Since I was eleven
I've found my self now and again
In a front yard
Yours
Mine
Doesn't matter.
I look left and right
The street seemingly endless in either
direction
If I just started walking
I'd end up somewhere
Somewhere else
I turn around
and walk back inside.

­­­­Meant for more from birth
Carried in satin like a god
I do not envy you
When I succeed it is a surprise
Something met with pride
Due to lack of expectation
The Underdog Advantage
When you succeed it is anticipated
Should have been more
Greater in size and worth
Living up to your destiny
I do not envy your
Royal Disadvantage
In this great race
The start line may begin
With varied handicaps
But the finish line is in turn
Equal distance
I do not believe in Royal Design
We are all nothing to begin with
Nothing simply looks different depending on
Where you're standing.

I used to know you
love you
With distance you wavered
and I did with you
Still so much in common
Yet so dissimilar
Pain like grief
When someone you love dies
You died
And I missed your
Pretentious funeral
And I feel sorry
Perhaps I could have saved you
from what you've become
Now I only feel sorry
for seeing you move away
Too far gone
My couch has never been so
Empty
My heart never so
Heavy
Farewell my friend
wherever
You have gone.
You've gone.

I'm lost in the city
But I'm taking my time
The streets keep talking to me
They're asking how everyone can spend so much time looking down and straight ahead
When a whole world grows rapidly above them

Buildings grow into the stars
A new styled solar system
They dance among the clouds
Wisping fluffs of greys and whites
When I look, I know that I want to be where it all connects

I am gliding down hills
I am fumbling through crosswalks
I am slipping past street signs
because I can't keep my feet on the ground and my head from that new world

My heart is a cold stigma
It is the epitome of the frozen winter.
Dark
Desolate
Absolute zero

Your heart however
Is the illustration of the warm summer
Bright
Exciting
Beckoning

Now there's not just distance between us,
But seasons as well.

I met this girl who means a lot to me.
This is dedicated to her.
Love.

Please forgive me for letting you get too close
Although I did warn you
There is no outlet down this road
and there are no life vests on this boat
and there are no airbags in the car
and there is no harness or safety net for when I am falling back into my own body...
Have you ever tried to breathe underwater knowing you've run out of oxygen and the light is so far away yet you keep swimming towards it but it seems like the more you swim the further you get from it and just as you're fingertips graze surface the ocean claims your name so the voice of your lost soul forever screams in the shells that are a home to a series of hermit *****
Have you ever sunk into your own bed by what feels like the force of a thousand boulders, unable to move, unable to speak, and just when you think it's all over, the demons that haunt you come out and now you're unable to breathe, there you go hovering over your body and not being able to do a thing
Every night I pray to God that I never see you in my dreams
because for your entire life, everyday that you wake up from your dream you lose a little bit more of yourself to those demons that haunt you
Every time you close your eyelids you see the monster that's trying to be Neptune and drown you in his seas
But baby I gave you the moon as the light to see the path that leaves behind all of those hermit shells
Now your the voice of your lost soul is no longer trapped in the home of a monster
It has found its way to me
Finally you can get some decent sleep
and wake up to me
from this day forward I can't say that you're the woman of my dreams because I'll be ****** if my demons trap you too
When someone asks you how we came to be, you tell them that we met on the moon every night
To calm the ocean tide and make it out alive
and if you are to drown in your dreams again, I'll still be here on the moon for when you find my light again
Waiting to build you a new home away from all of our demons...

They say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder
But sometimes I ask myself, how can this be?
Cause when I look with my eyes, I only start to feel resent
and I begin to despise, the things I realize like
how my women of color have been simplified, and hypserxualized
how the black woman's body has been used and abused and now
It personifies, sexuality and promiscuity, out of all the things media feeds us these are some of the worst lies
You see cause black women are queens, and when white culture saw their worth, they were rattled
They couldn't help but try to minimize and de-legitimize, and put a guise over the eyes of all that viewed her
She is not just a big ***, big lips or hips
She is the mother of humanity, in her essence from her hair, to lips to her fingertips she is a Queen, and she is to be respected.
And I will die for her honor, We will not go back into slavery days, I will not stand here while she gets up on stage naked and her body is dissected, and her soul, her essence neglected, her heart, her mind infected.
From these queens come the workers, the Kings, without the black woman we have no past and we have no future
We must protect the black woman, for she is sacred like scripture.

I miss last summer
And mattresses on the floor
And empty liquor bottles
And coming back for more.

I miss the beginning
How strange it might have seemed
That the adventures I now look back on
Now sit on my mind like fuzzy dreams.

Your car was way too hot for me
Most rides were windows down
Can’t forget falling asleep in your passenger seat
Whenever you drove around.

Each day was nothing different
Laying on that trampoline became routine
But that’s what I loved the most
Like in a movie, we played the scenes.

I miss last summer
And a room without a door
And a front porch covered in people
With the one that I adored.

I stood in the February snow
the freezing sleet
no boots
no coat
Steam wafting off my fury

My father read the lie
two hundred yards away
and walking toward me

So I owned it
told it
With a snarl
Without a flinch
Both knowing

I held my ground before him
and wore the red of his hand
on my face for a week