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I was dancing at a dance club
Two stepping all about
When my thumb, it found a belt loop
And I couldn't get it out

I shifted and I wiggled
I ****** my hips out front in time
I bent over and I shimmied
I was twerking on the line

Now, I ain't no Miley Cyrus
You can believe me now or not
I wasn't up there twerking
It's because my thumb was caught

I sashayed and I moseyed
And others got up too
My thumb was still encumbered
What the hell was I to do?

I was twerking like a mad man
Not knowing how, or  why
But the pain in my one digit
Just made me want to die

Maybe now I know the reason
Miley Cyrus did her dance
She wasn't up there being slutty
She had her thumb stuck in her pants

Now, I'm through with twerking
And there's is one thing that you'll find
That unlike young Miley Cyrus
You don't want to watch me from behind!!!
Simon Soane Dec 2018
In 1410 the village of Little Darling was a pretty nice place to live,
it’s houses were stout and wonderful and the people had lots to give,
the lord who owned the area was benevolent, he never ruled with an iron claw,
he spoke with softness and kindness, not knowing a cajoling roar,
he left the people to get on with their lives, unless they needed a helping hand
and then he’d be there to provide a peg up somewhere in his land.
Because of this the folk who made home here had it better then most peasants from this time,
who were condemned to a life of grinding servitude as if their living was a crime,
they were happier and joyful and free from the toil of subjugate,
each second was a pleasure and every minute spent first rate,
however there was one thing they shared with those who spent every day under the cosh;
everyone was filthy, no one liked to wash.
Only about once every 10 days would they pull bathing water from the well,
If they were especially filthy and their stink they wished to quell,
the rest of the time they didn’t care that they resembled a muddy shrub,
or their faces were still covered in last weekend’s off grub,
nor did they think it mattered if their hair was a matted mucky mess
or that compost heap didn’t smell more than their locks, it actually smelt less,
to them water was mainly a drink when their mouths were feeling parched and shoddy,
not a soothing liquid  with which to  cleanse their body.
Everyone in Little Darling didn’t mind being ***** and looking a unhygienic fright,
actually not everyone, everyone’s not quite right.
Alice always wondered why folk didn’t wash
and that’s not because she wanted everyone to be pretty, pristine and posh,
she just pondered as she daily made herself all gleam,
“why does nobody else round here care about being clean?
They all wallow around in their own filth like a burrowed germ,
more buried in soil than a busy earth worm,
I don’t get when there is plentiful water from wells not that far away
why don’t they dose themselves in the aqua good at any point in the day?
She thought, “Of course it’s their own life and if you never harm anyone else you can never do anything wrong,
but how how how can they fester in their own awful pong?”
So every day Alice would get up before she heard the going to work bell
and go and fetch some water to cleanse herself of smell,
she’d make herself all fresh and totally sans of grit and straw
and revel in the gleam she had coming out of every pore.
Everyone else in Little Darling all thought Alice was great,
a truly smashing lass who had tons of friends and mates,
yeah sometimes they’d remark to her “I don’t get your penchant for keeping yourself immaculate if I had to say
but who cares, I love you, have a fantastic day!”
And yes due to the mud in the village sometimes Alice would get herself all shiny and within a couple of hours look like she’d just crawled out of a cave,
but she didn’t mind as starting the day with a sparkle was what she did crave!
One fine day the folk of Little Darling decided to throw a big party as they adored a drink, a chat and a jive,
just have a massive night of  dancing, where they could give appreciation for being alive,
as Little Darling was a ace place they invited another village to join in the hedonism,
as they wanted folk to bask in hours through a wonderful prism!
When Alice heard news of the shindig she let out a chirping coo,
as revelling in the realm of fun was what she was really made to do!
As the week whiled to an end the day of the party came,
Alice could hardly contain herself as carousing ran through her brain,
she picked out her favourite garments feeling all of a super gathering quiver,
and then full of beans moseyed on down to the river,
she washed away with gusto and dressed all primed to go out,
“I’m on my way to get down and groove!” was her gleeful shout.
She started making her path to the good times, feeling all content,
she couldn’t wait to be immersed in the hub of blazing merriment,
as she was walking to the barn where the party was she encountered others making their journey to fun,
lit they all were by the going down sun,
someone said “hey Alice, I reckon you’ve spent an eternity scrubbing yourself for this bash”,
another said “yeah, I bet you’ve wasted hours by the river to get yourself prepared for this night on the lash!”
Alice replied and remarked, “yes I may have used my time getting myself ready and not been able to enjoy the chills and sits
but at least I don’t have hay in my hair like you ******* smelly *****!”
Everyone burst out laughing and happy all skipped to the revelry,
the slow dusk sky reflecting calm as far as the eye could see.
They jaunted into the barn with the music already in full swing,
the harp, drum, lute and trumpet players all doing their tuneful thing,
Alice grabbed a jar of foaming ale and started moving her body to the beats,
each noise in the air a consummate amazing treat!
Then from out of the corner of her eye she spotted a guy with dancing around in the air,
who'd cleaned his garb,
and washed his hair!
Alice thought "Wow! That guy doesn't look like his stench would make my opticals weepy,
in actual fact he makes my heart all leapy!"
They saw each other and felt swirls and sparks,
a knowing of what could and will be lover’s larks,
a chance they both knew could never be missed
and finalised their first look synchronicity with a longing kiss.
Everybody else stopped,
turned to look,
and knew a little bit more about
loves' rushing roars,
and couldn't help but breaking out
into a round of applause.
Alice felt a dawn,
reciprocated the smile of her fresh guy
and hand in hand they left the barn,
on their lips a glimpse of forever,
and went to find a empty stable,
where they could become all
***** together.
Erwinism Oct 8
The sun was still cold in your breath,
half-awake still dreaming and we are way past that hour,
just waiting for the first light to break in and steal the dark away like a stereo.

