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Meg B Nov 2014
My body quivers,
the tips of my fingers
pulsating wildly,
beads of sweat collecting
on my furrowed brow,
teeth sinking into
my bottom lip,
breathing in sharp
heaves of breath,
echoing the fast-paced
pulse of my enthusiastically
beating heart,
limbs tingling,
lower extremities losing feeling
as my body becomes absorbed
in the ecstasy
to which it succumbs
as, in one last swift, graceful movement
you make me explode,
my mind orgasming in the
crazy sensation we have
created in the simple
exchange of our
encapsulating dialogue,
reawakening my addiction,
my yearning,
my craving
for another round
of conversation,
rapture unlike
any other I've felt,
in tangibly feeling nothing but your soul
and your words.
Janette Nov 2012
Slide into the path of our journey
Follow the map along my spine
With breathless lips.......

                  




Night's dark flowers swell
Silver bells,
Among my heart's wet pulsing,
Thoughts wild, utter me Autumn
Like a feather of Vespers;
An owl sings
A dark reveille in moonlit guise
And shadow traced
Lulling chants
Marry me to yesterday...




Midnight,
Combs a phantom of hands
The memory of you
Shaking the blue sky from my hair,
Coaxing that purring at the back of my throat,
My song, held hostage
Amid the still of the night,
I feel you now, as words flow
From the flesh of your tongue
A…murmured heartbeat...



Tangles me tender, beneath breath
Softening sadness inside
A pandemonium of bruised echoes,
Calling…
My voice
Naked as moon,
Intoxicating scents of desire,
Fierce, cathartic, ripe, unraveled
Inside you...



Feel me now...
Through the fleece of memory,
Pulsating passion through our veins
Feel me now...
My breath on your cheek
Lips brushing over your skin
Feel me now...
My tongue dividing your mouth
Kissing you harder and deeper
Released now
Intoxicating scents of desire,
Orgasming into serenity..............
ghost queen Oct 2020
Night was falling, a full bright silver moon was rising, and Seraphine’s hunger had become unbearable. She needed to feed, had to have young fresh female blood, to stay alive and young.

Science had caught up with the reason vampires needed to feed on the youngest, preferably baby’s blood. In 1866 a Frenchman named Paul Bert had conjoined rat’s circulatory systems in a process called parabiosis, and thus the Prize of Experimental Physiology from the French Academy of Science.

In 2012, Cambridge University’s Julia Ruckh found old mice cojoined to young mice physically and mentally rejuvenated, becoming younger, smarter, and more energetic. Subsequent research discovered proteins in the plasma caused the rejuvenation. News outlets had proclaimed, “fountain of youth discovered in ordinary plasma.”

Seraphine needed the youngest, which has the highest concentration of rejuvenation proteins and hormones;  the purest, which is virus-free, and female, which has the highest levels of estrogen and progesterone.

Ideally, a baby girl’s blood would be best, but in today’s modern society, killed babies drew attention. The next best and the pragmatic thing was a 15-year-old runaway girl. L’ Association Assistance et Recherche de Personnes Disparues (ARPD), estimates 1000s of Parisienne girls, ages 10 to 18, runaway each year due to ****** and or physical abuse, ending up on the street, and having survival *** in 48 hours or less for food and or protection. And few if anybody cared. They disappeared, never to be found, presumed dead from a ****** overdose, or stabbed in a fight for food, money, or drugs.

Since runaways had high levels of disease due to survival ***, ****, and ****** addiction, Seraphine focused her attention on young troubled Arab girls living in the Habitation à Loyer Modéré (HLM) or projects of the 93rd, the department number of Seine-Saint-Denis, the poorest, predominantly Maghreb Islamic Arab banlieues of Paris.

Seraphine would undo her ponytail, letting her raven black hair cascade down around her shoulders, so she could fly around and into the projects at night landing on rooftops, listening for arguments, yelling, or shouting of eahira (*****), waqha (****), or haram (forbidden). When she heard those words, she knew a father was forcing old-world customs and religion on his born and raised in France daughter. The daughter, going to secular French public school, knew neither Arabic nor Islam, rebelled, wanting to live a secular, feminist rather than a submissive religious life.

Seraphine had found this month’s mark. She focused her superhuman hearing and sight on a tenth-floor open balcony window of the building across the street.

