i'm invisible
you see right through me

you see me
but you never notice me

you talk about me
but never to me

you know who i am...
**but you dont know i exist

I fell in love like the way you fall asleep: like getting hit by a ******* bus that knocks you out of your senses and *In that moment I swear we were infinitely in love but ******* you left me on my own. I know love and lust don't always keep the same company but I find great companionship in your eyes and I'm quite hoping you'll stick around. May the odds be ever in our favor of falling in love again in the empty house we once called mine where i'm divergent and I can only be controlled by my fears (of losing you) that send me recoiling in your arms every night; I solemnly swear that I am up to no good and I spend every second wishing you'd love me like I love you.

When she told me- I didn't know how to respond.
Ask questions. Learn more. Be proactive.
I felt my lips move, speaking, asking, pretending I knew
what I was really saying.
It was as if I didn't want to her to get off the phone.
I was scared.
It was odd that she didn't sound comforting.
Is she delivering a prediction of a death sentence?
What is the proper response to that?
I kept asking her what it all meant.
So vague and indiscernible.
She told me to take care of myself.
I guess I'm not doing that already?
Who do I talk to after this?
I don't want pity or concern.
I just want feeling
like my stomach acid is proceeding
to consume every other internal *****
I could ever muster keeping
to go away.
I know I shouldn't worry.
There are people out there without limbs.
Worrying wallflower.
Worrying won't wish wondering away.
Let me deflect.
I can write about it and pretend
that I never did want to live past ten.

Unlike most people I know who make friends everywhere they go;
I have trouble interacting with others.
It took me all long time to make friends,
sure people would talk to me but
I guess they’d got bored
cause they never tried speaking to me again.
I try to make friends once and a while,
but sometimes we have nothing in common
so I stop interacting with them.  
Either way I’m going to have to start to learn
how to make friends,
I can’t be a loner forever.
Or can I?

Always seeing,
always watching.
A close distance.
Like bounds of stars,
close to the eye,
but actually far.
Curious stares
circle the world.
Not really sure
where utopia is,
but being a flower in the wall,
means growing to the sky.
Holding hope like pollen,
and having meet and greets,
with the visitors.
These are the wallflower ways.

I’m the wall flower.
You’re the sun.

I’m dull and near lifeless.
You gleam bright from afar and adored by all.

I’m forever stuck here.
You turn and evolve.

I’m always reaching for you,
But you’ll forever be too far;
Because I’m tucked in a corner,
And you’re the golden star.