The air was fetid,
reeking of sad news,
swirling about,
but we moseyed along carrying dustpans and brooms,
lugging garbage bags
like we were sanitation Santa,  sweeping cigarette butts,
and in them I saw burnt time,
and in them I see mounting bills.
The cold air was doing a number
on us, dumping its oblique
sorrow on our then ragged frame
as we emptied waste baskets.

At times when I utter the word doctor,
your eyes go creamy,
your ears wag,
perhaps I was doing an impression—
an echo
of a forgotten life.
People were still groggy on their cardboard beds, their lips wearing soot as they drooped down on the side of their faces, the night weighed heavy on them.
Unlike most sight that slide through and veer away from despair in the flesh, yours fell on them with flecks of your heart knowing that from them we are dimes apart.
We swept, but your broom was nimble, springing into life in those days. Out of nowhere your hope swung a fist. I always remembered those words like a promise and held on to them like a limb.
“Though the world may forget, don’t dare forget who you are.”
Adrianna Aarons Dec 2014
He moseyed on over to me,                                 I
stammered a shy
hello,

He smiled sweetly as my gaze                           fell
to his hands and wrists
where promises might show.

There was something about him,                      in
his eyes I saw something
broken, something dying inside.

I ached to fix him, repair him,                          love
him back to life, bring the fire back
into his eyes, make him mine.

We whispered a promise of forever,                with
his little finger wrapped around
my own.

