when the time comes
i want my story to be told
from a place of love,
i want to to know
that there was someone
somewhere
who gave a ****,
even if just a little bit.
please don't twist my words,
don't turn my intentions
into long-term plans,
'cause there is nothing long-term
about the way
somebody's life ends.
i used to have a vision
but at some point
i made a decision to try my luck,
so when the time comes
my only hope is
that my story is told by someone
who gives a ****.

When it came to that dog's heart, his owner's death sure did break it.
He lost his master and his best friend and he simply couldn't take it.
He stayed at his owner's grave and he would continuously howl.
When I tried to move him, he snapped at me and he would growl.
I gave him food but he wouldn't eat and he starved to death.
He couldn't live without his owner and he took his final breath.
A veterinarian tried to help the dog but he growled and snapped at him too.
The vet wanted to save the dog's life but sadly, there was nothing he could do.
The dog was miserable and he was determined to die.
The vet and I couldn't save his life but we sure did try.
Now that dog is with his master in Heaven above.
He couldn't go on because he lost the human who he loved.

Why do I have to earn the salvation I seek?
To be so intervened in discomfort so deeply,
I sculpture a home in it,
I bestride me in delusion,
My inconsistence towards my self,
Ignites a flame in which I burn alive,
Thus
My memories are mere ashes
And I no longer remember your name nor mine,
My inconsistency of will,
Of mind and thoughts,
Of love,
Of meaning,
It invokes of my burdens and failure,
Bewitched to inconspicuousness,
Nothing descends upon me,
But mountain of realization,
That transgresses on all my hopes,
I am hopeless,
A fool,
A puppet of the greatest puppeteer,
An unvalued one,
My theory is based off nothing,
Thus,
I am too a void,
Driven to soak up everyone's essence,
Desperate as a sponge.

Candlelight
drinks my blood from the vine.
Your soft glow
suffocates me at midnight.
Holding close to my chest
I harbour your love,
Your beauty still dazzles me to my core.
Pretentious blues, ugly truths taking flight,
castles built and then ruined by arrogance.
It's you it's you,
it's all for you my love.
Even though I can't compare to your touch.
I know I know
I know I might be nihilistic,
but baby I know I love you.
Please forgive my ugliness.
Please redeem me, free me
from your holdings.
Believe me, relieve me.
Your love will strangle me alive, bury my bones dead my love.
If you need me, need me,
then say so.
Otherwise I might sniff out the candle.
I want to stop dancing with you in the light of the half moon.
But it's you it's you,
it's all for you my love.
Even though your gentle caresses leave bruises on my hands.
I know I know I know
I might be a pessimist,
but you look so beautiful
In the candlelight.
And what is beauty, if not destruction.
I have killed myself over ugly truths.
Might as well I die in glory, take my chances, be remembered for greatness,
like the tragic romance of Romeo and Juliet.
If your love kills me tonight,
that's alright.
It's all for you my love,
You look so pretty in the candlelight
drinking my blood.

I no longer carry your marks on my collarbone,
I already stepped off of that throne;
Or did you push me?
I couldn't tell through
The field of gasoline
I found myself in.

And in this tragic end,
I prayed that I could blend,
But I suppose we can only stand,
As tall as we can bend.

My heart is breaking because it relies on the futility of my nature,
I fear,
My nature's rigidness to accept oblivion,
Will cause me to loose something very dear,
How long should I run knowing that I'll be caught?,
In my own tragic tale and the borders of my mind,
What I have become is my biggest failure,
I cannot support myself,
Neither do I wish myself well,
Until embraced by tides of warmth,
That have yet to approach,
As what simmers in the ocean of memories is beyond my control,
And helplessly I continue to cherish that one memory of warmth.

If only we could learn to be like a little child again,
Not plagued by this world
  Innocence on another level
  Only we could learn to be like a little child again,
   Willing to learn, not wallow-
    -in shame and blame
         We could learn to be like a little child again,
          Love so strong
          We used to get along
                Could learn to be like a little child again,
                     Honesty dripping from our lips
                         But we’re still nice when one slips
                              Learn to be like a little child again,
                                 Obedient in time
                                   Not trying to find an alibi
                                       To be a little child again,
                                        One that was raised
                                          Who forgets their pain
                                            There’s no hatred in our name

I wish to be a little child again

O to be as light as the sky,
To have the earth look up at you and admire your beauty,
To be loved by the birds and hugged by the clouds
I lay onto the icy gravel and look towards the heavens.
Am I too heavy?

I will know what love feels like...

It is lonely,
I want the night's glittering infinity,
To feel the world shine for me and me only
I want to chase the big planets of the sky as i did the ***** i fetched on concrete lawns

I was born to love unconditionally, and so i was chosen for something very special
Scientists take me from the cold and give me a home,
They will give me strange food and show me things beyond my comprehension.

I want to understand...

It's scary, they put me in ship much too small for my already thin body.
There is no light and i'm shivering from fear,...
Or the cold,
I can't seem to spot the difference between the two

The doubt begins to set and I am alone again,
But they tell me I'm prepared to fly,
Higher than the birds,
Higher than the sky.

I plan to be as extraordinary as i promised...

Far from my home the exploding adrenaline scares me,
The tip of my tail is hidden between my shaking legs,
And my heart races faster than the breath that heaves in my chest

There is this everlying, unfamiliar, stink
It won't go away
Something is wrong and i can feel it
Feel it all
There's a faint sound of flaking metal in the distance
It is of no comfort to me.

I am afraid...

The flames warm my worries and within breach of the cold atmosphere,
I can feel the embrace of death caressing me
The impending doom starts to fade away and there is only peace,
Finally peace.

My canine body is now long gone,
Rained onto Soviet soil,
But they are unsurprised.
Was I never supposed to come back?

I know how love feels.

They will remember me
When they look up at the sky and watch my spirit play with the constellations

Although it remains unfinished,
My mission on earth has been completed...
I have kissed the stars for humanity

-To Laika, the space dog