lend me other rooms
leave my mind extending
willingly i take
but consciously i'm fading

such charming colour every bloom*
richly decorating the room
a Grecian vase held an array
spring's loveliest hues did display

the eye captured by flowers
profuse each ones gorgeous powers
of orange and white highlighting shay
with olive green leaf midst the lay

portraying an artistic glory
petals of impressionist's story
the painter scented beauty at play
applying the tones of May

such charming colour every bloom
*on applying the tones of May

i pull up my pants -

leg, leg, zipper,
buckle
.

the room heaves with me ,
a breath released
and a mind
unclear :
.

i don't know if
he made me bleed,

i don't know if he
even
would .
.
.

the sky looks yellow
as he walks me home,
but it's not:

it's blue
and the wind stings my
cheeks
.

All of my dishes, stacked in my room
Am I a slob? Please don't assume.
Clothes—whether *****, clean, or worn—
I know the difference, though they're strewn.

Twinkling lights strung overhead
Match the lamp beside my bed.
With dust my dresser is adorned,
And my favorite chair is red.

I see the beauty in the mess;
Why do you cry in distress?
Mom, I like to live like this.
And I have no one to impress.

How much time did I spend?
Sitting on the bed. Throwing darts. Reading books.
or rather, how much time did I waste?
And more importantly, how much do I have left?

One wall is full of magnificent posters
Of a little girl's future dreams.
The other painted over with vibrant art.
One wall is a diary oozing with words
Of every unwritten song and unsaid thought
The other a painted map of all the adventures
That await her if she follows her heart.
...
Yet these posters cover up gaping holes
The paint covers up the scars
The words cover up the pain
The map her deep flaws
...
The room was never meant to be seen
By anyone else but the girl
Who lived in fear of the demons
Before realizing she
Was the only monster
Living under her own bed.
...
And no matter what she did
To cover up her empty walls,
The suffering
  Would forever
    Be locked
     Within them
...
Her room forever emptier
Than her heart.