A thousand year of times,
Southern river has since dried,
Dynasty long gone,
Worldly goods no longer remains,
Only fragmented memories of the ancient.
What was a blink of an eye,
Is a thousand-year below...

I don't know when I started to realize the hurt

The real reason why this feels like fingers pressed against glass

pushing

So fragile this barrier dividing us
with the answers so clear

And still

as if connection never existed
we live as strangers within ourselves

and with each other

Until there comes a day

where you finally realize
the glass is a mirror

And that
the anger
the resentment
the hurt

you thought you were seeing through


you were actually seeing reflected back













That's the day you wake up

I see it from my very soul
I see a love that has been there for years
your love for me has proven to be my greatest possession
a gift surpassing all things imagined

Brian Hill - 2020 # 128
For Leslie, my greatest inspiration and love 💕

I cannot process a heartbreak that I have yet to begin.
Not a lover, but a friend that left my heart in two.
15 years of memories, laughs, secrets, and sleepovers.
From grade 3, yet you still found it in your heart to leave.

Do you know how it feels? Acerbic.
I just tried to show you the red flags yet he convinced you that I was one instead.
You chose a man that cares for nothing more than getting in your pants, over a friend that only wants you to be safe

Was it easy for you to give us up?
You made the decision so suddenly that the knife of numbness is still stuck in my heart.
I'm scared of what I'll feel once I try to remove it.
For now it's fear of what will happen when you're left with just him.

I look at myself and wonder if I'm a bad person for letting you stay.
Then I look at pictures of you and remember you decided to drop me.
Yet I still pose the the question "Am I the *******?"

Light years away
You can find what you’re looking for
You feel like you’re trapped
In the same routine, it’s monotonous
I know
But life has its responsibilities
And if it didn’t
How long can you hold for
Because it takes time to change things
It takes effort to do things
And it takes passion to be patient
For you’ll never know
What the future holds

Some look for happiness
Some look for love
And others wonder
What’s up there up above
The clouds hold the truth
As the sun spills its secrets
The Earth spins round and round
To keep you safe and sound
We are all walking paradoxes
Waiting for our turn to be relevant
Light years away
I hope you’ll find what you were looking for

Am I in love with you
Or am I in love with the idea of you
The thought that we’ll live our life together
Forever
Day by day with just each other
Growing up
And growing old
With only each other to hold
Creating a family
A home
A life
My heart yearns for such a life
But I’ve fallen in love
With the idea of you
Of you and I
And I’m not even sure if I know you
Anymore