

Resonant memories wither.
Memories you’ve frozen as your thoughts dither.

Ice in your veins as you carry on.
My body still warm as your cold body moves on.

No time to let my blood cool, or rigor mortis to set.
You’ve packed your bags.
now everything is set.

My love fell in love, with another
I thought she fell from above, how could she love any other
I love no one other
Could never find the strength to put one above her
Could never find the strength to stop thinking of her
Even now as she lays with her lover

like her I want to be, the one I love, the one who doesn’t need me. Where shall I find the one to set me free, as she has caged me I can not set myself free. As free as she is that’s what I long to be. Just like the one who cried she needed me.

I could consume for an eternity what long ago has consumed me. Love from which, I can not break free. One that’s left me empty, the shell of a a fossil. What is and was monumental, gargantuan, colossal. I consume as if a glutton for pain and misery. Is life so much more fulfilling, for you? Without me?

Ever so fleeting the love of my life, hide behind a smile the pain of my life. Hidden in a smile my own demise. Ever do I think I am sure wise. She doesn’t bite, it’s me she fights, maybe her heart too. I can’t never know what is true.

I had my chance, at a second glance, it seems I’ve wasted it. A love so great I’m in disbelief I’ve tasted it. She sought relief because I desecrated it. Not giving a second chance for me to replace it.

New love new drug, it replaces what was. Out with the old, in with the new, I wish I could replace those I love as easily as you do. Fresh is her face, morning dew. Her thoughts of me are so askew. She says I love you, but simply can’t be, with you.

Time in comparison, how can you compare a life thick with time to an experience so thin. An experience through which I’ve grown thicker skin. Though to no avail with her I can’t begin again.

Walking ever so long, I long to be with her everlong. She says it has been too long. I’ve had her, for way to long. Every song seems to be about her, every lovely word, written about her. How can I ever forget about her. She traps me with her hidden power.

It’s a tough loss one that exhausts,
My broken heart spouting black smoke like an exhaust. my heart I had toughened is the same heart she made soft. weak for her only, how did she pull that off. More than just lonely I question my resolve. a turmoil so thick how could it be resolved? I shed my skin, more like she ripped it off. I’m left with no skin and a heart ever soft. My back bone grows brittle I fear it will dissolve. Spewing emotions my soft bleeding heart, I must turn it off.

She said she wanted me since the first moment she laid eyes on me

She knew she wanted to be mine the first time I spoke to her

Time unfolded and I knew I had to get close to her

Time never sleeps, even though lovers were in love one did creep

She knew from the first time she laid eyes on it she wanted to leave me

Her heart left me the first time I spoke of it

She runs from me ever fleeting, leaving my heart ever sinking.

Time never stops is what I keep thinking.

The mark has been set and ready they are to go no finish in mind the future isn’t theirs to know buried deep beneath the winters snow the earth endured with months to go until warmth allowed it to flourish and grow

Nothing but the air as the sound of a tear from a book once thick, thins in despair pages torn out then filled back in what once was thin is now thick again the sun sets and arises bringing much surprises new chapter new day they think as they lay once together now apart even though not ready set was the mark

A tease amongst the trees as the wind blows the green leaves they turn brown as to appease to the ground blending in then fading with a sound of rustling the tree never showing signs of much struggling the breeze bringing harsh things to bare but to the tree it seems nothing but air

Never asking why
Pondering our choices
Gazing into the nights sky
Planes fly by and I never gain a truth
Simply fallacies of our youth
Behaviors uncouth
Met with harshness of our realities
A beautiful life now is just a mere tease

Our loveless doom
Surprised am I by the demise
My eyes wide as I cry
On you once I shalt only rely
A smile upon your face ever so wry
I need not to ask so much as to why

Ever so fleeting the love of my life, hide behind a smile the pain of my life. Hidden in a smile my own demise. Ever do I think I am sure wise. She doesn’t bite, it’s me she fights, maybe her heart too. I can’t never know what is true.

The air in the room asphyxiates us two,
Intoxicated am I, me by you,
Light floods the room,
only by the moon,
As we met,
our lovers doom.

The greatest love I’ve ever known, a warm glow like from a hearth it’s where I find my home. It’s greater than the love I’ve held for anyone I’ve ever known, or anything I’ve ever owned. No creeping nostalgia can compare to that fire that roams. Ever so fiercely, looking to meet your oxygen, to ignite, and be as ones creation once again.

Her tattoos turn me on,
Her body refreshing like the dawn,
To her intimacy I am drawn,
Engulfed in her love I am her pawn,
Touching her as she likes her body sings a song,
My time is for her I will spend it long,
Her skin softer than fur
I am what she has on,
Meeting at the summit,
In her feminine embrace I submit.