I like how you took it slow
and waited for about two months,
even though you were soon to go.

Together we were chill,
because you are a man
and drama makes me ill.

I think we were perfect,
but the miles were far.
Maybe if the timing was different...

I only have two questions,
two things I don't understand:
Why did we start this? Why did it end?

Toys get lost.
So-called "best friends" cost
much more than ere thought.

Flowers wilt.
She felt gross in kilts;
too tall, like on stilts.

Santa: ****.
Rain annoys the roof.
Wishes on a hoof.

Soda bloats,
so do root beer floats
and ice cream boats.

People die.
I still wonder why...
They're too tired to cry?

Money's spent.
Must speak eloquent,
yet not what she meant.

I think a lot about you and me;
about what We used to be
when it was summer and everything was happy.

I think a lot about the fun We used to have,
how you could never make me mad,
and a phone call made a day good from bad.

I think a lot about the kisses you gave;
about what it meant to me when you came and stayed
when it was inconvenient for you, and I had to be brave.

I think a lot about the time I said
how I'd give you one hundred percent 'til the end,
and near the finish line: "Trying not to get attached," I read.

I think a lot about how I started to cry,
about what I told myself to deny
when it was clear We was soon to die.

I think a lot about how We was so mature,
how long distance made me forcibly stronger,
and it would be a waste of everything to be a doubter.

I think a lot about what you could now be doing;
about what you could be thinking
when it was sixteen days ago that marked the ending.

I think a lot about the fact that I miss We and you,
how I sincerely hope that you do too,
and my fragmented heart breaks when I realize it's probably not true.

It makes me sad that I can't tell
about all the things that have happened
since we last spoke.

Like: "I've started to smoke."
And you'd tell me to "be careful,"
even though it's ***, not cigarettes.

I finally have a job that wasn't easy to get.
It's that barbecue place I told you about-
the one that hired me in the summer

when we were still together.
I wish you read the poems I wrote you,
and at the same time I'm glad you didn't,

because in them are a lot of things I only admitted
with word and on paper.
Like: "I loved you...

and still do."
I'm not sure if you broke my heart
or just hardened it against everyone frozen.

I was thinking about you most when...
I was going to try to think of something,
but never mind,

because I realized I think about you all the time.
You were my heaven on earth, but thanks to God,
without you, the world's hell.

We've never had much
Not time together (-1)
Or the promise of forever (-1)

Don’t need to be pessimist
Anyone can see
The ***** glass we share is half empty

When I try to count
Things add up weird
There are mostly negatives here

Why do we do this
When there’s hardly a reason? (-1)
It’s just another one of life’s seasons (-1)

We can’t control what happens (-1)
You’re going to be leaving (-1)
At that certain time that’s coming

When the time is here
These feeling will **** (-1)
Love’s flying towards me (but I’m trying to duck) (-1)

I never want to feel it
Or say those three words
Because then things will be worse

What the **** is this?
It’s really quite stupid (-1)
That we both agreed to go through this

If I were God
I would send
A fleet of guardian angels
To protect you ‘til the end

If I were God
I would give
You everything you’d need
To survive and to live

If I were God
I would bless
The road you walk
So that you’d never stress

If I were God
I would never
Let a tear down your face
Into the big river

If I were God
I would remove every obstacle
So that when you fight for our country
You would be unstoppable

If I were God
I would make birds sing
To lift your spirit
When things start faltering

If I were God
I would make water spout
When you’re in Iraqi desert
And there’s nothing but drought

If I were God
I would provide you with meat
So that you would always have
Something to share and something to eat

But if I were in control
I would never let you go
So that I could lay in bed with you
In our very own home

Passionate kiss
Hips pulled closer
Thighs spread
Lips everywhere

Lustful
Wanting

Back arched
Hands grabbing
Eyelids fluttering
***** whispers

Senses heightened
Desire deepened

Body quivering
Breath unsteady
Satisfied sighs
Content moans

Sweaty
Spent

Legs crossed
Hands folded
Head down
Knee bouncing

Nervous
Awkward

Crinkled eyes
Genuine laugh
Eye contact
Leaning in

Comfortable
Easy-going

Forehead kisses
Holding hands
Head on shoulder
Arm around waist

Adoring
Protective

I’m unsure of the future.
I don’t know why because it’s set in stone.
Maybe it’s because I’m looking for a way out.
There has to be another way for us to make this work.
I’m keeping all this to myself because,
While you don’t seem content with the future,
You seem to have accepted it.

I don’t want to upset the boat.