She could see an older man dressed in the traditional white dishdasha tunic, and taqiyah skull cap worn to evening prayers, yelling and throwing his hands in the air. Further in the flat, Seraphine could see a girl, crying. The man yelled waqha, waqha, then slapped her, and she fell to the floor. An old woman pulled the man back, as the girl got up and ran out the door.

Seraphine knew how this would play out and where the girl was headed. Four blocks away was the Lycée Général et Technologique, which housed a 24-hour crisis center for teens facing physical and or ****** abuse, pregnancy, homosexuality, ****** addiction, or homelessness.

As foreseen, the girl burst out the front doors of the HLM, running, crying down the street. Seraphine leaped from the 13-floor building into the air, silently following the girl like a bird of prey. The girl walked down Rue Bonnevide to Rue Guy Moquet, taking a shortcut through a wooded park.

Seraphine flew down to the ground, landing without a sound, and followed the girl from a distance. She could smell her youth, see her round hips and long shiny hair. When the girl had walked deep into the dark and silent park, Seraphine sprang forward like a puma, tackling the girl to the ground, and slitting her throat before she could scream.

Seraphine savored the ****, drinking the squirting blood from the carotid artery, relishing the warm fresh blood. The girl, in shock, blinked rapidly, trying to process what had just happened to her. She tried to speak but gurgled only blood, tears of fear started streaming down her cheeks. She knew she was dying, was afraid of dying, and wished her father was here to protect her, and make it all go away.

The blood slowed to a trickle. The girl had bled out and her body died. Seraphine continued to drink, ******* harder to get the remaining blood. The girl’s body convulsed then stilled as her brained slowly and finally died.

Seraphine had fed and would be satiated till another full moon.  She got up and licked her lips of residual blood. Her clothes were drenched in sweat and blood. She looked at the girl’s dead body, admiring her clear complexion, and big brown doe eyes, but felt no remorse for the ****.

She picked up the girl’s body in her arms, jumped into the night sky, and flew 65 kilometers northeast of Paris to La Foret De Compiegne in la department d’Oise, a secluded and rural part of northern France. Dead center in the forest lies Saint-Jean-aux-Bois, a small, and forgotten farming village of septuagenarian and octogenarian.

Seraphine flew to a farm a kilometer outside of the village. As she neared the farm, she could smell the putrid stench of pig ****. She started her descent, dropping the girl’s body, which hit the ground with a thud, in the barnyard, as she gently touched down.

The farm was dark, the only light was that of the full moon. She heard a rustling coming from the farmhouse. She saw an old man walking her way, holding a dim flamed oil lamp. He did not look at her, only at the ground, afraid of what would happen if he looked her in the eyes.

Seraphine grabbed the girl’s body by the hair and dragged it to the main pigpen, and threw the body over the fence and into the pit of sleeping pigs. The body hit a pig, startling it out of its sleep, squealing, waking up the other pigs, and realizing they had been fed fresh meat. The pigs sheared the flesh off the bones, then chewed and ground the bones. Within a couple of hours, there would be no trace of the young girl’s body. She was just another disappeared runaway.

Seraphine turned her attention back to the farmer, pulled out a brick of Euros from her coat, and threw it at his feet. He didn’t dare pick it up. He was too afraid of her. He knew what she was. And she knew, he knew what she was.

He’d seen the countless girl’s bodies come through like chicken carcasses at a processing plant over the decades. He knew he would die of old age soon, and only hoped God would forgive him for helping a monster.

Seraphine turned around, jumping into the sky, and disappeared. He was trembling and relieved that she was gone. He won’t see her for another full moon. He painfully bent over and picked up the brick of Euros. His hands were shaking.

******

Seraphine got out of the shower and wrapped her hair in a towel. She looked in the mirror and admired herself, the flawless white skin, the blood red lips, the pear shaped figure, but most of all her firm perky *******. She was brushing her teeth, when the doorbell rang. She rinsed out her mouth and wrapped a towel around her, walked to the door and opened it. It was Damien. She mischievously and alluringly smiled. He grinned back, knowing why she’d called. “I was so glad you were still up when I called,” she said poutingly.

She took his hand and led him to her bedroom. It was softly lit, a low yellowish light, not unlike that of a candle’s. The walls were decorated in red damask wallpaper with gold crown, base, and chair moulding. It was very elegant, very French. The bed was a large four posted red ruffled canopy, covered with a red duvet and pillows.