I meant it, and I never did take                        him
for a liar, so I’m living three hundred
miles away thinking I’m not alone.
Ronald Jones Jun 2015
the butler
brought in
the tray of libations
and it seemed
her ******* were
thinking me as
I thanked him
and wondered if
I must choose
between his
unfamiliar hug
            or
her gaudy ****
so I moseyed
over to a
corner and
tried to
explicate the
dinner gong
tolling across
the mansion's
badlands like
strident
smacks
ringing
out of a
*******'s dungeon--
I could almost
hear the ****
Piper getting
paid or asking
to be--
Well, I guess,
after all,
she was holding
my tray,
wasn't he?
Satirizing a great poet and bon vivant.
He wore a wife beater.
Which hung on him more like a to do list-
Than his clothing choice for the day.
His choice of beverage of the night was Coors Light.
Twenty four of them.
Although it would be hard to argue that something else would have been in his hand
Had it too been on sale at 2 for $20.
His math skills were heightened on Fridays.
On the weekend he was somewhat of a savant.
Dividing dollars by can volume to determine.
His most frugal choice.
As he moseyed to his car,
Hips struggling to hold his
Tattered sweatpants,
One wondered whether it too ran on alcohol.
I walked or sauntered or dashed or stumbled, no...
staggered! or swaggered, or was it stepped, no...
I jogged or, bolted, no stomped or slid no...
hopped! or was it skipped no hop skipped and jumped...
or sauntered! no i said that one, it was swaggered! no....
I stampeded or dogged or shlepped no bounced or was it...
I stamped or ed or rolled? no strolled! haha yes Strolled! no...
I stalked that was it or was it followed no no it was sojourned
sojourned! sojourn? no it was galumphed or marched, no charged...
aha sauntered! no! ******! it was ambled or slogged, trounced? or tromped, no rambled, yes I rambled on! no no thats not right, I plodded, trod no tread! no strided, thats not even a word, sloped, no...
govereetted, or persnicketied, or skreed, or preened, no no no none of that is right....
I sauntered! no no, swaggered! no was it promenade? prowl. no patrolled, parolled, no no thats way off...
I trekked, trudged, no fudged, no dogged! like george! he dogged it all the time, no I said that one, slogged or sashayed no trooped, no perambulated, or moseyed? or hoofed it? no it was definitely sauntered, no no it wasn't sauntered it was a dawdle, no lurched, or hawked, no stopped,
no no it was definitely movement, thats it! it was a movement! no no no that can't be right I paced, yes i paced back and forth and thought about life for a awhile....

no no that wasn't it either it was really more of a strut, or a saunter, yes saunter! no swaggered! no no
**** you words....

I wandered or was it roamed, no limped, gimped! no...

minced.... or no yes! minced... wait.... no it was a hike, yes I hiked up a mountain with  friend of mine, or was it climbed, no no thats not right...
I slandered, no.... pandered! no... I meandered, haha actually no i think  it was a peruse, or no a beat! no.... I cut a rug! or actually i think it was more of a stumble no....

ah yes it was walked, I walked about sixty blocks today
Annie Oakley May 2016
I have miraculously moseyed my mind into a mysteriously mellow mood!
My masterminded misfit momentarily mesmerized me.
I magically muted my meticulous mind,
Merry-go-round memories minced.
Meanwhile I am absolutely blitzed!
I witnessed a previously unknown apostle ministering to the self imposed deaf at Daytona Beach , shouting out the gospel to vacationers that moseyed down Capitalism Avenue , a souvenir committed to memory  just like the pelicans , white sand , salt water taffy , dining at Joe's Crab Shack on fish and chips , the ships returning home far off in the distance , trinket shops lining the streets ..
Two guitar players performed on the pier , hopelessly out of tune and a bit tone deaf in my humble opinion ... Shady characters roamed the shore selling condo's by the score , seagulls knew I had tangerines and wouldn't leave me alone ..
The waves crashing into shore caught us off guard and ruined a two hundred dollar camera , a fifty five mile drive back to Orlando took us two **** hours !
Mickey Land was turning money hand over foot with eighty degree temperatures at the end of December , the boats on her canals were the high point of my vacation , cranberry juice on the veranda overlooking a par three provided a treasure trove of entertainment , men and women penning their frustrations over that little white ball with a mind of it's own , looking right and left before cheating like anyone really cared ..
People watching on Boardwalk , a cup of tea at Old Key West , a riverboat jaunt across Lake Buena Vista , a fried seafood feast at a local restaurant ..Such is the life of the temporary Floridian .. Sun screen , ruffled road maps , cool shades and Palm tree dreams ...
Copyright January 9 , 2016 by Randolph L Wilson * All Rights Reserved
Candy Glidden Jul 2010
There we were together in the little town cafe'
Neither of us knowing that we were to meet that day
As I sat across the room his stare was quite intense
Once I looked up smiling just to take a quickened glimpse
Although he made me smile by the way he looked at me
Still I never thought my soul mate he could be
I couldn't help but wonder why he was over there
Looking at him sweetly he must have felt my stare
Gently he arose and moseyed closer, near to me
As he sat down at my table, brushed his hand across my knee
My heart began to race, my eyes were all a flutter
Words escaping from my mouth were all but just a stutter
He asked me if I believed in love at first sight
If two hearts could bind together by the moons casting light
Shall the stars dance before us in our glory we've yet to see
Or shall we dance together and let the feel of love proceed
For if the night shall vanish without a kiss from you
I'm afraid that come tomorrow I'll know not what to do
This couldn't be for real, a dream perhaps I'm in
Maybe my imagination is playing tricks on me again
As he touched my hands with the gentle feel of his
It felt as though I floated, deep into a midnights bliss
Do I believe in love, love at first sight
I didn't believe in much until this very night
As he leaned across the table, his hand touching my cheek
Our lips were drawing nearer, my body was becoming weak
Though I fell into a trance as our lips did embrace
Never will I forget the look upon his face
It was as if he'd known me forever, though I'm sure we'd never met
Thank you God for allowing me, this night I'll never forget
Was this more than just reality, maybe it was my wish
Something about that night, it didn't vanish without a kiss
Although the night decreased rapidly turning into a beautiful day
Our hearts were bound as one that night together they shall stay.
Copyright2006  Candy R. Glidden
David Ehrgott Oct 2015
Nearly twenty years ago
I can't believe time flies
When all I had upon my mind
Was thoughts of getting high

