In the darkness,
all I could feel was the
emptiness that you left
behind...

I'm grasping for as much air I can get...
My head is barely above water.
So this what it feels like...
To be consumed by so many emotions at once..

My walls are higher than I thought and I
                                    am not so sure
                                           that they will
                                                   actually come
                                                                  down this
                                                                              time.

I do not think I have ever felt this alone
since middle school...
And that is also when I was in my darkest place..
which is what scares me the most.

Looks like that dream I had came true...
I needed you
and you could not be bothered...

I try to give all the souls I care about
as much of the world and pieces of heaven I can give,
no matter what time it is or what I am doing.
And believe me, I try my absolute hardest that sometimes
it drains me...
But you know what ?
       that is okay because all these souls that I love,
are what matters the most....
-  -  -
But wait...
when it comes to me , these souls do not think I am worth any part of this world
or even the slightest piece of heaven,
or a minute of the day...
So tell me why,
I continue to give my all to these souls that I love so dearly...

Why do I catch myself feeling this way in certain moments...
Maybe I should have let you go when everyone told me to.
I'm usually good at hiding these feelings from you and not having them show, because I just keep them aside because they DO NOT MATTER ANYMORE.
They are irrelevant. We are both moving on.
Why why why why
I thought I was done with all these ******* feelings.
****.