Lexi: Favorites

Oct 2017 Lexi

Solus

I'm sorry Mom, for the times I complained,
And for all the unnecessary tears,
I'm sorry Mom, for all the times I yelled,
And for all those wasted years.
I'm sorry Mom, for my stubborn behavior,
And for the times I ran away,
From all of the problems, I didn't feel like facing
Forgive me, Mom, for I was lead astray.
I'm sorry Mom, please show me the door,
I think it's time I leave.
I need to find my own way of life,
and stop destroying yours.

#sorry #mom #forgive #me #love #you

Oct 2017 Lexi

hurt

Oct 2017 Lexi

Mel

hurt

it hurts so much
                knowing that
i care, but you don't.

it hurts so much
                knowing that
i'm not important to you.

it hurts so much
                knowing that
you only find me, when she is not there.

so much... till i  need to cry myself to sleep
     so much... i thought my heart is going to burst
it hurts so much... it really does.

Oct 2017 Lexi

Love notes

Oct 2017 Lexi

Vela

Love notes

You left love notes
Written along my ribcage
You said the spaces
Made perfect lines for poetry
My skin still remembers
Even after I washed you off

#exes #love #ribcage

Oct 2017 Lexi

2AM

Oct 2017 Lexi

Tyrus

2AM

Because its 2am

                                                and im sitting in my bedroom alone

    thinking of ways to **** myself
                  thinking of reasons to hate myself

                                                                  while you're sleeping

because I told you I was fine.

Thoughts- Which is better? To get help for your thoughts for the worry of another? Or let them think you're fine and let them sleep peacefully for once?

#love #sacrifice

Oct 2017 Lexi

Winter is cold?

Oct 2017 Lexi

NTR

Winter is cold?

The winter this year will be the coldest one by far
I can see it in the coldness of my heart
Got bills to pay but my car wouldn't start
Had to heat my house with gas siphoned from my neighbours car

The winter this year will be the coldest one by far
I can feel its cold in my bones
the way they creak like old folks' homes
some days it feels like I'm trying to move through coal tar

The winter this year will be the coldest one by far
I can see the cold in my old friends' gazes
Whispers behind my back, the usual phrases
"Still playing guitar?"
"Still want to be a star?"
"Doubt you'll ever go far."

The winter this year will be the coldest one by far
I feel the cold coming out of my veins
my nerves so frozen I can't feel the pain
I only numbly hope that it doesn't leave a scar

The winter this year was the coldest by far
I was starting to think it might be my last
But somehow before i knew it winter had passed
Looking back I wonder if it was really so hard

Winter ended in August. Wrote a SAD poem for it.
Whater is cold?

#depression #recovery #rhyme

Oct 2017 Lexi

I am

Oct 2017 Lexi

Dazed Dreaming

I am

Who am I?

I am...

Sensitive..
A day dreamer.
A believer in romance.
A lover.
A fighter.
A risk taker.

I am...

Empathic.
I feel people's pain.
It is a gift and a curse all the same.
I see light and darkness in people.
Love will forever be my weakness.

I am...

A woman with curves.
My eyes are a forest green.
My hair is curly, bouncy, and never stays in place.

I am...

Shy.
Sarcastic.
Stubborn.
Loyal.
Devoted.

I love.

Pizza.
Puppies.
Scary movies.
Watching the sun set over snow covered mountains.
The sound and smell of rainfall.

Yes I am me..
As simple as can be.
I cant pretend to be something else.
I'm simply Chelsey.
So please..
Take me for me..
Day dreamer,
A
Lover
And
A fighter...
But nothing...
More.

I am me.

Just Because lol

#me #iam #self #reflection #aware #poem #expression

Oct 2017 Lexi

Pandora would be proud.

Oct 2017 Lexi

Matthew Vargas

Pandora would be proud.

Those who know me, have read the words I've written in black ink and can physically see me
Have told me
Though my writing is depressing
And my suicidal thoughts obsessing
Have mentioned that glimmer of hope that hides behind my demons screeching inside
I feel like Pandora at times
While darkness reigns the depths of my mind,
There's Hope
Trapped within.
I'm letting go of that hope.
There's nothing for me,
No future,
No dreams,
No possibilities,
Absolutely Nothing.
Because I'm nothing and the only thing that will fulfill me is the fact that one day I'll stop breathing.

Sad and boujee

#tired #insecure #flawed #scarred #depressed #confused #pandoras #box #greek #mythology

Oct 2017 Lexi

Welcome to the friend zone

Oct 2017 Lexi

Anna Mic

Welcome to the friend zone

Welcome to the endless whole that is called my friend zone.
Once you’re in there you will never come out
Everyone always teases me about “the pit”
Watch out don’t flirt with Anna
Not that anyone would care but I have a reason.
Maybe just maybe I have been hurt to many times
That when a boy flirts with me after a week or two he gets tired of me and moves onto the next girl
Maybe after a year of wanting a guy talking to him every day he still picks someone else.
So, when finally, I am able to look in the mirror and not be degusted by what I see he just tramples on it.
It’s like he was in the mirror pointing out all my insecurities.
So once again I am back to the sad girl I was before
That after months of trying to get over something that he didn’t even know he did he notices me.
Wants to talk to me and flirt with me.
Smile at me when he sees me.
Fighting a raging battle inside of myself to not let him in
Reminding myself that my life is not a book and it will not work out.
Once they see the ugly mess inside they will run the other way so fast they will get whip lash.
So, welcome to the friend zone
Enjoy your stay.

#frienzone #boy #girl #friend #hurt #insecure

Oct 2017 Lexi

Love is?

Oct 2017 Lexi

Maxi

Love is?

Love…
What is it,
Is it pain ?,
Or is it beauty...
L- Lots of love given,
O- Overly obsessed with your significant other,
V- Very much in love with them,
E- Extremely committed to your lover and never give up on them, never abandon them, never stop loving them,
Love is the way you cherish someone,
Love is beauty,
Love should never cause you pain,
Love is a rhythm,
Love beats a tempo,
Love beats slower, slower, till it dumbs down,
Loves dumbs down
It… fades away,
Like skys full of stars,
When the fireball rises,
All the shining souls disappear into…
The black oblivion, their parents shoved them into this hell
All we see is the shining, but deep down Love is broke,
Like the child with the divorced parents.

#love