She got to the foot of the bed, turned around, unwrapped herself, sat on the bed, and shuffled herself to the headboard. She looked at him and spread her legs, showing, offering herself to him. Damien took off his clothes and crawled to her, over her, and leaned down to kiss her. She rose up to meet his kiss, wrapping her arm around his neck, then dragging him down in her.

She kissed him hard, ******* his tongue into her mouth, biting his lower lip. She stopped. He looked at her, a questioning look on his face. Then she pushed him down towards her *****. She had a trimmed and sculpted bush, just enough not to hide her full lips.

He started kissing around her bush, her tummy, and inner thighs. He could feel her squirming, as he circled around, edging closer to her *******. He kissed her lips, sliding his tongue up and down, then penetrating her.

She was wet, and tasted fresh, like sweet spring water. How amazing he thought to himself. I’ve never tasted a woman like this before. He went deeper with his tongue, pulling back the lips with his hands. She pushed his head hard into her. He licked her splayed ******, as she moaned in pleasure and approval. He moved his tongue up till he got to her ****, and lightly rubbed it then stopped, kissing her tummy. She relaxed and sighed.

He kissed his way down to her ****, kissing it softly then circling it with his tongue. She arched her back as he vigorously rubbed her **** with the tipe of his tongue. She moaned, then yelled stop, stop, in breathy gasps, then fell back into the pills. She took his head in her hands, and pulled him up to her mouth, and gave him deep, passionate baiser amoureux.

She took his hard **** in her hand and guided him towards her *****. She slid his **** up and down her *****, lubing up the head of the **** with her wetness. Then she let go, and he penetrated her slowly, as she gasped then moaned. He felt her wetness and heat as he slid deeper into her.

He started to pump rhythmically back and forth, slowlying picking up speed, as she moaned and groaned as he bottomed out his **** into her. He was going to *** and started to moan, when she yelled, “choke me, choke me.”

Taken back, he slowed. She looked up at him quizzically. “Choke me,” she said sternly. “You're a big boy. Choke me,” she repeated with a bit of irritation in her voice. He placed his hands around her neck and lightly pressed and started pumping. He got back into the rhythm and was back on track, getting close to *******. “Harder,” she said, “hard like you mean it.” It turned him on, and he clamped down harder as he pumped harder, animalistically.

He knew she was getting close to orgasming as she moaned and writhed under him. “Oui, oui, oui,” she screamed, and in a blink of an eye, she’d flip him on his back. Her hands on his chest, holding him down, as she rode him hard. She screamed, “ah, ah, ah,” then collapsed on his chest. His ****, still hard, inside her. She slowly rolled over, taking him with her, till he was on top, then rocked her hips, wanting him to continue, to finish.

He started to moan. She hooked her wrist around his neck and pulled him to her mouth, kissing him hard and deep as he came. He convulsed collapsing  on top of her. His **** still inside her, as she wrapped her arms around and rocked him back and forth, kissing the top of his head as if comforting a child.

He rolled over, crashing into the bed with exhausting and fatigue. He looked over at her. She was staring up at the ceiling. He saw the reddish purple strangulation marks he’d left on her neck, and slipped into a deep sleep.
Ndricim Ademaj May 2012
I know that once I have loved you,
on a date that I can't remember well...

it was cold that night
it could have been winter, anyhow
you were unwashed, nameless
without perfume and a beer
desanctifed a hundred times,
but I have loved you
more than all the saints of the world

yes, I've been waiting for you too long,
but you didn't stay long enough
anyhow we'd still do the usual
**** that little love from our sweaty skin
then we would say to each other
'Good night, you are better than her'

Once i have loved you
on a date I can't remember quite well...
more than all the saints of the world,
the impotents that never knew how to love the way we do
and what they did when you went crazy while orgasming?
gave you flowers, sorted out the words
for their sterile loves

and didn't want any of them then,
so you wanted me
a wild haired stud
a descantified sinner for you
one hundred times,

we knew,
love was just an ordinary *****
and we were like that
not sacred as that day had to be
so I don't remember it quite well
and you haven't forgotten it, I know...

©Ndriçim Ademaj
Pen Lux Aug 2010
Orgasming in the passenger seat,
while she listens to something she doesn't understand,
sitting across from someone she'll never love,
all the while completely clothed and turned off.