I never understood my mom
Popping pills at tea
or How my grandpa polished
off a case a day, no, three

Not wanting to become insane
or Die diseased so early
I decided at a legal age
To smoke the ****, for surely

of All the places in the states
Just one said do it legally
I packed my bags and set out for
Mendocino County

I took my time, such a long ride
on 80 from New Jersey
Enjoyed the sights but, flew no kite
Still, made my travels worthy

The California National Guard
and the DEA
Set up a post to check all cars
in/out of the county

It took a couple hours then
For them to inspect me
I must admit here that this greet
Did make me feel uneasy

They made it very clear to me
That I could smoke' the ****
Just don't try to take it out
of Mendocino County

I said "Okay!"  They said "Drive Safe"
I buckled ; drove away
I drove along the two-lane road
Admittedly Amazed

I turned a corner , hit the brakes
There was in front of me
A farmer man, who did tell me
Get out, you have to learn the ****

I abided easily
to learn most all or everything
I could so one day I could be
An expert in Weedology

I spent nearly a week or two
Finding out all that I could
But, I was high and this did lead
to some info misunderstood

I learned cultivation, irrigation
debugging plants by spraying pepper
Planting, pruning, a beginner
But, after time, I did get better

Then one day after a cup
of morning Bhang, I did awake
Then moseyed on to brighter pastures
****** alone, I was quite baked

Would you believe ; I can't believe
A girl I knew from New Jersey
A ***** from Hawthorne she despised me
This feeling was so mutually

After I escaped her grip
And fed her some more bitter lip
I took my bag, it was a lid
and slowly rolled another spliff

I found a house to my amaze
It said "For Rent" read in my haze
I paid the rent/security
Pulled out a blunt, began to blaze

There was no time that I remember
From months of May through to September
That I wasn't high all day
I knew I had to move away

****, (the grass) grown everywhere
Just pick some off, feel better, there
No one left out of the haze
Everybody there did blaze

I got so bored, I was so teased
Stop it!  Stop it!  Stop it, please!
I can't be ****** all' of the time
Oh, shut up and smoke more of this ****

I could not take it anymore
I closed the house and shut the door
All the smoke I once adored
Soon became all such a bore

I packed my bags and said goodbye
To all my stoner friends still high
I headed north to Oregon
To grow tomatoes, seemed like fun

Twenty years now have been spent
Remembering those cronies
Those mendacious merchant mendicants
of Mendocino County
Brian McDonagh Jan 2019
I can't always run,
But my hiding's not too bad.

A former boss told me
To stay longer for a work shift.
My lips said yes,
But my mind said "Hell no!"
Clocked out,
Casually stepped outside;
Upon passing the host window,
I blitzed to the car, fidgetted with my keys nervously,
And whirred the blazes out of that parking lot.

Each New Year of mine has begun with relatives
Crashing at my family house.
This 2019, I take the interstate back home
To be around the out-of-state.
It's been a long-lasting tradition
And I did what I could
To break apart from that tradition
Even just this time.

At a bar on New Year's Eve 2018,
I relaxed after having made prior reservations,
Just me,
And having moseyed away from family
For just one night.
I'd go to this bar again too:
**** dancing, stellar drinks, young blood...
**** dancing.
Didn't mean to be a Scrooge and mostly not dance,
But at least I escaped and saw new faces around me.

