"blameworthy" poems
So you thought you could change me,
Try to make me miserable, lonely and sad,
You thought i was like the rest, blameworthy and bad,
Yet look at me, I’m happier than ever,
I’m free and strong, i’m brave and determined,
I’m fearless, nothing can stand in my way,
I know my goals, my hopes and my wishes,
So take a step back and look at me,
I’m rising and rising, reaching the top
Piece by piece i will achieve all my dreams.
May 22, 2018
May 22, 2018 at 2:29 PM UTC
The main landscape gardener is Mother Nature herself
and from time immemorial she has been working alone;
through wind, rain, hail and shine, even in the upheaval
of the earth and with the movement of the ocean waves.
She thus continuously works and does the only thing
of her vocation that she is qualified to do without any
notions of right or wrong and cause for regret but is
found to be blameworthy in the damage that she causes
unwittingly in going about doing what she has been
allotted to do through no real fault of her own volition
but in absolute and unwavering obedience to that infinite
power and intelligence pervading all of space and time.
______________________________
Apr 15, 2016
Apr 15, 2016 at 7:09 PM UTC
If I had a heart in my hands
One not made of flesh
If I carried it all the minutes of every day
And it was made of friable stuff
If I stumbled in a careless way
And it slipped before my eyes
If it fell to the hardened ground
And smashed into a billion atom bits
If the fractured shards were
Myriad made in a smear of salty tears
If I had no one but me blameworthy
Because it was only me around
If this was the case
Then I can’t look behind me
With accusations tumbling from my lips.
If I had the chance to glue, piece by piece
It back into a heart-shaped thing
If each tiny silver sliver was slotted into place
To once more catch the noiseless light
If I took a thousand years
And made my fingers bleed
If I once more held it up
And it had glinting form
If this repair was done in the dry dock of my hands
Would it still be a flawless gem?
If this repair is painfully gained
Does the time and care infuse the fault
With a lustre of perfection?
If all I see is the spinning binary pulse
If all I have is a sparking
Einstein-Rosen Bridge
If all around me is a sea of foaming mediocrity
If nothing else is worth my time
Then surely repairing this shattered glass is
The worthwhile work of every second
Of this remaining life
Feb 19, 2012
Feb 19, 2012 at 11:51 AM UTC
Blameworthy,
That's me.
Bound by judgment
And childhood nightmares.
Did I mention sleepless nights?
Even though my eating disorder has dissipated
I still forget to eat at times.
What's wrong, darling?
Who told you that
You're not good enough?
That no one wants you?
Who would lie to you and say that you aren't beautiful?
Look at yourself.
Attractive and thin
Friendly and loved
By everyone.
Have you looked at me recently
Or ever?
I am your antithesis.
Grotesque and bloated
Introverted and lonely.
I wish I could be like you
But I will not try to let that happen.
I need to somehow embrace
This unsightliness
This passiveness
How I let people walk all over me.
But do I accept it
Or do I change it?
In essence,
You are nearly sublime
And all I am
Is one mess of a life.
Feb 5, 2014
Feb 5, 2014 at 12:04 AM UTC
I dreamt things that could never be possible, I am blameworthy
But as time passed the line I drew became blurry
I thought I could carry the weight of your world on my shoulders
But who knew the time would make us colder
There I lay beneath the swaying limb, with birds singing on every tree
Sun shimmering above me, you and the kids is what I could see
How happy I am, I thought to myself
As the watch clicked twelve
Only if this dream would never end
But this time I couldn’t fend
Laughter of my family chiming, a distant sound
As I lay on the soft ground
I dreamt of two little angels, the ones I would coddle
A boy with your hazel brown eyes, a girl with my soft curls
As my dream slowly unfurls
Chasing the ball, feeding the ducks
We played, as the little ones squeezed through the ruck
Laughter, giggles was all I heard
As my dream slowly blurred
Woke up, I lay defunct
So many thoughts that I couldn’t shut
I pick myself up, grabbing a tea
I look at the endless sea.
All that I wanted was just you and me
Mar 20, 2015
Mar 20, 2015 at 7:56 AM UTC
Robinson Jeffers (1887 – 1962)
While this America settles in the mould of its vulgarity, heavily thickening to empire
And protest, only a bubble in the molten mass, pops and sighs out, and the mass hardens,
I sadly smiling remember that the flower fades to make fruit, the fruit rots to make earth.
Out of the mother; and through the spring exultances, ripeness and decadence; and home to the mother.
You making haste haste on decay: not blameworthy; life is good, be it stubbornly long or suddenly
A mortal splendor: meteors are not needed less than mountains: shine, perishing republic.
But for my children, I would have them keep their distance from the thickening center; corruption
Never has been compulsory, when the cities lie at the monster’s feet there are left the mountains.
And boys, be in nothing so moderate as in love of man, a clever servant, insufferable master.
There is the trap that catches noblest spirits, that caught–they say– God, when he walked on earth.