She's one of those girls,
who touches herself when you're on the the phone,
or just watching another episode of a mediocre television show.


Everyone's asleep while she sings the saddest songs
in the most **** of ways.
Except he's not asleep,
when they're ******* for days.
Kyle Kulseth May 2016
You keep shaking at the branches
just like money grows on trees.
I been dealing in these cheap clichés
just like they'll help me leave someday.
And--easy! Easy! Easy.--
We can't let 'em hear us scheming
at the bottom of their hill
while their victories are streaming.

I can still remember days
when sane folks always laid bets on us.
With our mortarboards tilted all smart
and God left sorting filters,
we tilted, tipped all windmills
and we smoked through all opponents.

You'll tell me I once loved you.
I'll reply that, once, I could.
And we'll keep on telling stories
'til our voices clear the woods
and drift on up their hill
and through their windows
to their ears.

I'll tell you you were beautiful.
You were! I ******* swear!
So tell me I was beautiful
and that we can repair
this broken clumsy story
that ****** us all up and brought us here.

Up there atop their hill,
those thieving ******* sip their wine,
while below them, our white facepaint runs.
We plan ahead for better times.

I keep shaking at the branches
as if friendship grows on trees.
Just as though they might accept me,
when the dollars fall with Autumn leaves.
And you been dealing hard in hollow hopes
and flimsy dreams.

But I still think you're beautiful.
So tell me that I'm beautiful.
And then let's clip their flimsy wings.

Those ******* 'crost the town
are eating **** and grinning.
               Cackling,
               orgasming,
while counting out their winnings.

But their music plays too loud
and soon their eardrums will be bleeding.
If they can't hear us breathing, babe,
they'll never hear us scheming.
I'm trying to do a LOT with a LITTLE as far as pacing and meter go, and I think, maybe, I get a little hung up or tripped in a couple places. All in all, though, I think it turned out pretty good. I kinda like it.
mike Dec 2012
noone has eyes left in this room. i mustve walked in through the wall. tiptoed around the piled-up death, im *****, and marched my smile right into the madness. ill **** any corpse clever enough to not be a corpse...but any corpse will do... with that glazed look from your face filled with dumbness, i wonder what it is youre imagining; to deduce, one must wonder: did ye hast eyes from the birthening??..... cold grey child, id have gone wild on your skin. but now, with fear etched in your brow, youre stretched too thin for it to be sin. with my hooves and my claws i applaud your rotting body torn and clawed. i tare your form from form. and from existence; the never born. enjoying the rhythm of clacking teeth to the tone of your lungs collapsing. im dancing and laughing. prancing and clapping like the little dead girl that im wearing, every stitch is miss-matching.. and yes, your being im crushing, and youre no audience, but still, im blushing; i look smashing. not much of a musician, but ill try to make nice sounds. tips and taps and hums and dee-dee-dee's. clicks and clacks from my tongue.HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! AAAAHHHHHHHH... its so FRIGHTENING!!!! ISNT IT?!! and you like it. it excites you.. it makes nice sounds. so much so your orgasming or convulsing. and your eyes would be rolling in the back of your head if you didnt have gaping holes there instead. that i **** and i fill as your soul escapes and spills out onto the floor; like a snake to its skin: you poor thing, youve shed. the puddle of you left mumbles some useless question with your definite last breath: why? - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! WHY??! ..for i am the cataract in satans left eye while i swiftly sew his right eye shut. to see nothing but the haze of souls to fry every time he decides to look up.... and thus you bubble some sputter and spew with your mouth gaping wide as my tongue laps your hyde. HHHHHH... i steal that last breath from you from inside of your chest as i give you your death. fear freedom you spawnless *****. as i drop a very large stone onto your chest cavity. i give you your death but in death, again and again... you look ravishing. i am the Maddening.
Onoma Mar 10
there's a sketchup--

of a unisex, Grey's Anatomy

figure.

utterly saturated with macro/micro

eights...re-orgasming~
lazarus Apr 2017
it's only a little bit like a toothache when your
eyes well over in that muted, melancholy way.

i had so sorely forgotten this place
the anxiety, fresh like a cresting wave
that languid boil in my throat
the therapist tells me that I have to take deep breaths and
hold myself where it burns, tenderly
but i always end up choking myself.