The escape that is never too far away
And is always open around the clock
Is my journal book.
A journal doesn't have to have continents,
Oceans or clouds
To be a world
That revolves around the author.
Natural the paper,
Preserving the pen[cil].

I'm not implying
That I escape this world,
But what a world there is
In escapism.
I know myself as an escapist; I've escaped a lot last year: jobs, choir, poetry groups, church, etc.  I tend to escape where I'm more known, whether distinguished or notorious.  I've clung to the adventure of new...and the new has me enraptured.
Yenson May 2019
Oh..boy, O'Malley hit that ball right outta the park
the crowd hollered and wooped, my bet has made good
I've got lolly in my pocket and jolly on my mind, I scrammed
moseyed down to Fat Albert, had a whiskey and sour, things dandy
so as the sun set I walked down the block and hit Green-a-gogo
the jazz notes were jumping, those cats sure know howta swing
at the bar I called in a tall dry Martini on the rocks, lit a cheroot

Ah, this is a breeze, ain't I just got the freeze with them lollies cooling
She came out of nowhere, looks like Rita Hayworth, sashayed like her
red lips pouting, hips rolling and legs she borrowed from Marilyn
that's Monroe, if you needa ask, she smelt like heaven in springtime
Howdy handsome, she purred, have you been waiting for me
Nope I said,  just landed five minutes ago, what's your poison, honey
make it a highball, easy on the rye, ain't got my guard with me now

this babe was a looker, she's already got me in a choker, my oh my
what brings you down this way, she purred as she took a slug
to find you, I said, cool as a cucumber from Lebowitz Deli downtown
well you're in luck, she said, I am found, she said again
I inhaled slowly and blew cheroot smog away from ole brown eyes
I have two thousand bucks burning a hole in my pocket
I still had my senses too

Hey babe, I said smiling, this ain't no shakedown is it, honey
she smiled and shook those dark tresses, do I look like a moll, she ask
I tell you this honey,.............I’m a dark chocolate lover,
Never had the buzz with the white stuff
so don’t be offended or think me mean, when I say,
I have no interest in the white chocolate,
I prefer them to have no jacket on too
if don’t have a jacket you will know exactly what i’m referring to  

I smiled and winked at her, lets put it this way, I said
I am black as you can see, but a Rabbi visited when I was born
so the Rabbi took your jacket away, she offered, did you a favor
we both laughed, danced, chatted and as we left. I asked
Do you just waltz into bars and pick up men, just like this
She stopped, looked me in the eyes  and said
You're from Royal Spokane Avenue in Philly, aren't you
I nodded, surprised
You're a lawyer, you're divorced and you're a **** gentle man
my friend told me all about you, now lets go swimming with dolphins..............
Neville Johnson Jan 2022
I’m 32 feet in length
36 feet high
Been all around the world
Oh, the docks and sights I’ve seen
Enough to make me sigh
I knew the Sloop John B
We hung out in Nassau
Then we moseyed
To St. Barts, where many parties occurred
I like a choppy wind on glassy seas
With a group of sailors who know what their doin’
Don’t need any pleas
Had a woman fall overboard back in ‘21
That was a close one
Not at all fun
She got off at the next port
Fine by me, I’m a good sport

I’ve had seven skippers
They’ve all been pretty good
Mr. Bill is the latest
He does what he should
I’ve become a luxury cruise ship
That’s fine by me
As long as you keep me polished and clean
Call me the Seventh Sea
Oh God,
it took me forever to get up
because I'd been taking something that was made up
by a Kitchen chemist in South Hackney

the word on the street was he's *******
with the molecule chains and he's doing
Fukin magic

So I moseyed on down there to see him
and I found him, he was
a busy bee and the ****** was buzzing

I asked him to add some more white in
to the mixture that he was concocting
I'm sure that he added Naproxen
because now I can't feel any pain.

Nothing's as good as the first time
not the second the third or the
four hundred and ninety-fifth time,
we're just kidding ourselves
killing ourselves
or
selling ourselves

terms and conditions apply.

The cops came around and they asked me
did I know of a chemist in Hackney
to them, I replied and
quite honestly,

Boots.
Drugs

— The End —