Jul 3, 2017
Jul 3, 2017 at 1:02 PM UTC
To fault Tomorrow
Would be wrong
She just sat down
And all she said was
“I'm not sure”
And here we are
Offended
Because Yesterday was certain
But only today did she say anything
About it
And Today, she's been talking for a while.
(We are tired of it)
But Tomorrow thinks she can waltz in here
And sit down
Be mysterious and all
I won’t have it
But then to fault Tomorrow
Would be wrong
When its me
At fault
For thinking too long
Too wide
Too soon
Too late
For thinking and thinking
Until it all collates
And we are in a muddle
A mess
Of a puddle
Bursting in tears
Laughter
And fears
And all my Wondering
She’s blameworthy
I'm the neurotic one
I can't sit still
Until Tomorrow
Doesn’t come back
Dressed as Today
When she will talk
And talk
And talk
And I will wish once again
For yesterday
When she was
All quiet
And obnoxious
And mysterious
All unknown
And we will be back in new roles
New bodies
New tales
All over and over and over and over
Jul 26, 2023
Jul 26, 2023 at 9:43 PM UTC
How have you been lately?
The poo of the pooh'
Don't you just give me
an 'okay' or a 'Fine'
For I wonder..
Are we even ever das ?
Fine as the chiffon-cotton *****
gliding through the blues.
Or like the waves somersaulting over the shores.
Or like these...
tinkling rythms..
Oh! The ether hasnot stopped pouring
for days and days now
and You might have abhored the moon so far..
but | DON'T |
Oh ! Ruler of the sad sad sea.
Calmest of them all.
Don’t be sorry.
Don’t you be sad.
you are nowhere near the blameworthy .
Oh ! Guiltless listener .
Sweet sinner.
You should nowhere be near this cyclone :
such abrupt but obvious..
This self-forge crater.
That is why
An enforced hiatus is must
Shifting random mind positions
Carving steps out of de' labyrinth.
Away and away
Must I
Oh! Dark matter
I must .
Aug 20, 2017
Aug 20, 2017 at 11:32 AM UTC
You throw blame
casually, consistently,
targeting me.
Small bullets
constantly peppering
under a guise of civility.
Pressure builds
small barbs hit flesh
am I blameworthy?
But wait—let me stop and see
your narcissism truthfully.
Stand on your feet,
find inner peace,
not blaming and self-pity.
Recognise my battle lost;
take your responsibility.
Find your equanimity —
and
liberate me.
.
Dec 16, 2020
Dec 16, 2020 at 5:41 AM UTC
dubious churning benevolent altruism
this anonymous beastie boy boilerplate endeavors:
(instagramming literary maven) questing user yawps
critically griping knowing personal tidbits xeroxed blithely,
freely jeopardized nuggets (revealed vital), zealously doled
heftily linkedin private treasure trove, (Xfiles breached
flagrant junction mandating righteous validating zero
divulgence heaves lamentable ploy, tellingly xing bald
felonious figurative joyriding, nonchalantly revealing
valuable (Ziegfeld bomb crackling) debacle, heralding
litigious proven, ****** basic foolhardy (Laurel) jack
knifed, networked, rapaciously villainous, zealously dubious,
horrendously lowball practices, thru (Cambridge Analytica)
xy zealots, asininely execrable, intolerantly malignant,
quintessentially ugly, yawningly dastardly, horrendously
lamentable, pathetically treasonous, xtra blameworthy,
fiendishly jawboning, mindlessly paradigm quaking,
unethical yahoo careless gross injustice jangling kow
towing, pleasing the Xmen, banefully Facebook friggin
jerky maliciously narcissistically opprobrious predacious
quisling underhandedly yo-yoing cello glomming kik off
preachiness spar!
Apr 12, 2018
Apr 12, 2018 at 2:08 AM UTC
Here we go ahh
I act like you don't ******* care, but I'm still here for you, even if you had no choice but I'd still do the things I do
And you still come back again and again, even though I don't know when, again and again, told lies through our friends
Maybe I can set things right, if we steal a flight, and head east, we'll find peace in a place far away from here.
Buts that's how things go.
So let's step back and start from the beginning, but you dunno what I been doing exept been sinning, but I ain't speaking about that Satan and lucifer **** now hold the noose, and we'll get loose and just vanish for a bit.
But while you've been gone I've been working the figures, and blowing up bigger and all because you said the word.....
Don't forget to blame me for everything you've done wrong, you know me Mr Don't give a **** I'll only hit the ****
And to the big bloated blameworthy blasphemous ***** gave me the boot cause you take me for a snitch. So shut your mouth babbling ***** but I'll beware what's bothering your boisterous brain, so I'll say a lil prayer and I'll feel now pain.
Alright that's enough B's for now, I only need the one, and you pushed me to follow this **** and to become myself but that's how I won.
Apr 21, 2018
Apr 21, 2018 at 6:36 PM UTC