limp attempts to strangle the fervent clamor
my brain revolves a harrowing dialogue,
masquerading as novel thoughts

this afternoon i stood, back to the sweat-slicked masses
my own mess of rank and fear dripping from brow to navel
tears vaporizing mid-air before they could season the eggs

and i realized in the most painful way
that the pallid, grease-burned hands stroking my neck
in some strange semblance of comfort
might as well be his,



they should have cremated him.
i ache to hold reverence on the same ground in which he rots.



you were humming between my legs while i twitched and gasped and then i burst into tears. wracking sobs, really, the kind that make my chest hitch and your mouth kept hitting my ***** bone while i shook, orgasming and crying.

i want to say a lot of things about the why, how and of course and to be honest with you and i think

but my lips are too swollen with his death. his bloated corpse is hiding in my throat, slicing up my insides, and i'm so ******* allergic, can't you see in the ways my hands flail and my eyes bulge?

all the lengths of my skin are boiling,
your validation a soothing salve
for a moment, before dissipating in my wretched heat

can't you see that this all fell into place decades ago? from the very first time you had somewhere better to be, someone else who needed your time and space, i was already burning.
so small and slight, trembling just a little bit.

it was you you YOU

all of you, now dead and rotting or just as good as




i refuse to join you.
i hurt all over.
matilda shaye Jun 2019
her hair is longer than I realized
and it smells familiar
my stomach feels off as I
stare at the posters on the walls
because I’m not sure where to look
(she’s so naked as am I)
I decide the top of her head is fine
then I decide to let my heart
murmur which I've been
avoiding since they diagnosed me at 7
but I'm exhausted and orgasming
really takes so much out of me
I decide I’ll only do it three more times
then I decide just this once

I do it all again the next night
because I’m trying to live my life
that doesn’t fully explain my reasoning but it’s all I have to offer
there’s dozens and dozens of
different versions of her and I
want to put it into writing that I
only ever liked two of them
I’ve never before liked each and
every part of a person
I've also never even been
close to admitting that
so I think this is at least one
part progress poem

she’s playing with a kid and I know
it’s supposed to turn me on but it’s
just making me feel physically ill
I wear my bathing suit bottoms
as underwear
she texts me that she’s not
even ******* wearing any
I’ll sleep in her bed if I want
to only because
there’s not really a point to
sleeping in mine
it'd be nice if I wanted to,
but I don't
so I go home

she chain smoked her entire
pack of american spirits
lying completely naked on
her ***** nylon carpet
I realized about halfway in
that I didn't want to touch her
I turned to my left to a shrine
of Joan Jett and then
I choked on her **** piercing
for the very last time
she got upset and tried to
question what went wrong
for the first time in my life
I just shut the **** up
because blaming it on her
star sign felt too insensitive
DaeDazer Jan 2015
12/24/07

1:31 am


She sleeps like a female
orgasming
arms up over her head
fists gripping invisible string.

She snores like a feline
a pleasant purr
redundantly peaceful in rythm.

Stirring
she moves slowly
looking disgruntled
by a jostle from my side of the bed.

Open palms like jesus
relaxed and willing
to save my soul.

Beneathe the covers
her legs are a valley
a proud flock of geese in winter
and i am always their leader.

The cotton sheets
covering her steady soles
present two perfect triangles
like the smooth wooden building blocks of yesteryear
or mommy-tailored sandwich halfs.

Stirring again
she props her arms under her calm face
soft and sweet
pulsing and pure.

Her hair, the darkest moss
spry and lively
tangled in ribbons
like christmas bows
just waiting to be unwrapped...
Sinai Sep 2014
I was never built for orgasming
Because of men who love to give
I was built for
Steal another ******
Kind of ***
Out of pure selfishness and absolutely
Never
Out of generousity.

I was made for
Out of your head
Shut the **** up
Type of romantic insanity.

I used to think I was built to travel the world with somebody
But I found I was built
To get locked up and
Break free by myself.
James Jean Dec 2019
Last night we lay in bed, I asked her under a code of honesty
The request was a reach because opening up isn’t her policy
If you had the Flashes power and could go back in time
Would you marry me when we were dumb but in our prime

I could feel something going through her head
She paused for a long while then said
“In my heart of hearts I say yes” pause “But I don’t know if I would”
My insides were screaming but I held it in as hard as I could

Frankness is so rare and in no way want me to hamper
What could be said to not discourage the candor
She is willing to talk so out with the mystery
I asked, “what can I change so you don’t alter history?”