We’re floating.

There’s only so much time.
It should be kept unspoiled.
I secretly hope you’re looking for a way out also.
I want to tell you, but not too soon.
Where is the balance of time?
How do I know when is too soon or too late?
We've only just begun,
And I get attached quickly and easily.
So maybe I’ll wait a little longer for you,
Even though you might be here already.

Don’t rock the boat, Naomi.


Maybe I’ll go with you…..

*Drowns

Q: Have you ever had the pleasure of a peace of quiet?

A quiet so loud that your mind goes from a euphoric and blissful silence to a resounding, deafening, and screaming black-out of sound. The quiet being the only matter in existence that your mind is filled with nothing else. It consumes you from the inside out and forces you to drown in it. A quiet that that takes away everything tangible and sensory. You have no air to breathe or taste, no color to see, no ground to feel beneath your feet. You begin to think that the quiet is all of the things it is blocking out- it thumps in your ears, giving you a headache; it blinds you with flashes of light; it chokes you; it fills your mouth with an unpleasantly tangy, salty, and bitter taste.

(But it is actually doing none of this. In fact, these “symptoms” are created by yourself in an attempt to recover everything that was before silence.)

A: Me neither.

The president and his wife-
they smile and wave.
The actress walking down the street-
she smiles and waves.
The schoolboy in the hall is a robot
who somehow behaves.
This woman on the bus tells her husband she loves him,
with her eyes in a daze.
An elderly man on the way to the doctor, stops,
and for some cigarettes pays.
A young man somewhere is dating a girl,
‘cause he must keep a secret of the fact that he’s gay.
I’m keeping things quiet so I don’t have to tell lies
about the real life I’m living that’s “led me astray”.

Anything that makes noise
Should not be done on a Sunday.
Don’t mow the lawn,
Don’t vacuum your home.
Respect the stillness that is meant to be.
There are but few exceptions
(However, your yard work and
Home improvement projects are not included).
The birds singing, for example.
Or the  sound of breakfast sizzling
Or the whisper of coffee pouring.
The loudest thing that should be heard
Is the laughter of company.
Family and friends are what the day is for.
If you don’t have those, then meet a stranger
So that next week, you have a friend for Sunday.

I''ll have my coffee black
And my pancakes chocolate chipped.
Don't take the paper back,
I was reading those comics.
What happened to your shirt, darling?
(That stain below the pocket…)
It was crisp and white this morning,
Now it’s got a puddle on it.
Here, let me open the window up-
I want to hear the sunshine.
Here, let me refill your cup.
Oh my, it’s nearly nine!
Wait, I'm going to give you a kiss.
For that there is enough time.

When you rejected me is when I knew I was in love.
Or maybe, when I realized that I had been for a while.
I thought I was dying, but…
It was just you breaking my heart.
And since I’d never felt either before,
It felt like the slow painful ending I always knew I didn’t want.
I’m more than sad,
Because you hate me as much as I love you.
((That’s a lot.))
And one or the other will be the death of me.
My heart is crying
And so am I.

Forbidden,
Outlawed.
Words hidden,
Not allowed.

A thought unspoken,
Is another tally.
Until countless;
Overflowing past secondary boundaries.

Break what has been built up
Over time.
Once released,
Pressure eased.

Hey, I don’t know your name, but I see you in the hallway.
And when I see you smiling, it kind of makes my day.

You dress really nice,
Especially compared to the other guys.

I like your glasses and the way you do your hair.
You don’t have to talk to me if you've got someone-
Or maybe you don’t care…

Just know this took me a lot of guts, because I’m really shy.
I never really took a chance or ever really tried …

So now it’s up to you, I guess, as to what you want to do-
I understand if you think this is weird, I honestly can’t blame you.

It’s just, if I don’t put myself out there, I guess I’ll always wonder
About why I hadn't done a thing like this back when I was younger.

I want to know your thoughts before they are,
But I’m afraid of what I’ll do to myself
And how much farther I’ll take it in my heart.

So I keep quiet, and love and adore from a distance.
And every time you do something that makes me want to draw near,
I take two steps back, giving my heart sickness.

Trying to keep a balance of a scale weighted by emotion
Until you are merely a shadow in the corners of my mind
And an old idea forced to be a foolish notion.

Yet time and time again I prove that to me you’re more than that.
I tire of putting this show on for myself,
Because when the curtain falls, with it drops the act.

The actress, she’s gone- all that’s left is me:
Raw, cracked, slightly faded.
But at least you've come back into my dreams.