She was a delicate flower,
That had yet to be picked.
He was the vicious wind,
That torn away all her petals.
Her happiness soon became
the victim
Of his gusty blows
Now,
There’s nothing left
For her to show

You used me for a lot of things
But I let you
Thinking you'd thank me
You never did.

i’m trying
to wrap my head
around what happened
i’ve never been dropped so
fast after being told
”i love you”

how much
was a lie you told?
how much was just so
you could wrap your hands
around my fragile heart?
i don’t think i’ll
ever know

i want
to scream
rage and make
you understand the
pain

you
spun tales
about a future
you never truly wanted
i was just
an option
an outcome
someone to
maybe choose
to love

and it hurts.

a lot.

my heart was an open house
you let yourself in
and tore the
place to
shreds




i don’t know
if you’ll ever understand
what your decisions
have done
to me

I was your cigarette. You put me out, after lighting me up. Like a cigarette you ignited me and raised me to your scornful lips, you made me your addiction and i let you consume me. You only used me when you were bored and stepped on me once you were done. You'd watch me burn and blatantly ignore the ashes falling. And when u got tired of me, you left me alone and  moved onto your next cigarette.

.
He is just another notch
     on her sterile bed of love.
He is just another victim
     of conquest for her thighs.
She is just another link
     in his daisy chain of woe.
She is just another span
     on his long bridge of sighs.


© Pagan Paul (21/05/17)

As I laid there once more with your arms
wrapped around my waist, head wresting in my chest,
I whispered,
"something keeps leading me back to you, if only I knew."

You lifted your head, smiled and asked what I said.
I never repeated what I said but
you still grasped a little tighter and said,
"it's always been you, there's something about you."

At that very moment; same thought we had in mind,
I realized its not a "something," but a "someone"
and that someone is happily you--

Until an hour later after you held me,
you held another and that
'happily,' turned quickly to 'sadly.'

--Left to question why; question how,
but simply replied,
"I'm used to it, too many to count."

the guilt is heavy in my chest.
I feel *****. used. greedy.
I don’t do it on purpose.
my mind leaves me momentarily.
I was far far away.
too far to run and stop myself.
I let the moment consume me.
now the guilt will overrule me.
the shame is hard to hold.
I feel disgusting and cold.
let the darkness surround me.
like the arms of the boy that hardly knew me.