“it is *** and your obsession with me orgasming, you want it to much”
“And now the things you shared is on the gay side not just a touch”
I will admit I think about *** and my mind is filled to the brim
I asked, “if you found someone that doesn’t want much *** would you have married him?”
Both of us staring into the dark she said “Yes”
Insides are reeling but I keep it suppressed.

18 years ago by chance I ran across an email from her lover
I fought for her when she almost left me for that other
Winning in the end, I have never fought so hard
But would she fight for me I choose to disregard

All I could do was rejoice
But I was the easy choice
We were already married and if she stayed with him then it would have wrecked another
She didn’t want to be a home wrecker because the other was married to a new mother

She rolled over to face me. Said “I need to sleep now” Kissed me and said she loved me and was sleeping soundly within minutes
I lay with eyes wide open. The candor I asked for caused pain beyond my limits.

This morning when she waked all was usual
She walked around naked and was so beautiful
Though hurt I kissed her and smiled not wanting to be a ****
Got dressed for casual day, I never wear a hat at work

But when I saw the bed post and saw my new ball cap
What are the chances of this crap
Coincidences can be so caviler
Blazoned across the front was “Time Traveler”

I threw on the new cap but pulled it off when it didn’t fit
I stared at it remembering I never got to wear it
At the store she took and wore it the rest of the day
She is fantasizing about a time away
Defective Words
m Oct 2018
dynamics of heartbreak
your distance, his proximity,
the repetition of releasing
hormones and horrors,
and honey-colored eyes,
and hope.

i enter the car and
he looks at me. kisses me
before we walk in, opens
the door, brushes my leg
under the table, butterflies
warm and sooth and scare.

my heart breaks when
it's supposed to be solid,
when i'm supposed to be
happy and whole and ******
and orgasming and screaming
and strong

my heart breaks when i am kissed,
when i tell my sister i love her,
when my dreams come true;
the edges are sharp in my chest;
i don't think it will ever not hurt
i don't think i will ever not be broken
i've been trying to process some intense and confusing emotions and this is the result
Donall Dempsey Aug 2019
JOURNEY

( for Seamus Heaney )

I, the only guy
in our yoga class

we cut short
our meditation

decanting ourselves
from the Samuel Beckett Room No. 2

to a room up above
to see you...be you.

Why man, you doth bestride
the narrow world like a Colossus

and we petty people
walk under your legs

and peep about
we like a crowd of cows

staring at an open five-bar-gate
on a frosty morning

heat rising from us
perspiration stains under oxters

when
an ordinary looking man ambles in

taking his time

looking like a kind uncle
from a long ago summer holiday

and then
you open your mouth

words dancing about in our heads
delighting the senses

and all my female yoga class
moan and groan

"Oh...I so want to...f**k him!"

"Shhhhh..!" I shush 'em
"Listen...listen!!!"

I cut back the dogwood
to the bone

it throws its fecundity
about this August garden

as your death is
facebook'd thru

and I stop
to think of you

in the Samuel Beckett Room No. 2
and its orgasming females.

I see you
dig alongside me

dig down
through years of time

a passing nod to your da
peeling spuds with your ma

you laughing at me
telling you of the yoga-ites

"Ah, sure, they only
think they do!"

And in answer to a something
or other I had said:

"Everything takes time...even time
takes time!"

I grasp your hand
in mine

that shy smile
the sheer generosity of you

now you gone
on your last journey

I nod to you
you nod to me

and I cut back the dogwood
a little more.
I was only after becoming a bookseller and this was my first foray into the getting of books....some little press had the coup( Seamus was like God then )of publishing new poems in a little blue collection and the first poem was ALPHABETS. I fell in love with it and bought 20 signed copies. In the ensuing conversation I told him about the yoga class and he laughed at this sudden *** symbol he had to add to the icon status. I was full of admiration for the then new ALPAHBETS poem and he told me a poem's main ingredient was time...time for it to filter through....percolate...like rain through limestone. He was such...such a generous man and oh...that shy smile.
Over the years i gave away the books one by one to friends and now have only one last copy which I gave to Jan on meeting her. Fond memories.
thelonious Oct 2019
For many years now, I have watched the rain/I have scraped the ice off my skin/I have sat in a luxury sedan and dreamed about things, things that don’t exist now, things that never did exist, I have memories of dreams, I have memories of Brooklyn/it is two seventeen am, I have taken three hits of acid, i am sitting at pier 1, I’m drinking triple x vitamin water, it is snowing, the east river is on fire, a van arrives, fourteen Hasidic children get out/it’s  three thirty two am, I’m in Times Square, It’s forty two degrees, I’m wearing a t shirt, I’m running from the cops, the cops were never chasing me, I see Carson Daily/it’s five forty seven am, I’m on a rooftop in Bushwick, midtown has vanished behind pink fog and smeared neon, a woman is orgasming loudly, a **** is crowing, I stand swaying, on the precipice between infinite possibilities and nothingness/it’s three twenty nine am, I’m lying in the middle of Atlantic Avenue, I’m making snow angels/twenty three minutes from now a woman I met on ok Cupid dot com will be playing me tom waits records, I will think about another girl that I love, but who does not love me/forty eight minutes from now I will emphatically ******* onto a large pair of *******/I have walked many blocks and over drafted many debit cards/I have been watching the rain for a long time now
Janan Jul 2018
I just wanted to tell you that I forgive you
Wanted to tell you that
There’s no need to apologize

For i already have taken full responsibility for coddling your self destruction

I hold myself accountable for mind ******* your insecurities, orgasming myself into an illusion

and giving you the audacity to feel entitled to do me the way that you did me

This beautiful toxicity was at my disposal
For lying in bed with your agony replaced me having to face my own in the mirror

So, why don’t you accept this apology from me

I promise you I won’t throw palm trees at your presence

And I will smile every time you see me grace your walkway

Because you have given me motivation to be a better

Healthier woman for a man who doesn’t even know
That someone like me exists

I promise you now, I’m preserving my energy

You can no longer suffocate the peace in me

This is the end
Jonathan Moya Mar 2019
There is no sky or earth
in the white van that crosses me over,
nor in the drywall coop painted red
where white men with tattooed arms
stood up and sit down, up and down,
unleashed erections pivoting
and searching for the best angle
to penetrate my forever painful ***.

I am called “pollo”, chicken,
“nuevo carne”, new meat
by the coyote who drove me
and the gringos who maul me,
their millet dollars tossed into hands
waiting unsmiling at the ajar door,
passage paid with my legs,
eggs for pollos not eaten.

Across the hall I hear the cackling
of men orgasming into torn sheets,
a softer clucking than the maras gangs
of Tegucigalpa roosting the food market
and the barrios for ****** violators.
In Honduras anyone can ******
a woman and nothing will happen.  
At least, in Texas they bury you.

They promise half of half of half of profits,
less than 50 pesos, dollars on a $50 John.
They dress me in corpse rags that
stink of gasoline and last *******;
feed me grain, maize, rain barrel water.  
My nakedness kills fleeing for freedom.
Nobody will risk saving a puta, *****
from a charcoal window stash house.

I dreamed once I could wear silk dresses
or richly sew them together for a small,
life with a good man and brown-eye kids.
The Chinese girl smuggled in from Fuzhou
can aspire to own a nail salon, or work
a massage parlor run by Sister Ping’s heirs.
Biloxi runaways can traffic on NY dreams.
I have only violation and suicide.

I traveled the border crossing between
Tegucigalpa and the American Dream,
enough  to forget why I crossed over,
times enough until I wasn’t me anymore,
to pace back and forth, scratch at
and settle in the straw of forgetfulness,
American in I have a  heavy debt
that only heaven can release.
OnwardFlame Aug 2018
I think about a measuring cup
The different numbers that signify
What it is.

I see a photo of an infant on the internet
My ex boyfriends infant
I see my father leaving never to return
I see myself and my mother packing up our house
I see myself sleeping among boxes
I see myself in disneyland eating pretzels
Running away from your family, my family
Because I was so exhausted
I see you telling me you are sad to leave me
I see myself ******* someone else and it meaning nothing
I see myself calling you
I see myself you not calling me back
I see me spending my whole day stressing about that very fact
I see myself wondering what to do with my hair
I see myself being less supportive of myself
I see myself thinking my voice and my thoughts must be an interruption or an annoyance
I see myself being less supportive of others
I see myself feeling a lot of inexplicable pain
With people only being able to be there for me in moments.

I see myself wishing I could get so ****** up I would feel nothing
I could wake up and not worry about the tired and hurting face in the mirror.

These are my dark realities
As dramatic
And ******* lame as that may sound.

I want to turn this wannabe poem around
I wanna write an empowering stanza now.
I have to.

I see myself taking a deep breath
I see myself exhaling it out
Another one
I see myself meditating
I see myself thinking before I speak
I see myself believing my voice is interesting and highly endowed with some truthful brilliance
I see myself needing everyone and everything less
I see myself running and jumping off the mountain, zipping high up above--7,000 feet above sea level
I see myself hiking along trails, sipping mineral water
I see myself staring at the face of the Grand Canyon
I see myself making friends who speak a different language
I see myself tanning, getting inked up
Wearing sun hats, bathing in baths
I see myself being an avid listener
I see myself not living in the past or what I hope or think will be the future
I see myself breathing into the present
I see myself knowing I reached and all I can do is reach, and then to reside in my own grounding
I see myself not obsessing in an unhealthy and traumatic way
I see myself letting the pain I've experienced make me a better human
I see myself finding and feeling secure with trust
I see myself orgasming, feeling immense pleasure
I see myself
I see myself
I see myself.
The gum-flavoured toy
You pop into your *****
Is the cherry you pop
While orgasming on a purple penetrable jelly
Donall Dempsey Aug 2020
JOURNEY

( for Seamus Heaney )

I, the only guy
in our yoga class

we cut short
our meditation

decanting ourselves
from the Samuel Beckett Room No. 2

to a room up above
to see you...be you.

"Why man, you doth bestride
the narrow world like a Colossus

and we petty people
walk under your legs

and peep about..."
we like a crowd of cows

staring at an open five-bar-gate
on a frosty morning

heat rising from us
perspiration stains under oxters

when
an ordinary looking man ambles in

taking his time

looking like a kind uncle
from a long ago summer holiday

and then
you open your mouth

words dancing about in our heads
delighting the senses

and all my female yoga class
moan and groan

"Oh...I so want to...**** him!"

"Shhhhh..!" I sush 'em
"Listen...listen!!!"

I cut back the dogwood
to the bone

it throws its fecundity
about this August garden

as your death is
facebook'd thru

and I stop
to think of you

in the Samuel Beckett Room No. 2
and its orgasming females.

I see you
dig alongside me

dig down
through years of time

a passing nod to your da
peeling spuds with your ma

you laughing at me
telling you of the yoga-ites

"Ah, sure, they only
think they do!"

And in answer to a something
or other I had said:

"Everything takes time...even time
takes time!"

I grasp your hand
in mine

that shy smile
the sheer generousity of you

now you gone
on your last journey

I nod to you
you nod to me

and I cut back the dogwood
a little more
matilda shaye Jul 2019
her hair is longer than I realized and it smells familiar
my stomach feels off as I stare at the posters on the walls
because I’m not sure where to look (she’s so naked as am I)
I decide the top of her head is fine then I decide to let my heart
murmur which I've been avoiding since they diagnosed me at 7
but I'm exhausted and orgasming really takes so much out of me
I decide I’ll only do it three more times then I decide just this once

I do it all again the next night because I’m trying to live my life
that doesn’t fully explain my reasoning but it’s all I have to offer
there’s dozens and dozens of different versions of her and I
want to put it into writing that I only ever liked a few of them
I’ve never before liked each and every part of a person
I've also never even been close to admitting that
so I think this is part progress poem and
part backpedaling

she’s playing with a kid and I know it’s supposed
to turn me on but it’s just making me feel physically ill
I wear my bathing suit bottoms as underwear
she texts me that she’s not even ******* wearing any
I’ll sleep in her bed if I want to only because
there’s not really a point to sleeping in mine
it'd be nice if I wanted to, but I don't, so I go home

she chain smoked her entire pack of american spirits
lying completely naked on her ***** nylon carpet
I realized about halfway in that I didn't want to touch her
I turned to my left to a shrine of Joan Jett and then
I choked on her **** piercing for the very last time
she got upset and tried to question what went wrong
for the first time in my life I just shut the **** up
because blaming it on her star sign felt too insensitive

— The End —